After a 5yr Relationship my GF wants to leave me..please help any advise!?

Question

ok guys so after 5 yrs of being with each other my gf wants to leave me because she says that she doesn't see herself with me and that were not meant to be. this is really hurting me because i would have never thought that she would feel that way about me. I even noticed her acting kindof different with me like distant. I have tryed to keep the relationship happy but i guess i failed. by the way shes turning 21 soon so could that be a factor? i honestly thought she was the one and i cant see myself with out her. i guess all good things do come to an end.....what should i do? i feel like wining her back but she made it clear that we werent together anymore and she said sorry. should i take this as a lesson learned and move on? to tell you guys the truth i am scared to move on this girl knows everything about me i opened my heart to her and she knows me better then anyone. it just makes me really sad cause it feels like a dream but then it's reality. any advise from you guys would be appreciated thanks!

Answer 1

Well, you're young, love can be so intense and you just happen to be on the end of still loving while she changed. Hate to say it, but in this day and age, she might have met someone elsewhere, like online.

If you chase her, she'll probably run harder and the other guy will think she's all that. Though your emotions want to do such, try to come with your intellect (i know it's hard when you opened yourself up).

But she seems to have made her mind up, tell her you're not dumb and hope the guy she is emotionally involved with works out. Then move on. Mourn, consider counseling with a tender ear. Get out in nature and work out that pain. Feel it! Get out on the scene, what's your passion, clubs, etc? Hers might flop after a year and then when she comes running back to you...you might have wayyyyy betterrrrrr!!!

If not, then you can consider taking her back.

She's 21, so she dated you at 16/17? She needs to sow her wild oats and see what else is out there, it's natural dating so young for so long.

You use this time to fill your life with passion. Find your soul in meditation (try group meditation in the area), finish school/do well in work, find your other passions (e.g. music, arts, etc), get your body in great shape, fix up your style, get time to contemplate and get out and mingle. LIFE IS TOO SHORT! You'll want to pout and that's natural and fine, but get back up and you see what's out there. Have faith in your prayers, if its meant to be, she'll realize her folly and come back. If not, you will Awaken and find one deserving of you. Don't be afraid to open your heart again but do learn from this relationship what you can.

Have dignity, stay strong! Though you want to crumble, you got to persevere man!  It happens to most of us at some point, let the pain purify you, work through it, and you will come out shining!

Answer 2

Tell her you cheated on her, that way she will feel worse than you do when this whole mess is over.  My advice is don't trust women no matter what, and if you ever get married and have money, sign a prenup first.

Answer 3

Truthfully, it sounds like she has found someone else. There is no other explanation as to why she would end a five year relationship so abruptly. If it was that easy for her to move on, she outgrew you and moved on to someone else.  

Answer 4

You've shared 5 years together and now she's grown to the point where she realizes your not "The One"  Doesn't mean you weren't right for each other during those five years.  She's doing the right thing in letting you go because she knows she can no longer give back the same as you give her.

Answer 5

That is why breaking up is hard to do.  Your still have great feelings for your gf but she has made it clear that she doesn't want anything. There is a reason why she wants to move on so let her go.

Honestly, you need a few weeks to yourself.  You have to acknowledge that it is over, but there is more for you to come.

You have had one great relationship, think of the one that is yet to come where you both feel the same for each other and stay together long term.

Answer 6

You opened your self to this person, and they decided it was not for them (her).

It is good that you were open with her, don't ever change that for fear you'll lose another one.

You don't mention that she had any reasons for you, so I'll just say this. Again, be open with her and tell her that you wish her well, and that you love her and will think of her and hope the best for her now and again. Then walk.

Now, you've set the little bird free, and if she decides it was a mistake ...she'll come back, if she doesn't...she's not the one for you anyway.

Go through the grieving process for love lost...you can google many methods...it may take a while.

Then, pull your self up by the boot straps and re-enter the dating world and enjoy!

I hope this helps, I know it hurts...

Wally

Answer 7

Welcome to MANHOOD, your heart just got broken.  It'd be cool if things happened like they do in the movies where the persistant guy gets the girl back but it's always a guy that wrote that script.  If you are hearing things the like of what you said from her then it's over.........welcome to the club.  Anything you do to try and change this situation will be a point of embarrassment down the road for you.  Stay strong around her at all cost. YOU WILL SURVIVE!!!  and better so now that one obstackle has been hurdled.

Answer 8

She's a fool to say something so stupid! Some women would love to have a relationship that lasts that long, 5 years! I know you're hurting because this is something you didn't expect to happen. You have nothing to be sad for, you did what you could to make things work. Its her loss! So whoever the guy that got her acting crazy like that ain't nothing or nobody special. He'll never be the man that you are!

Answer 9

Move on sorry.

Eraser her.

She is just another memory

Who know maybe she did you a favor.

She may end up hooking up with a bad guy.

Do not dwell on this....

Answer 10

move on...its not like you are going to marry her or something....if so, she'll say no..

Answer 11

i would just move on as sad as it is dont contact her if she wants to work it out or be friends she would contact you sorry for the bad breakup but move on

Answer 12

dont worry man there are plenty of fish in the sea what dosnt kill you only makes you stronger

Answer 13

see this as an opportunity for yourself to see what else is out there. She is very young, and for her to hav ebeen with you since she was 17 is very long. I am sure she feels the need to see how being single feels and this does not mean she will feel like this forever. If it is meant to be man, she will come back. I dont think you should mope about it too much though, you dont want to let her know that you really want her back. If you do she most likley will use you when she needs to or that no matter what she does to you--she knows she can have you when she wants. that is not a good thing.

I say move on .

Your young, live life, experience different things. It may take time, and you may be lonely but time will heal and your going to move on.