Age of Parents of Adopted Children?

Question

I've been looking into adopting a child 12 years or older, the laws say you must be 21, but if my husband is 26 and I am 20 (figure it takes a year for an adoption to go through), can we still get things rolling right now? Or do we have to wait until I am at least 21 also?

Answer 1

I believe it is truly dependent on your state requirements as well as the agency's requirements.  I would recommend speaking with a local adoption agency to see what they recommend.  There may be certain things that you can begin working on now, but you may not be able to sign any of the documentation until you are 21.  An adoption agency would be able to provide you with the best answer.

Good luck.

Answer 2

My agency requires at least 1 spouse to be 25 or older. Also most agencies require a minimum number of years to be married. Mine was 3 years.

Answer 3

Agencies and social services departments also have requirements for the minimum difference in the ages of the adoptive parent and the adoptee.  I am sure that it is greater than 8 years in most places.

Answer 4

By the time you get your classes done and other paperwork you should be 21 anyways. Some states/agencies say you either must be single or married or divorced for 2 years before adopting and some (I know Wisconsin says) you have to be 15 years.... older.... than the child you adopt.

Answer 5

I really do not know the answer to your question, but after seeing the negative answers I have to comment.  Good for you for deciding on an older child, who without someone like you would be stuck in the revolving door of the foster care system.  Most people who say they are so "desperate" to be parents insist on newborns, so older children never get adopted.  I would start looking into it now if I were you.  Call some adoption agencies and ask your questions.  It can't hurt, right?

Answer 6

an adopted child, especiallya ge 12 when they have a mind of their own already, may be very difficult and super challenging for you and your husband, not to mention in a few years they will be in college without you having had the time to save for that.  I'd be curious as to 1) why you aren't having your own children as you hardly have given your chance to do that, and 2) why you aren't trying to adopt a baby instead.  Are you both happy about the idea of adopting?  Since you have hardly "lived" yet, and, these days marriages don't last that long, have you considered yourselves or do you have the best interests of the child in mind?  Or were you thinking that when you adopt that the state will be paying you money and you were thinking about additional income?  I'd advise against adopting a child unless you're childless and 35.

Answer 7

Here you would need to have already turned for 21 to start the process. However, if you have a relationship with the 12 year child and will soon be turning 21, they may let you begin the process. The best thing to do is to ask the agency that you are looking to work with. Each state has different laws and the age of the parents.

Answer 8

Start your classes if this is through foster care cause yes it takes time.  Have lots of patient and, good luck.  We adopted a 6 year old 7 years ago.  He is now 13 and is a wonderful kid.....Good luck

Answer 9

It depends on the country and the country rules as to weather or not you can start now. It would seem ok, if its in this country, check with the agency. If its a private adoption, then I don't see a problem. Good luck.

Answer 10

I too wonder why you as Young adults would want to adopt a teen ager?

It is almost like having your little brother or sister move in with you.

Is it a matter that one or both of you can't have children?

I would seriously re-consider adoption till you are a little older.  Closer to 28-30 when you've had more time to get to know each other and see if by then your views have changed at all.

I'm not trying to stop you from adopting, but as the Mom of one son. I know that I wouldn't want such young people caring for a teenager.

Good Luck with what you decide.