All i wanted was for my boyfriend to talk to me more is that to much to ask for???

Question

i had been dating this guy for a month and for the first 3 weeks he use to always call me we talked all the time and when he told me he'd call me back he always did even if he was really tired he would call to let me know he was gonna go to bed... things changed after that he stopped calling me and when i called him he'd answer and tell me he was with his friend and he'd call me back in a few minutes and he never did he did this for 3 days and i finally just got fed up with it so i called him and i told him that i wanted him to try and find time to call me and that i didn't have a problem with him spending time with his friends but he needed to find time for me as well i was very nice about the situation...well the next day he called me and he was kinda being a jackass so i got off the phone...for a week he didn't call me he wouldn't answer any of my phone calls..i called him today and he didn't answer so i called my friend and told her hey Johns not been calling me and he won't answer when i call so she called him and he answered..i was so upset i started crying..she told him that he needed to talk to me more...after that i talked to her and then i called john myself and hour later and he answered this time was different i wasn't to nice about the situation this time i felt i had a good reason to be angry and upset...i cried the whole time i was on the phone with him and i yelled at him and he was just a smartazz about and agreed with everything i said and he wasn't taking anything i said serious...i asked him if he still cared about me and he said he didn't know and he kept trying to get off the phone trying to run from the problem..i told him that if he got off the phone not to bother calling me i said this because i was angry and i was hoping that would make him listen to me but it didn't he said well fine bye...i was thinking about the whole situation afterwards and i just kept thinking did he do this on purpose so i would break up with him i was confused and i din't want things to end up like this so i called him back be cause i wanted to level things out and try to get it back the way it use to be because i odn';t like giving up on other pple i care about...well big mistake i guess because he told me he thought it was stupid that i told him not to call me back and i ended up calling him that really hurt me and he finally told me that he didn't know what he wanted and that he was tired of my complaining and thats why he stopped calling me...im really confused and heart broken and i don't know what to do i mean he told me he cared about me a week ago and now he doesn't know if he wants to be with me i feel like he's given up on me...is all of this my fault or is he just flipped out

i've tried so hard to make this work and he hasn't done anything

should i just stop trying too

pleas what should i do im confused and i need some good helpful advice and please don't be hateful i think i've been through enough today the last thing i need is an idiot on the internet being stupid

Answer 1

I understand were both you, and your boy friend are coming from. On one hand, keeping contact with your partner is key to a succesful relationship. However! Sometimes calling to much can damage it just as easily. I hope you two can work it out.

Answer 2

Definitely stop trying. It sounds like this guy liked you at first but then changed his mind. He prob didn't want to hurt you by breaking up with you and was confused. But you need to get over this. You sound pretty young and you will find someone who is more mature and treats you better. I'm sorry your hurt, it'll be ok. Don't call him, just leave it, if he talks to you, talk back but if he makes no contact then let it go.

Answer 3

Feel sorry for you. Kinda going through a similar thing with my girl except shes the one not apparently wanting to talk to me as much..

Anywho onto your problem. I'm sorry but I think he has made it pretty clear that he is psycho. I don't mean that in a poke fun way I mean that its kinda horrible to do what hes doing to you. I would call him one more time and let him know how much he is hurting you. If he says he doesn't care or if he acts like he doesn't then I wouldn't give the relationship much more of your time and would start to try to move on. No it's not your fault btw.. .he's just flipping out.

Answer 4

Don't blame this on yourself.

First of all i just wanna say, near the end you sounded a little clingy, i know you have  a right to be angy but once he hung up, you shouldn't have called him back.

I get he was being a jerk, but he was probably acting that way because he wanted to seem all big with his friends. Although when he heard you were upset he shouldn't have acted that way. Maybe he stopped calling because he didn't want to call you for every last detail, like going to bed. Also do you guys ever go out together, because you didn't mention it, well if you did you could have mentioned it them, when it was just him and you.

I don't think there is much more you can do now, but just don't call him back, wait until he contacts you. if he doesn't, you should ask yourself if he was really the right person for you...