Question:

Am I Insane? Eating, Sleeping, Exercise Problems.?

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I was a fat unhappy kid from elementary school to high school. I got to college my freshman year dropped fifty pounds in three months by eating a pop tart and half a sub a day. From sophomore year on I would probably work out two hours a day. I didn't eat right. I would go crazy about every calorie I consumed for all four years of college. I would over exercise. As a result my concentration would suck and I couldn't pay attention in class. As each semester would go on I would loose lots of weight and feel worse, ending up me getting worse and worse grades, my stress level going up and me barely making it through each semester. For some crazy reason I ended up graduating not before packing four years of credits into two, all while working out two hours a day if not more, not eating right, and obsessing about my weight. I never got drunk once in college, I never had s*x once in college, I didn't party once in college, I didn't even kiss a girl in college.

Every summer I would come home and work crazy hours till midnight, I would not sleep every other night, not exercise, or eat properly. By the end of each summer I was cranky, exhausted, and suicidal.

So I graduate from college, which I never thought I would do in a million years some kind of light went on. I stopped working out excessively and took up brazilian ju jitsu, I started partying, having fun with friends, and even drinking. I still maintained my crazy eating problem but not to such an insane extent of calorie counting and I also have huge sleeping problems. Some days I will sleep three hours, other days I will sleep fourteen hours. Over the winter I blacked out at a training class.

Currently some days I have no energy to do anything, I will be awake for like eight hours and spend a few hours at my job staring at the wall or acting like a nut job (thank god I own the business or I would get fired). I have punched wholes in the walls and cried when I came home.

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  1. Its seems like even though you have lost wait and gained confidence in yourself your still not happy with who you are inside, very insecure. I would say that you should see a therapist to deal with your inner self-esteem. Once you have dealt with the hurt in your past of being a fat little teased kid you will accept the man you have become.

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