Am I a bad friend for saying I'd buy this shirt for my friend but actually buy it for myself?

Question

I was looking online and found this shirt that i just KNEW my friend would love. so i showed it to her and she was like I LOVE IT. and i was like "i'm going shopping tomorrow, you want me to buy it for you?" she was like "YES PLEASE" and i was like "haha okay"...then 5 minutes later i told her "wait, i kinda like it too...can i buy one too?" she was like "sure"

soo i went shopping with a different friend and we saw the shirt. i got a good size for me and liked it. and there were extra shirts with a good size i could buy for my friend. except at that time i really didn't want my other friend to have it since i would wear it too. i asked the friend with me "should i buy it for her? i kinda dont want her to have the same shirt as me now..." my friend was like "nah if you dont want her to have it, then buy it just for yourself" so i listened and agreed and was like "okay..." i felt guilty the whole day but also felt kind of relieved that she wouldn't wear the same shirt as me.

so now i have the shirt and then on aim, i lied and said "SORRY they had one small size and the rest were medium, extra large, large". and she was like "OMG THANK YOU SO MUCH" and i was like..."uhh..." and she got the message that i bought it for myself. she didn't respond in like 10 minutes. and then she was like "oh darn..." so i tried changing the subject or mentioned she could buy it online or try going to the store because they might have restocked because i felt really bad.

so...did I do the wrong thing by not buying the shirt for her? [i didn't PROMISE i would buy it but i said i would] or did i do okay and its reasonable for me to not want her to have the same shirt as me?

Thanks for answering, i vote best answer, please don't be mean O_O

Answer 1

I think deep down you know you've hurt her and I can understand her being a little peeved...... But at the end of the day it is just a top and not worth losing a friendship over.

I'd say sorry for hurting her and try to remember how this time turned out if you want to buy something for a friend in future.

It's easy to get caught up in the excitement of the moment with friends and times like these can be times to learn, about ourselves and our friends.

Answer 2

For the future never tell someone else you will buy them something. Next time invite her to go shopping and tell her to bring money to get it her self. But secondly why does it matter if you two wear the same shirt? so 1 friend doesnt have it, think of all the other people in the school who do? thats a stupid excuse for not getting her one. But its your money and you don't have to buy them anything. So next time don't tell them you will.

Answer 3

Yes, you done wrong.

But you know that.

I can't believe how big a deal you're making of this, just give her the shirt and say you're sorry!

Answer 4

I wouldve done the same thing, but I know and have been told that I'm super selfish

Answer 5

I would have bought her the shirt, and bought me a different one that was better.

I mean,

it's not like as bad as if it was like her birthday, but it would be nice to do.

If she stays mad at you,

then maybe you should go back and buy her another shirt or something.

Answer 6

Ok so I'm going to try not to sound nasty about this when i answer ur question but whats the big deal about a friend having the same shirt as you? Its a shirt that she said she loved and u said u would buy for her. Something that u both like jus shows that u two are good friends. Me and my friends have some clothes that are the same since we shop together a lot, and we dont see it as a bad thing. We look at it as something that binds us closer together. And u guys dont have to wear the shirt on the same day as each other, and if it happens so what, the store sells shirt to complete strangers who might jus wear it the same day u do.

And really put yourself in her shoes, your friend shows u a shirt asks u if u like it, says she'll pick one up for u then decides to change her mind and only gets one for herself.

So yea i think u made a bad move there but u could always apologize and go get the shirt that u said u would get for her from the beginning.

Answer 7

It was partly your fault, you were the one who brought up the shirt and showed it to her, you even told her yourself you'd buy it for her, (actually you asked her if you could buy it). She, in her part was all excited and thnakful for you, but she shouldn't have gotten her hopes up.

In all, maybe next time you decide to buy something for a friend, tell her/him that it's not going to a full guarantee.

Answer 8

Hahah! of course your not a bad friend.. to be honest im sure we've all done it at least once before ..

It makes a change for people to put themselves first, if she wants the shirt that bad she'll go to the store or like you said.. buy it online (:

So dont fear! shes still gonna be you friend :)

x

Answer 9

not to be mean or something, but i think ur friend is somewhat like disappointed or something..in the first place, i guess you changed your course when you saw the shirt...and y did you lie to your friend?and wat's wrong with sharing the same shirt together?ur friends right? you could've picked the different color instead...not to be mean or something, but i think that was kinda selfish..wat if ur friend found out the truth? remember that cheating is the brother of lying...when you cheat (in any form)  to someone, lying comes after it...

Answer 10

i mean if i was put in that situation i wouldnt want my friend to have the same one but maybe a different color but i wouldnt wanna waste my money on it unless its her bday but maybe it wudnt be her size so she should be with you if she wants a shirt

Answer 11

it will be okay.

theres bigger things in life than t-shirts :)

im sure your friend will forgive you

maybe you could give you the t-shirt or something to make it up to her.

good luck. X

Answer 12

hahaa. no, dont worry about it. as long as you dont brag about it or anything.. she will forgive you. :]

Answer 13

I just have to say

You are SO lucky

THis is the biggest thing in your life you have to be worried about

Congratulations:)