Am I being taken for granted?

Question

I share a apartment with two really good friends. They both work and since I am home most of the time they always expect me to do the cleaning. I am constantly doing the dishes on a daily basis, buying groceries, vacuuming and dropping off/picking up their dry cleaning (sometimes even paying for it). I wouldn't at all mind doing all this stuff if they at least could show some kind of appreciation. They never give/do anything in return. One is a good cook and just because he might cook once in a month he thinks he never has to lift a finger on anything else. The other one works at a top finance company and he thinks since he has a busy/stressful job he doesn't have to do anything either.

Answer 1

When you actually begin to think and wonder if you are being taken for granted, chances are, that your worries are true.n Speak up about it! Tell them that you respect that they have really busy lives, but it wouldn't hurt if they helped around a bit! You are not a housemaid. If they were really your friends, they will understand. I know this sounds kid-ish, but set up a chore list! So-and-so will cook on Mondays-Wednesdays. You will cook on Thursdays-Saturdays. And on Sundays, you guys can go out to eat together, which is paid by the other person. And so on for days of picking up the dry cleaning, doing dishes, vacuuming, etc... Call them and ask if they can pick up [grocery item] on their way from work. Meanwhile, try find a job or something else that gets you out of the house. That way, your friends don't have a reason to say that you have to do all the housework. Make sure that the lazy bums do their share of work. Good luck!  

Answer 2

Well everyone has to pitch in when your living together like that.

If this continues AND still bothers you, you need to take action.

It's true that people are tired when they come home from their jobs, but it gives no right to not help with simple home chores.  No appreciation... da*n that p*sses me off more than anything.  Don't you agree?

~ dramaqueen

Answer 3

Are you crazy !!What are you there parent.They can get their own damm dry cleaning.Talk about being taken advantage of.They can get their own groceries and they should do their own cooking.You need a hobby outside of your home seriously.Get out of that stressful enviroment before you no longer enjoy living there.

Answer 4

you need to split the costs and cleaning. It's not like you're paying any less for he apartment then they are - why should you clean up after THEIR messes? you're TOTALLY being taken advantage of.

Answer 5

If you pay your own rent and bills, then you should not be doing all this for them and they are taking you for granted, but you are allowing them to do this. Learn to say "NO" and learn to ask them to do some things. Stop being a pushover and the nice guy. They will keep doing this as long as you keep allowing them to. Now if you pay nothing and they pay for you, well then possibly you should be earning your keep.

Answer 6

let them know how you feel and then try to plan out a schedule so that you aren't doing all the work. Maybe they can pick up the dry cleaning on the way home from work or do the dishes every other day. You could have it be where you all alternate doing the work every week...like say one week you do the dishes then the other guy does them and the third week the third guy does them. Ask them if they can try to cook more often because you think it would be cool to try everybody favorites and then you can just have everybody get like a few recipes that you all like and make them every now and then that way you all get what you like! Hope this helped!

Answer 7

Yes you are being taken for granted. Have a group meeting in the house and discuss how you feel, dont keep it locked up! If they stay the same then stop doing thier dirty work till they see ur serious but if it carries on or gets work, find sumwhere else to live hun

:] x

Answer 8

everyone should partake in household duties and chores. but the question is do you work? if you dont work than you should definitely be in charge of maintaining the house - in placement of rent money. in essense-they dont need to thank you for doing it but they shouldnt purposely leave things around so that you can clean it. and the good cook should be the one cookin right?? lol thats not a hard task-especially if youre the one cleanin the dishes!

Answer 9

NO this is a bunch of bullshit. You clean YOUR dishes, you clean YOUR room, you pick up YOUR dry cleaning,..and pay for YOUR own,.....you cook for YOURSELF, and thats about it. If you want to clean the house once a week then fine, but this rediculous. You are being taken advantage of, and dont let them get away with this. being nice is one thing,....letting them walk all over you is another.