Am I being to harsh on my soon to be ex?

Question

My husband moved out and took some things that he shouldn't have and then made a comment about me on his my space and now he has the nerve to ask for some of his things out of the house, but I told him no. He has taken advantage of my kindness and I am sick of it. He is the one that wants this divorce and I am the one handling it with dignity. Should I let him have what he wants or wait until we go to mediation?

Answer 1

Just give the man his things and move on with your life.

The longer you hold out and it goes into mediation, the more miserable you become...

Is it worth it??

Answer 2

He don't want u so give him his sh**t!  Let it be and move on ma..

Answer 3

if you don't let him have his stuff he could go to the COPS/ police to escort him on the premises to remove hes property. its not nice to keep hes belongings. how would you feel if he did this to you>???  

Answer 4

If it were his personal things I'd take the high road and give it to him, but if he's taking advantage of your kindness it may be best to not talk w/him and let it get settled legally. Trust my my ex did me in! One bankruptcy and maxed credit card, name in paper for delinquent property taxes, utility bills left, fraud, etc later and I'm alive, but boy I'd do it differently if I had it to do all over again. It sucks!

Answer 5

Dont hang on to his stuff just to be difficult. The sooner you are rid of his c**p, you are rid of him, too.

Answer 6

Give him his stuff.  If you are taking the high road, then keep on taking it and give him his things.

Answer 7

It would be a good thing to give him back his stuff seeing that things could get messy if those things are originally his belongings.

Answer 8

Just give his things to him.

I don't understand why people have to make more drama. A divorce is stressful enough without the pettiness. I understand that he hurt you but really...this isn't 2nd grade. Give him the stuff and start making this as stressless as you can on yourself. Then when it's finally over move on.

Answer 9

Be the better person here and let him have his stuff.  Do make documentation of the c**p he is pulling so that when you go to mediation it will be better for you.

Answer 10

yes give him the things that he want tell him that you need a list of the items and make sure that he gets everything that he wants at that time becuase there will be no more trips to get items that he left. But then again wait for mediataion because he has somethings that don't belong to him

Answer 11

Lori,

If the things are really, truly his, or they are items you don't care about, then I would set them outside, and tell him to come and get them.  That will prove you are the better person, and this also looks good to the courts/mediators.  If they are items in question, or things you both want, I would leave them be and let the court/mediator settle things.  Unfortunately, women often end up in poverty after divorce, so make sure you are taking care of yourself.  

Answer 12

Dignity=getting on a public message board and complaining that your no good soon to be ex husband took something that the both of you once owned and now wants some of his "other stuff" back that you have no use for anyway.Then you want him to suffer the until mediation.

UHHHH aren't you the one still in the house???? Aren't;t you sick of it?

Uhh, you guys are trading jabs to each other on My Space?

I see a whole lot of dignity there!!!

Answer 13

Definatly wait until you go see the mediator. Trust me you give him this stuff now he'll just want more in the future, especially if he's selfish. So just wait.

Answer 14

First, I think you should not even go to his MYSPACE page. That is only going to make you more upset with who leaves him comments, the girls, what he says, etc.. Why do that to yourself?

Second, it depends on what he took that he shouldn't have taken?

And it depends on what he wants back? Like if he wants something that belongs to him and is clearly his .. yes return it.

If he has taken advantage of your kindness, then, simply don't be kind to him anymore.

Or you could just wait.

He wants a divorce. Give him what he wants. If he doesn't want to try there is nothing you can do. "Don't keep anybody that doesn't want to be kept"

Unless you BOTH love each other enough to try and work your issues out..

I mean, you two did say FOR BETTER OR WORSE...

:)