Am I evil? Can you please help me?

Question

Can you help me? I need to know something ok?

Sometimes I feel like there is something evil in me.

It comes out very rarely - but when it does - it seems like I breath more like an animal. I have an evil look in my eyes and I feel so much rage in that moment.

Question: I had a dream last night where the lady who plays the exorcist's mother. Only in my dream she was my mother and walking towards me. I felt this evil feeling in my dream - like it wanted my soul but I am a devoted Christian.

I kind of feel a pull from both sides - esp. in my dreams.

Last night was the weirdest. I was walking on this dirt road all alone - grey sky - and this truck was coming towards me. II felt so lonely and that moment felt so ominous. The wind was blowing hard in that dream and that truck coming toward me represented something evil. I just felt like I was evil and that scene just reminded me of that "pull". Then I had my next dream where that lady was my mother and wanting me to be her evil child.

I woke up freaked out and scared.

What do you honestly think? What is with that dream man?

It happened again today. My worst day today. I felt that thing in me. Breathing weird and feeling rage again. People can sense it and feel it - so they look at you strange - which makes me hate them even more. It is a strong thing that makes me a mean person. Like I laughed today cause I wanted to throw my drink at a truck driving by - in that moment I felt compelled to do it and laugh. But I didn't.

I don't know what to do sometimes as it takes over me and is so strong. I never do anything though.

My teacher told me when I was young I had no Conscience.

Then my friend (a doctor) said if someone shaved my head they would find 3 digits on it. Then my Auntie's friend called me a devil one time when she was mad at me.

Let me know ok.

Answer 1

That thing you feel rage from is your own spirit.  It's what you were meant to be, but the only reason it feels evil is because you don't understand it.  Any unknown, strange feeling is going to cause apprehension and fear.  People try to bury that under dismissals, and claiming it's "just" their imagination...AND IT IS!!!  And their imagination is doing exactly what it's supposed to do -- injecting things into our realities to wake us up to the fact that we're more than just flesh and blood.

What we were meant to be forever is durable, fun, sexual, and everlasting...and so drastically different from what we are now, that if we saw it all at once, we might think it was evil.  But rest assured, you're going to become that "thing" that tries to break through your human shell with rage...and you'll love it so much you won't dream of thinking to be anything else.

Damaeus

Answer 2

They're called emotions...I suggest you don't give into them since they are something that have held the human race back for years. Rage is a very deep thing to feel though and what I would say you should do is find something to unleash that rage on..ofcourse something non-living, Like a punching bag or simply just a pillow. and if you can, try not to show this rage, it might be hard at first but it gets easy after a while. And no, you're not evil just because you feel anger and because you have these weird dreams, everyone has dreams that scare them sometime in their life.

Answer 3

Darlin they are pullin your chain you are not possessed you are not evil you are trying to make yourself extra special and you are already Praise God and do not open those doors.then you have nothing to worryabout  so god bless and have a nice life.

Answer 4

Just sounds like the pressures of life is taking a toll on you, relax, you are not evil. Just pray for peace and self control, you'll be fine!! And if any one tells you you're evil, they are just letting the devil speak through them!!  

Answer 5

I don't think of many people as truly evil (very few are). I think most people fall into a gray area. People are both good and bad and you choose what you want to be. Even after you do that, the bad just doesn't go away. You have to fight it everyday.

You say you're a Christian, so definitely pray about this. Also have you read Romans 7 13:25 ? It's one of my favorite verses, read it.

You are not alone. One time I got really mad at my mom, like livid, a lost control completely, and when she bent over in front of me, I had a thought like your truck driving one, only I acted. I'll never forgive myself. She's okay, but I still can't believe I did that (I stuck my hands like claws into her back). *shudders*.

What I really wonder is what's wrong with your teacher and your aunt? They shouldn't say stuff like that to you, and about your friend, are you sure (s)he wasn't kidding?

Good luck with everything and remember, everyone is tested, no ones pure,  just make sure you stick with the light and you'll be fine.

Answer 6

Best Advice: Get saved.

Answer 7

your not evil maybe in one of past life you where but what happened was you got another chance to do something good change yourself for what past mistakes you made when ever you start to feel that feeling of fear you need to prey our father then you need to stay focus on your goal and don't let the fear over come your faith  

Answer 8

How long have you been having these feelings of rage, altered breathing patterns, and horrible dreams?  And the voice inside trying to get you to do things you normally wouldn't do?

I want to suggest 2 things.  They might actually BOTH be true.

(1)  You are under spiritual attack by the devil who is wanting to torment you and distress you to keep you from growing strong in your faith in God.

(2)  You have a physical illness.  Get a good physical checkup.  Ask to have your thyroid tested, blood sugar, etc.  I know from experience a thyroid that is out of control can do VERY weird things to you.  

OR, it could just be that illness makes you more vulnerable to the devil's attack on you.

So, pray and ask Jesus to conquer this evil that is attacking you.  Pray before you go to sleep, and whenever you feel this rage coming on.  But DO go to the doctor.  It could be something quite simple that medication can treat.

Also, I'm going to ask two very wise friends of mine to check in on you and read your dream, pray for you, and offer their thoughts if God leads them to do so.  They are named "Jynx of the Tea Leaves" and "Heartablaze".  

I pray you get the spiritual and/or physical healing you need, plus some peaceful sleep as well.

God bless you,

Fairelight

Answer 9

i Think you are trying too much to be a good person, Life is balance. you can never be too good nor too bad, its an instinct that for every thoughts of goodness you thought of badness.

I bet you're a teenager. who always have a headache

Don't listen to what people says, nobody understands you the way how you understand yourself. Your job is to understand yourself.

Dream is the result of stress especially in teenage year

Try to express your thoughts, don't keep secrets. be true to yourself. "you only do such things bec. you need to do it." for your health sake.

your brain will work extra holding too much information. result in too much high blood flow rate-headache.

Answer 10

No, you are not evil, it is call "Rage", and it is one of humans base emotion.

And we all have it, and one time or the other, it exploded when we least wanted it. You should stop the superstitious thinking that you are evil, because, you control your own destiny, to either be good or bad.

One sign of maturity is to know ones' own problem, and then learn to control the less desired emotions.

Only Charlatan will used the term "Evil" on someone, and their main goal is just extract money from people, pay them no mind. There is no evil other than in ones' own negative emotions.