Am I just a horrible person?? Details inside...?

Question

My mom used to work with this lady who needed someone to let out her dog during the day when she was at work. She asked me to do this around the beginning of the summer and I was okay with it. I was bored and figured what the heck. That led to going to stores to pick some things up. That led to feeding the dog and taking out the trash. And more. I was okay with that too because I had the time and figured I might as well do something good with my time. The lady couldn't do this stuff herself because of cancer and the treatment. I even stayed at her house twice to take care of her dog and keep the dog company while she was in the hospital for surgery. It was about a week both times.

But now she says she can do something one day and not the next. She says she eats one particular thing everyday for breakfast and is out so I go to the grocery store for one measly thing. Then she says she doesn't eat it every day. She asks for two or three days worth of food one day and asks me to go again when she needs something else.

This is really really irritating to me. When I shop for myself I get two weeks worth of items at least - I hate shopping. When I mention getting more stuff she declines. And I'm broke. Bored basically means unemployed right now. She has given me some money, but I don't know if it covers gas and the food I bought for the dog while she was in the hospital, etc. I thought for awhile that she's in a hard place and I let things slide, but now I'm just fed up.

My mom is super angry with me. She says it's really S****y of me to not help someone in her place. I don't entirely disagree but I can only do so much. And I didn't see her going over there today.

So about me being a really horrible person ... she had/has cancer. Chemo/radiation, two surgeries and the last one was recent. Can't say I really understand exactly how bad her situation is because asking makes me uncomfortable. My mom says she's doing really bad, but to be quite frank, I don't ever believe what she says. She tends to mis-relay information often.

Am I just a horrible person??

Answer 1

I am not to judge but according to what you wrote and the detail of information I would have to say that you are at least concerned for this person.   If you were horrible you would not even be asking.  

I think that you believe that you should do more but one person can only help to a certain point.  

I like to help people and sometimes others "outside the loop" think I should do more or be more persistent but I can only spend a certain amount  of time helping one person

Answer 2

no be assured that facts are the highest truths if she has facts against her which you have you are right and so you are

P.S.

say are you a horrible person mean you are trying to be a person and asking if your bad at it thus you are not a person you should have asked am i a bad because of this

Answer 3

Everybody came across this thing please try  learn to say NO with a frankly manner .Always have keep confidence to urself . YES is always not the right answer to say ...it sometimes effect a lot to our personallity ..simphathy is a weapon..inorder to  survice this world ..conditional YES should be keep rearly.

Answer 4

I don't think any of that make you a horrible person hun,

if anything it makes you a good person because you've taken the time to help this women out.

Perhaps you have been left to do more than you can handle and that's why you're starting to feel fed up. Explain to your mother that you are fed up and wouldn't mind maybe a little help from her [if she has the time]

I'm sure the women is very thankful for what you are doing, even if she doesn't quite show it. Perhaps your feeling like you are taking more than you can handle. Or maybe this women is taking a little advantage of your help.

Either way talk to your mother and sort out this situatuion but i can assure you , you are not a horrible person.

I think you're a pretty good person for helping out, even if you don't really want to.

Take care x

Answer 5

no, no one would like to feel like they are getting used and that is how you are feeling right now.  You feel bad about feeling this way and you have been helping her for quite some time, both of those go to show you that you are infact a very good person.  

The woman seems to be going through a very hard time and she is going through it all by herself, all she has is her dog and now she can't even take care of her animal.  So as bad, and used as you are feeling that is most likely how lonely she is feeling.  She probably is asking you to do these things just to get you to come over her house or to feel like she can give you something to do to keep occupied.  I would tell you to just talk to her, do it softly as not to blow her off but tell her how you feel.  I'm sure she doesn't want you to feel this way.  Same with your mom.

Hopefully everything works out for the best.  Good luck.