Am I mean or what? I keep the neighbor kids balls that come over the fence.?

Question

the 8 yr old boy plays in his backyard next to us. His balls( soccer, basketball, football, ect), are found in my yard over a seven foot high wood fence. My wife has intricate decorations and potted plants decorating our yard, many are one of a kind . The balls coming over the fence have broken a couple of the pots and damaged some of her plants( her main hobby). We use to return the balls, but they keep coming over the fence, so now we don't return them,just throw them in the trash, and hope he runs out soon. Are we bad people?

Answer 1

I don't think you are bad people or mean, but I do think you are not being  as reasonable or nice as you could be.

This is an 8-year-old boy.  He has been acting immaturely but that's because he is a child.  If you have not made the effort to talk to his parents or guardians about this, you are not being fair to the boy.  (It would be nice to talk to the boy first, but kids that age often do not understand right vs. wrong, action vs. consequence.)

If you have had a serious talk with his parents/guardians and the boy continues to disrespect your property, then keeping the balls that came into your yard is a reasonable response.

Answer 2

It can get on your nerves if there is a never ending stream of things sailing over the fence and breaking up your garden. Return at least some of them in the interest of peace.

Answer 3

Somehow the words "I discussed it with the child's parents..." didn't appear in this explanation.

I reserve my judgment until you explain that critical omission.

Answer 4

Yeah that's mean... you're not bad people though

when I was little my neighbor did that to my friends and I.

It's just an accident.. but maybe if you talked to them and told them it's been breaking pottery, they might be a bit more careful?

Answer 5

I think you're Awesome, good for you!

Answer 6

No. And if the kid comes in your yard to get them then you should throw him out.

Answer 7

No, you are not bad people. Bad people would throw the broken pots at the 8 yr. old.

Answer 8

Yep, you're pretty much a d**k.

Get over yourself, and "the manor"!

Answer 9

In my opinion, assuming you tell them to stop, once is an accident, twice is forgivable, three times is annoying.  Anything after that, and those balls are never seen again.

The little girl behind me intentionally throws things over my fence.  I've had to replace a lawnmower because of an item I didn't see in the grass until it was too late.  At this point, anything I find goes straight in the trash even if she's standing their watching me.

Answer 10

Nope you aren't bad people! I would be sooo pissed off if a neighboor's kid broke a one of a kind item especially if it happened more than once! After the first time I think I'd ask the parents to reimburse me for the damaged good! AND in the beginning you returned the balls and it seems like the weren't at all grateful!  I would pop the balls tho so that they couldn't just go back in your trash can and take them out. haha parents seriously need to take more responsibility for their children and their children's actions! If i had a child and they were destroying other people property over and over again i'd be soo embarrassed! remember people your children are a reflection of youself!

Answer 11

i think perhaps a visit to his parents with a bill for damages might help. more power to you

Answer 12

Yes, he's a little kid not a monster. Have you tried talking with his parents? If you need to , move the pots. You have probably made him want to do it more. Thats how kids are.

Answer 13

I'm agreeing with the people who said you should talk to the parents, especially since it appears that every time he loses a ball, they buy him a new one.

Answer 14

You could have been kind enough give him a warning.

Answer 15

No, but I suggest walking over and explaining to his parents that he is ruining your plants, and ask if they could have him be a little more careful.

Answer 16

Your not bad people, but there are better ways of dealing with this situation. First of all you should have talked with the kid's parents to get him to be more cautious and to stop. It seems weird if the kid doesn't come over to retrieve his ball so he might just not care. I think you should talk to their family.

Answer 17

no my family does the same thing ....except instead of just balls it all kinds of toys and we don't want our dogs to get eat then and get choked and etc

Answer 18

Nice to see that good neighbourly spirit's

are up !! Well I'm sorry but this boy's main

hobby is kicking a ball - that's what little boys do  !!!!

He's not doing it out of spite - but you gain

enjoyment from keeping the balls from him -

which IS out of spite - which does make you

bad role models.

You deserve nothing less than an ASBO !!!

(Anti social behaviour order) for THEFT

if nothing else.

You should move - away from neighbours !!!!!

The Desert would be the perfect place.

You may want to do this some time soon -

as I have just donated the boy a life time

supply of golf balls - the ones that really will

pi*s you orfffff !!!!!!!!

Answer 19

I wish you were my neighbor.......I hate it when I tell the kids and grandkids that the balls are gone if they kick them over the fence.......then some nice, sweet, little old neighbor lady will return them and make a liar out of me............

Answer 20

That is freaken hilarious! Hey if it falls in your yard and hits one of your delicate items, I do not blame you for not returning those balls! In the beginning, I would also but after awhile it would get on my nerves too.

Answer 21

LOL!!  You're my kind of people!

Since you used to return the balls, they apparently didn't appreciate the effort since they continue to allow their son to keep at it.

I would at least let them know, while returning a ball one last time, that this has damaged your property and could they make an effort to keep the balls in their own yard or out of yours from now on.

But keeping them is also an option.

||edit||  I LOVE boise' answer......LOL

Answer 22

Yep, someday someone will throw your balls out

Answer 23

Let the air out of them and toss them back over the fence :)

Answer 24

Go over to neighbor and say they can buy the balls back. Kid is damaging your yard. Price for each ball is $$.

Answer 25

crotchety old coots.

Answer 26

No your not bad people but instead of keeping the balls you need to go over and tell them that they are ruining your wives plants and its rude and 2 stop.

Answer 27

yes

Answer 28

yahh wtf? just tell him dont do it again! evey think of tht, mean nieghbor? dont keep his balls hes playing with! wtf is wrong with u, u sound like a bitter old man.

Answer 29

not at all!! I would do the same......but my ex did call me mean everyday for the last year of the relationship lol

Answer 30

When I first read your question I thought, wow this guys a jerk. "Kids will be kids" if you will.  And then I thought about it and reread your question.  I thought he's right!  No, I don't think your mean at all.  You've previously returned numerous balls to your neighbor so mom & dad are "aware" the boy is doing this.  Your personal property has been destroyed/damaged.  One item which was irreplacable. I say keep throwing them in the trash.  At some point you have to say enough is enough.  Looks like you've done that, good for you! P.S. Sorry about the jerk part earlier.  I stand corrected.