Am I naive to think my husband and I will have s*x everyday?

Question

I'll be married in a couple of months and my fiance and I are both virgins. I've gathered that on average newly married couples have s*x between 3-4 times a week. Why not everyday, am I missing something???

Answer 1

most people dont keep up the everyday s*x thing...i would love it more, but my husband works alot, and he is tired....

Answer 2

no your not naive to think that!

Answer 3

when you first get married you want to do it all the time! Then after the full time jobs kick in you just get tired and just don't have the energy! When your ttc its a different story! You will want to do it everyday!!! Good luck to youuuu!!!

Answer 4

Becuase life is more than just s*x.

I'd say 3-4 times a week is a LOT more than I expected.

Answer 5

TOTALLY depends on the couple.  There is this huge myth that there's an average.  If you fall above it you're awesome & s**y.  If you fall below it you're pathetic & someone's cheating.  Just BS.

You do what you want when you want as long as both people agree.  You do what fits with your schedule, you do what fits your interests.  There are plenty of married of couples that don't have s*x very often & are still very happy.  There are couples that focus so much on s*x they forget to actually speak to each other.

Answer 6

YES  you and anyone who answers otherwise are VERY naive..

   The stress of everyday problems and lifes struggles will out weight the urge to have s*x, As you mature you will realize that s*x isn't as important in a marriage as you read in romance novels. Don't get me wrong It has its place in a marriage but other things begin to take priority over your personal satisfaction....  

Answer 7

You can have s*x every day, and chances are that you will, during the first weeks of your marriage.   But there will be times when one of you or both will not want to have s*x.  For example, during your pregnancy or after having a baby, when you are sick, when you are really tired from work, etc

Answer 8

it will be new to you, so yeah, you will want to do it several times a day. i have been having s*x for 15 years. i'm not saying i don't love having s*x with my husband, i'm just saying the toy isn't new anymore.

Answer 9

If you want it, you'll get it.  Make it happen!

Answer 10

While it would be lovely to have the time and energy to do it every day, it just doesn't happen. My husband and I have very busy lives and we don't always have the time for s*x or the energy. Everyone is different, though, so you'll find what works best for you.

Answer 11

you will start out everyday all hot and heavy.. everyone does.

then reality sets in and you don't have the time and energy to do it everyday. so you  end up  with it 3-4 times a week and depending on your jobs and the shifts you work  it may be less.. don't compare your relationship to others because what  works for you may not work for them.  

Answer 12

Yes you are.  Prepare yourself to be dissappointed.

Answer 13

What is normal for everyone else, may not be normal for you. When you are first married, you will have s*x a lot, but things will calm down and you won't have it as often. Remember some times you will have a ruff day at work, you are upset about something and just not in the mood that day or you and your spouse got in an argument or one of you are sick or you are on your period. s*x is an important part of marriage, but like I said it's "part" of a marriage, it's not everything. Who wants to think that you must have s*x every night, before you can go to sleep? s*x is a desire, not something you do as a routine. Lock the doors, take a shower, brush my teeth, have s*x, then go to sleep. Boring!!!!!!!

If you are both virgins, I suggest you get some books on s*x and how to please each other. It's pretty hard to have a good sexual relationship when neither one of you, know what pleases you or your partner.

Answer 14

We have been together 10 years, married for 8 and in general we STILL have s*x everyday at least once, many days more than once.  And we are not teenagers (51 and 42) and have 4 children. We have never missed a beat.  The only time we do not have s*x is if one of us is ill.  In ten years the longest we have gone without is 4 days when I was hospitalized.  She goes with me on business trips and we have not spent a night apart since we were married.

EDIT  If you are "too busy" to have s*x every day it is because you are too busy.  s*x is very important to a marriage.  It is a sexual relationship.  It will be the glue that holds all else together.  It is supremely important!  I might add that in 8 years living and sleeping together EVERY night (my wife slept IN my bed at the hospital and held me all night) we have NEVER had an argument!  How can I argue with the woman that makes love to me every day?  You are getting married...make your husband number 1, and if he makes you number 1 you will have a long marriage.  Let your work (jobs away from family) take priority and you are doomed!

Good jobs, even in a recession, are 10,000 times easier to find than a good wife (or husband).  Get your head on straight and make your family the priority and your source of pleasure and you will always be happy.  My job takes me to Europe often, 7 times since January of this year, and my wife always goes.  If she cannot go, I do not go.  If my company has a problem with that, they can kiss my a s s !!!!!  They get to buy her plane ticket too!  I have told them, "You want to send me halfway 'round the world, my wife goes with me, deal with it, pay for it, or let's part company now"  Simple as that.  There is no "choice" about it.  I am married, I sleep with my wife.  I eat dinner with my wife every night.  If the company wants to interruot my dinner with a business meeting, she goes with.  I do not ask.  She comes.  If they don't like it, they can kiss my a s s !!!!!!  She is number 1 for me and I told her when we got married I would be with her for dinner every night.

My wife is a stay at home mom, very busy.  She has a tough job and goes to college courses, horseback riding lessons, swimming lessons, etc. and always has energy for s*x.  She always looks great when I come home from work, because she makes me and our marriage priority.  When I am coming home, she will stop her work and get cleaned up, made up, and look great when she meets me with a kiss.  It is time for work to stop for the day.  I do not bring my work home with me.  Whatever she didn't finish today, she can finish tomorrow, it will be there waiting.  My job is the same, tomorrow is another day, now is time for family and wife.  

Make it a priority, you will be happy.

Answer 15

You will soon be posting that once a week is all your doing it and wondering whats up..Thats just part of it. Marriage is MUCH more than just bumping uglies, the sooner you learn that the better.

Answer 16

Just go with the flow. Perhaps you will not have the energy to go at it everyday, or perhaps he will not. Don't plan this type of behavior, it is something that just happens to establish itself. Good luck with common sense.  

Answer 17

each person is different, and each couple is different.  what will happen will depend on what you and your new husband decide.  also, keep in mind that after working all day, taking care of house chores and running errands, you will be tired at the end of the day.  you may not always want to have s*x.  or, you may find that it is something special to look forward to at the end of the day.  you may want to make time for it, no matter how you feel.  

I will tell you that, even though I am not married, once my long-time boyfriend and I started having s*x, we had s*x every day for about the first two years except for when my cycle was going.  even now, there isn't many times when we don't make the time between running errands and taking care of kids.  it's what we want, we both enjoy it, and it's important to us that we have that special time to bond.  every couple is different, and it does wane after a while, but it doesn't completely go away.  and it's important to find a common ground, something you can agree on.  (and most of the time, but not all, it's because the woman doesn't want or need s*x every day.  you may find that your new husband wants it more than that for a while.)

Answer 18

Everyday works for us, just try it and tell your hubby that's the way you like it.

Answer 19

It just depends on what you and your fiance want.  If you want it everyday than go for it!

Answer 20

If you have the time and energy everyday then go for, but the truth is.  Once your married you become so busy (especially after children) and lose the time and when you have time you just want to go to sleep.  But until kids you'll do good with everyday.  Some months we can go everyday, but most we get at least 3 days a week in (well not at the current time since he is away).