Am I pushing my preschool girl to do more?

Question

My daughter goes a montessori school ( Full time). but i generally bring her back by 3-4...after her nap at school. She is very good in Math. She can count till 30 and have also understood the concept of adding. I generally sit with her every day for 30 min to 1 hr to teach her some basic. She is very interested in Math. She loves to be read to her different stories. Just few days back one of my friends was saying that i am pushing her a lot. She is only 3 1/2 and need not study at all. I was trying to tell her that i am not forcing her...but she wants to do math and like to solve puzzles...so i am making it structured by sitting with her every day for 30 minutes to 1hr. But what she said is still in the back of my mind....Am i pushing her a lot. She writes 1-20 by herself( not on a trace). I don't ask her to write at all. I had read that writing skill comes only after the age fo 4...but she prefers writing. Can you please tell me if what i am doing is fine or is it too much for her.

Answer 1

as long as your daughter does not mind this and loves learning where is she being pushed. also be sure to have fun/imaginary time by playing dress-up or maybe have her her jump rope with you. You can make learning fun by tell her to count the number of times you can jump and she can jump and add those numbers together. Also ger her involved with the community by having her join a play get together group w/her friends from school. by doing this you can teach her that learning is important but that you can also have fun while learning, esp. when your 3 years old. that way you do not have to lighten the learning load just be creative, imagine and have fun with the learning instead of everything being all standard. have fun!

Answer 2

I think if it's something your daughter enjoys, what your doing is not necessarily "wrong," but there may be a better way to go about doing it.

Instead of making it study time and sitting with her specifically for school work, maybe find some games which incorporate the basics of math or something that might challenge her in a FUN and playful way.  

That way instead of taking the chance that she'll get burned out or may look back and resent that she had to do so much at such a young age, she'll look back and appreciate the fun times you spent with her... without even realizing how much she was learning in the process.

Just don't push her, make sure she's having fun, and realize when to "call it a day."  I think you'll both be fine :)

Answer 3

People are entitled to have opinions.  What your friend said about you pushing your child is simply an opinion, you do not need to listen to her.  There is nothing wrong with encouraging your child do  more, rather it'll help your child do better in the long run out in the real world.

Answer 4

Well, first of all its great that she loves to learn!! Second its great that she can write numbers and count to 30.  If she is so interested in math I don't see a problem with teaching her extra math stuff if she wants to do it.  If she doesn't want to do it or if you were to force her,  then there would be a problem. But from your paragraph explaining her love in math and like to learn more it seems fine what your doing.  This will teach her good learning habits later on in life. Great job mom!

experience Preschool teacher.

Answer 5

As long as she is still enjoying it keep it up. My daughter just turned three in January and she is already doing more advanced work than my friends 5 year old. I could not stop her if I tried.

Answer 6

It's so hard to say.  Really, you know your daughter better than anyone.  Having said that, I would say, let her guide your sessions.  You don't have to have a set 30 minutes every day for math.  Do some math one day, the next day to pretend play, the next day, do some cooking, the next day some crafts.  Make sure she has a balance and you won't go wrong.  She sounds like quite a girl!  Please remember that what's right for some children doesn't work for other children, so when people give you opinions, they are basing them on their experience and what was right for their kids, not your child.  

You are right to ask this question.  You can never go wrong with a little balance.

Answer 7

If you are relaxed and you make it fun, and your daughter asks, then you are not pushing her.

It all depends on your daughter's reaction.  If she is happy and enjoys herself, then you are doing fine.  It is only when a parent insists and the child doesn't want to do the work that there is a problem.

You can teach her to read now, did you know that?  Since she is in Montessori, the school will probably be doing that soon.  Did you know the ideal age to teach a child to read is age 4?  Your friend doesn't sound like she has too much experience with children.  Kids can learn a lot more than they are typically  presented with.  Just watch your daughter's attitude, and back off if she resists what you try to teach her.

Also, see if you can find that tape by Discovery Toys, called "Sounds Like Fun".  It's a musical way to learn phonics, which she will need to become proficient at reading.

Happy teaching!

Answer 8

As long as your child enjoys doing it everyday then go right ahead.  Just because every other 3 year old is not doing structured activities does not mean that your 3 year old is not entitled to do so.  Your daughter is obviously gifted, you should keep doing what you are doing.  Eventually you will need to see to it that she get tested, it seems that if she is this intellectually advanced she probably does not need to be in kindergarten.  Look at it this way, lots of children that want to learn more are not taught and end up being bored in school and acting out in class.  Do not let this happen to your daughter.

Answer 9

Nope, you're not at all -- my mom did all that to me when I was that young. At three, I started playing piano and the violin, and I was in gymnastics, ballet, and tap classes. I loved math and making up stories at that age, (I'm in college, now, as a math major). I'm so glad my momma did all that for me. You're a good momma. As long as she's eager to learn! Oh, and I was in Montessori, also!! Fun times ..

Answer 10

There is nothing wrong with wanting more from your child, but you should also remeber it is important for her to be a child..



A child needs to spend time playing, and playing with other children...Playing is her job...

If your pre school doughter is great at math...help her get better by using flash cards and computer math games...

But, please don't take her child hood from her..Let her be a kid...

Answer 11

I will answer that with some questions. Is it stressing her out? Is it fun for her? Why is it important to you have have her know all of this before entering kindergarten? Research shows that most children no matter what they learn prior, will all be on or around the same level when then get in second grade. The teachers job and your job is to introduce concepts and encourage your child to want to learn not to interfere with her childhood. Its always a joy to see your child learn and it is certainly something to brag about but don't expect her to be a genius because shes able to retain information well this is not uncommon in three-year olds.

Answer 12

if she enjoys it then do it