Am I spoiled or are these things for around the house a necessity?

Question

-Bathroom Rugs

-Hand Soap Dispensers (bathroom and kitchen)

-Disinfecting Cleaner Spray

-Sheets for all beds in the house

I grew up with all the "accessories" for the kitchen, bedroom and bathroom. I recently met my mother in law who doesn't have rugs on her bathroom floor, doesn't have soap to wash your hands with, doesn't have hand towels, doesn't have Scrubbing Bubbles type cleaner (no cleaner for that fact), most beds only have bed skirts on them, or the sheets are worn thin.

Is it likely that she bought all of the mentioned items before and just never replaced them? I find myself replacing these items monthly or yearly depending on the quality or price.

I am shocked that she can live like this. I wonder how she feels when she comes to my house. Would this make her feel poor? Or is she oblivious that I consider these things normal?

The situation is that she's a single mother, four kids, three live with her (son is married to me). She makes a decent income too.

Answer 1

Bathroom rugs are a preference.  I did quit using them since some people leave excessive water on rug so it may not properly dry and receive extra pet hair on it - - we now use a towel to step on & then pick up for washer.

I believe it is mandatory to have soap at a sink that you wash your hands.  In my case, the bathroom has bar of soap and a dispenser.  The kitchen sink is not used for hand washing - - go to bathroom to wash since the hand towels are also in there.

Personally believe it is mandatory for sheets on all beds and a regular washing routine for the sheets as well for sanitary purposes.

You need something to clean each surface.  When had the enamel coated cast iron tubs, Ajax or Comet was used.  With the newer tubs, need a cleanser but not as abrasive.  I have a whirlpool tub and use dish liquid for 'rings' and granular dish washer detergent for jet cleansing instead of the recommended granular chemicals.  There again, how can it be sanitary if not cleaned.

I utilize germ killing spray disinfectants periodically on all door k***s, cabinet k***s, faucets, drains, etc... to prevent spreading of germs and reinfecting each household member from colds/flu.

Cleanliness and to stop spread of germs, etc... should be on a mandatory list.  Preference to hand wash dishes or a dish washer is similar to rugs on floor.  It also depends on life style in household besides personal preference.

What she thinks about your place?  Probably thinks you are wasting money.  Don't worry about what she thinks; your house is your concern.  Her house is her concern.  It sure would bother me that there is no soap to wash your hands, though.

Answer 2

I don't have them, either.  They're not luxuries, just not essential.

Answer 3

none of her business what you buy or how you keep your home.those are normal things you should have in your house i have them in mine.your not spoiled.she is cheap or gross for not changing her sheets in years.

Answer 4

All I can say is i'm glad she's not my mother-inlaw.

Do things how you want them in your own house.

Answer 5

She may have grew up not having these things and never thought about buying them.She may not see them as necessary items. Not everyone has the same ways of keeping house and I don't think she is going to judge you by what is in your bathroom.

Answer 6

Sheets for all the beds *are* a necessity. Soap dispensers and bathroom rugs are nice. Scrubbing-bubbles types of cleaner aren't really a necessity, but they are convenient.

I grew up with bar soap, and it didn't hurt me one bit. My husband had a soap dispenser, and we use that now.

It sounds to me like your mother-in-law might enjoy a shopping trip. But you might want to rethink your priorities a hair too.

Answer 7

She might be mentally ill.  There is a mental illness that will cause the person to not clean themselves or their house.  She might not know there is anything wrong.

If your husband grew up in this environment he may not think anything is wrong.

Check with a health care professional or any social worker.

They will know.