Am I the Selfish one here? if so, then why?

Question

so i had my cell phone stolen... and i dont have one anymore... i find out that we are going to switch companies maybe by august... and then i dont know how long its gonna take to get new cell phones, so i ask my brother to let me have his (since he REALLY doesnt use his cell phone at ALL, he has it off 24/7 cuz he doesnt drive so he never sees his friends during vacations, besides my mom is going to give me her cell phone when she comes back from a vacation\training in august! so WHY cant he let me have his phone, which i would use EVERYday? meanwhile, when i am going to a party or sumthing, i get my dad's phone and my dad gets my brother's only for that 1 party (b/c my brother wont even let me take it anywhere) i mean come on how selfish do u have to b to get rid of sumthing u dont use at all.... well except he says he take videos and pictures... and i mean of what, he spends all day playing computer games

Answer 1

No, you're right.  But that doesn't change anything.  See what he wants- money, help with chores?

You may never know what he is hiding, er, why he doesn't want to give you this phone.  

But, if you say something the right way, you can usually get it.

So good luck!

Answer 2

not wrong..BUT it is your brother cell to lend out or not.. it is his choice...

Answer 3

That is merely your perception.  It is not as if you are going to die if you don't get a kidney transplant and your brother can't be bothered to let you have one of his because he is convinced he needs both of them and besides, he is squeamish about undergoing surgery!

Besides you lost one phone, what is to say you won't lose his too?   When I was your age cell phones didn't even exist.  I had to walk five miles in the snow to school and cut my own firewood to stoke the fire.  (just kidding).  We didn't have the internet and there were only two channels on the Black and White TV we could get in the rural area we lived in.   My older brother used to beat on me all the time when the folks weren't looking.  The phones were all ugly rotary dial things.   Life is tough.

Answer 4

Something that isn't easy to learn... no one owes you anything(be it family, friends, or strangers).  The sooner that is learned, the better.  Even when you do favors for others, it's rare that any will ever be repayed.  This world owes nothing to you, you must find a way to do it on your own.  If you learn that young, you may get further in this life.  I'm not trying to be negative... but if you know that you can't expect things from people and that when you give you should give not expecting anything in return, you'll go very far in this life.

Answer 5

your not being selfish

but in the end its his choice to lend it to you or not cuz its his

but sometimes siblings dont want other siblings to use or have there things just because they have the power to say yes or no....even when they dont use the things

so nothing u can really do

but ur not being selfish

Answer 6

Its your brother's phone, his property.  He has the right to deny use of it as he pleases.  

Your brother's exploitation of this wonderful opportunity to one-up on the sibling rivalry game seems to be working quite well.  If you really want to get him, stop begging and whining about not getting his phone.  

He's a dork, why do you need his help anyway?

Ignore him and focus on another option to resolve or cope with your cellular communication limitations.

Answer 7

you are not very responsible with your property. why would he risk having his lost or stolen? grow up!

Answer 8

It sounds like someone is desperate for a phone. Leave your brother alone, the phone belongs to him. Suck it up until you can get a new one.

Answer 9

Yes, you're selfish.  He may be, too, but I am not as certain about that.

First, you HAD a cell phone.  It was not your brother's fault that yours was stolen.  He had/has no obligation to let you have his phone.  (Note that you did not even say you wanted to "borrow" his phone, which would give some indication that you realized that it was HIS phone and his decision to lend it to you or not.)  Why should your brother lend you his phone when you are demanding something of his and acting like you are entitled to it?

Second, what is your brother supposed to do if he lends you his phone and it gets stolen, too?  Based on your attitude and the fact that you cannot get a replacement phone on your own, it is highly unlikely that you would be able to replace his loss if he lent you his phone and it got stolen.  You have also given no indication whatsoever that you would safeguard his phone better than you did yours.

Third, you don't NEED his phone.  You just WANT it.  Have you given any thought (other than selfish ones) WHY your brother lends his phone to your DAD while your dad lends you HIS phone?  This tells me your dad doesn't think you deserve to have your brother's phone, either.  You should count yourself lucky that your dad is willing to inconvenience himself and lend you his phone while he borrows your brother's.  This also tells me that your brother is not selfishly holding onto his own phone.  He trusts his phone with your dad, just not you.

If you are serious about wanting to know who is the selfish one, ask yourself these two questions:

A.  What unselfish act(s) have you done for your brother lately?

B.  What unselfish act(s) has your brother done for you lately?

Answer 10

It's HIS phone, and just because you don't SEE him using it doesn't mean he never does.  Grow up and get your own.