Am I the only person who finds shy people to be awkward, rude and annoying?

Question

I work in translation. Most of the time you just work at a computer and don't talk to many people, so this business attracts more than its fair share of shy people. Some are worse than others but there are a few who drive me up the wall they are so shy. Last week, I had to work on a project with this girl who says nothing most of the time. She kept going red, she couldn't express her views properly, the next day she didn't want to talk to me all morning and then was forced to join in the project again by the boss, she acted like I was coming on to her (LOL) when I was trying to engage her in the work and just get it done. There are other shy people who act like this in the company and there is even one person who is afraid of the telephone so whenever he is in the room, someone else has to answer it. I find this sort of awkward and selfish behaviour typical of shy people. I find them hard work, I find them rude, I think they reduce all human communication to s*x and actually I find them very annoying.

Answer 1

Shy people find it hard to talk to strangers. They just don't know what to say. People should realise these people need to have others talk to them to gain confidence.

Its people like you that make people shyer cause you say rude things cause they can't speak properly or put their ideas across.

Answer 2

You come across in your comments as rude, opinionated and judgemental. It's no wonder nobody wants to talk to you.

Answer 3

maybe you make them feel uncomfortable. you need to make the effort to make them feel included and understand they dont have the confidence you do. maybe your annoyence shows through to them and they feel uncomfortable just spending time with you

Answer 4

Shy people find loud and talkative people to be "awkward, rude, and annoying"

Answer 5

Your question strikes me as ignorant. No disrespect to you. You have no idea what has gone on in some people's lives. Events and illnesses take all a person's confidence and self esteem and some can never regain it. I was diagnosed and struggled with schizophrenia. The trauma and stress made me lose all my self esteem and confidence. It was a big step to go and buy a dress and ask for an ice cream, let alone go back to the workforce. I have met my fair share of arrogant people and confident people who fail to understand how situations can impinge on other people's development and confidence. I am not saying you have had a blessed life. I don't know you. But you sound as if you have never had a serious event such as an illness and all the stress that goes with it impact on all your self esteem. When I did go back to the workforce, it was so totally overwhelming I struggled to communicate and when the phone ring I shook. Of course nobody understood it, but the thing is, somebody did and offered me the TLC I needed. I am now a working professional with a college education. Sometimes all people need is some TLC and you know the saying "DO NOT JUDGE A PERSON UNTIL YOU HAVE WALKED A MILE IN THEIR SHOES" Congrats on the job and your success by the way. Some people would do anything to achieve what you have, especially shy people.

Answer 6

Yes you are.  Has it ever occurred to you, that YOU are the one with the problem.

I and a lot of colleagues detest talking or any sort of noise while we are working.  A few of us have unplugged our telephones.  Even at home I refuse to answer the telephone.  Unless I can actually see the person I will NOT talk to them.

When I am away from my desk and with people I want to be with, it's impossible to shut me up.

Answer 7

I'm shy, and I have problems with telephone conversations (I had a brain operation which has affected my aural comprehension, and when I can't see the other person I struggle).

I find my shyness is worse when dealing with arrogant, over-confident people who tend to try and dominate conversation, whereas with more reasonable people I can communicate far better.

Basically, you are part of the problem.

Answer 8

Every single time someone blushes when he/she talks to me he is saying to me "you are someone important and worthwhile; if you weren't then I wouldn't have felt shy". So no, I do not find them rude at all.

The lady you described is too shy, her shyness is crippling her, which is not good for her but hardly offensive to others; generally I like shy people as they are usually sensitive and they avoid offending people and annoying them.

Arrogant and self centered people like you on the other hand are irritatingly rude, annoying and often offensive; they also generally cause shy people to be even more shy. I bet you only think about yourself in any given situation and if you do happen to think about someone else, that would probably be only because that person affects you in one way or the other.

Answer 9

Nope, you're not alone. I am a hairstylist and I feel the same way.

Sometimes I just want to scream, "Just tell me what you want and

get the h**l out of my chair!"

Answer 10

I can imagine that it must be inconvenient, but imagine how these people must feel about themselves when they act this way, how it must interfere with their life and make them embarrassed, and try to have a little more patience. Putting pressure on them won't help, it'll just make them more embarrassed and less confident still. They can't help being the way they are (and they most likely wish that they could). As a formally shy person myself who still has a few features of shyness, I can assure you that it's not because they are reducing all human communication to s*x. Nor are they simply arrogant or trying to be rude. Their problem is that they feel like everything that comes out of their mouth has to be approved by the other person, and they're afraid that anything that does come out of their mouth will just sound stupid. I agree with the person above who suggested a confidence-boosting session. It would help them and you and benefit the company.

If you want to know more about shyness and you are on Facebook check out the group at http://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=23...

Answer 11

Nope.

Shyness is a concept with which I am entirely unfamiliar. I have never experienced it. I don't know what it's like. I certainly don't understand it; I don't think I'd know how to be shy of my life depended on it.

But I've seen it no end of times.

And in truth I tend to react gently to it. It can't be easy for shy people to cope, and it's no good just boldly announcing that shyness is unnecessary and they should be more confident - it just doesn't work that way. It's like telling somebody who is afraid of heights or confined spaces to get over it - a ridiculous and thoughtless response to a real problem.

I am more than familiar with people shy around me, too. Ask most people who have ever embodied authority in any way, shape or form and my guess is they'll all say the same. It's as if a lack of shyness in one person is often enough, in itself, to cause shyness in another.

So no. I don't find shyness irritating at all.

If anything it's one of the few human responses which bring out the more humane side of my otherwise inhumane and brutally insensitive personality.

Which makes me wonder if it doesn't have some kind of mystical survival value.

Answer 12

Yes

Answer 13

Don't forget that shyness is far worse for the person who is shy rather than people who have to deal with them.

I know it can be a chore but I do think you are wrong to call shy people 'rude'.

Answer 14

The whole of my teens was spoilt by a crippling shyness. It was horrible I won't go into the effects it had on my social life but even the one I had was crippled with this horrible lack of confidence. You find it annoying? Tough! Count yourself lucky that you do not have the problem  

Answer 15

Why don't you do somemthing about it then? Suggest a confidence building session with an outside agency to your boss.

Answer 16

Have thought of a career as a relationship counsellor?

Answer 17

Some folks are just a little more emotionally shunted than others.  In the working world you have to deal with all kinds of people.  Try not to be so annoyed and be a bit more compassionate.

Answer 18

well lets just say ur not the only one, cuase basically i hate people, and i feel like im the only person that knows what im doin is right, and i judge poeple the first second i see them, and usually i will hate that person, until i got to know em :)

Answer 19

Sometimes being too confident can be more rude and more annoying . Its just the type of person they are not how they come across.

Answer 20

Well hello...ln this big wide world we come  across all types of personalities.Maybe you are fortunate and were born with a confident personality and nature....but not everyone was.

  lf we judged everyone by their shyness and attitude...goodness me...

You would have no one to grumble about.