Am I wrong to think this is a bit ridiculous?

Question

Today I was babysitting and the elementary aged child I was watching took a stuffed animal into the restaurant where we ate dinner. We left the restaurant, ran a few more errands, and then I took the child home. Later tonight, I got a phone call to see if the animal was left in my car. It was not. I called the restaurant and they did have the stuffed animal. The child was WAILING uncontrollably in the background for the animal. I felt awful that I didn't check to make sure she had it, but I guess I just took it for granted that a first grader would keep up with the animal. I asked the restaurant if I could come tonight and pick it up, and they said they would be around cleaning up for a while, so that was fine. So, I got in my car, drove half an hour, got the stuffed animal. On the way to get the stuffed animal, I called the parents and offered to drive the HOUR from the restaurant to their house with the animal or meet them somewhere with the animal tomorrow evening after work. (Keep in mind that this was getting rather late.) They said no, I didn't have to do that, they were trying to teach the child a lesson about keeping up with their things, but THEN wanted to know if I would take it to the child at daycare tomorrow? Keep in mind, from my house to the daycare center is at LEAST a 45 minute drive. I will have to leave my house 2 hours early in the morning to get the animal to the daycare. All this for a stuffed animal. Am I wrong to think that it is a bit ridiculous that I am having to rearrange my ENTIRE day around getting this child the animal? My issues are this...

1) I think the child is a bit too old to make an issue out of not having the animal for ONE night. (And no, I am not saying too old to have a comfort/security toy-- I just think that at this age they should be a bit more responsible.)

2) With the cost of gas, I have already driven quite a bit to get the animal back. Why couldn't the parents have offered to come get it tomorrow after work? Why couldn't they have offered to meet me halfway tonight?

3) I volunteered to keep the child today because she had wanted to stay.

I really DON'T mind watching her or spending time with her. I love her-- she is family. I am with children on a daily basis, and I just think this is a bit ridiculous. Am I alone it this (my husband feels like I do)?

Answer 1

It's normal for a first grader to still be so attached to a favorite toy.  They do typically leave stuff behind too at that age.  "Munchie" doesn't come out in the car with us.  He has to stay home.  I hate when Munchie is even brought out of bed because I dont want to be looking for him at bedtime.  

It was never your responsibility to go and get it or bring it to the child though, and I hope you didn't feel that way.  You didn't fail as a babysitter for leaving the stuffed animal behind.  You were hired to watch one child.  Not the child and her toy.  The child was brought home safely... your job was done well!

If you do return it, you should be reimbursed/compensated for gasoline and time.  If you don't want to bring it to the child, don't.  That doesn't automatically mean you're starting anymosity or creating friction in your relationship.  Your schedule is too crazy today or something.  The parents will come and get it, I guarantee it.  Parents of a child with a security toy know WAY too well the drama and tears that accompany its loss.  Nobody would deliberately go through that.  Call their bluff and they'll find the time to pick it up.  And if they don't, the child has begun the detachment process and is starting to move on.

Answer 2

i have a 7 yr old so i know that sometimes they like to make a big deal out of something very small and if it was late at night the child could've been getting tired, but i also agree that its the age to be teaching responsibility - my daughter has lost a few things that end up getting left behind forever for the sake of a lesson and i dont make expensive purchases (nintendo etc.) for these reasons.  i think the parents should come get the toy when the have a chance - dont rush and be worried about getting it back to the child right away. you did enough to even find the toy for them and go get it!

Answer 3

I think the child is old enough to go without it for a couple more days until you see her again. There is no need to waste the gas. I'm sure if she is anything like my son she has plenty of other animals that she can sleep with. It sounds like the parents should have taught her this lesson way before this happened or she would not have been "wailing". If that were my child I would have offered to meet you, though so you didn't have to waste more gas than you already did.  

Answer 4

That really is crazy... i'd mail it to them.

Answer 5

Obviously you don't understand 6 year olds.  This stuffed animal is a source of comfort for her and to be without a source of comfort is very  hard for a small child.  I doubt very much you were any different at her age.  And if you can't understand that then maybe you shouldn't be taking care of small children.  Since you were supposedly the one responsible when you went to the restaurant it was your responsiblity to make sure the child had the stuffed animal when you left.  Six year old children are not mineature adults and they still think and act like children...you have to learn to accept that, obviously you're not very tolerant of that fact.  

As for the other problem a simple, "I am sorry but no I can not take her to Day Care because........" will do.  

Answer 6

If they're trying to teach her a "lesson" why would they need you to drop it off at the day care? She'll survive without it

Answer 7

they're taking advantage of you that's horrible

they should come get the toy from you

Answer 8

i think that the childs parents should get up 2 hours early to come pick the animal up from your house in the morning.

Answer 9

I'd agree with you 100%

But the cost of gas is burning our pockets like wildfire, though i see what the problem is i don't see how they couldn't come to get it after work or come half way to pick up the silly thing. I bet the child was wonderful just seen a daycare once before and children do often loose track of the thing they are carrying because of the world around them. You shouldn't be the one to blame though it might be a good idea to try and see if you check every once and a while too see if they have what they want when they have it.

Enjoy the child!

Answer 10

I think that you started it buy going to pick the stuffed animal up. That was very sweet of you but not your job. I would have told the parents where you went to and let them go get it. Do they understand how much traveling you would have to do in the morning?

Answer 11

i would make them meet you and if they cant they should come and get the animal if she needs it for daycare.i dont think its ridiculous for a child to have a stuffed animal that they are totally attatched to. my daughter has 1 that she would just go to peices if anything happened to it.but she has also been through some pretty tramatic expereinces, so i guess its a little different

Answer 12

Nope, I totally agree with you.  That is very ridiculous, and if I were you, I would just wait to give the animal back, until the next time you saw the child.  You already made an effort and the parents turned you down.  Let them come get the animal if the child wants it so bad.

Answer 13

That was nice of you to go out of your way to get the stuffed animal... not many people would do that.  

I agree with you that the parents are out of line.  After all, if they are trying to teach their daughter a lesson about being responsible for her possessions, it would do her well to be without it for a couple of days.  

I would call them and say, "I'm terribly sorry, but my schedule is just too hectic today and I can't make it to daycare."  If the parents use work as an excuse, there's no reason you should have to go out of your way any more than you already have... you can see where their priorities are.