Am i being tupid for feeling like this?

Question

im pregnant and due in a week. i became pregnant after i was raped and decided that adoption would be the best option. since finding out i was pregnant i decided that i would move back home but havent told my family about being raped. as a result my mum just thinks that i slept around she doesnt offer me any support constantly critises me and makes stupid comments all the time about young mums and because of her i constantly feel even more depressed. and now she wants to be there with me during the birth but i dont want her to be there i want to be alone ive tried to talk to her about it but shes over sensitive i dont know what to do.

Answer 1

I'd tell her the truth. and even if you were'nt raped, theres no reason for her to act like that, shes your mum! and i'd still tell her that you want to be alone, your the one giving birth here, you shoudlnt be considering her feelings, i know that sounds harsh, but she wasnt helping you at the time. and afterwards she'll feel guilty and be more supportive, and look out for you more. just tell her the truth. x

Answer 2

first of all you should tell her about the rape. that would probably change your mothers mind alot. my mom got crappy with me also, when i found out i was pregnant @ 17. (first bf & i ended up marrying him) you have to think a little about your mom too. she is losing her baby! her baby is having a baby! after i talked to my mom about it she didn't even realize half of what she was saying was hurting me. also does she know that you are putting it up for adoption? i think it will change alot if you are a little more open with her. im not sure how old you are, you didn't say, but if you moved back home, then obviously you were old enough to make your own decisions and she needs to except that. if she cannot, then i would tell her that she is making a big mistake not supporting you with this. she will lose allof you if she continues being childish. my mom was almost the same way.-as far as letting her in the room, tell her that you cannot handle her snide comments , so unless she refrains from using them, she cannot be in the room, b/c you don't need anything more to upset you during delivery. the doc will tell you that.- btw im a mother of 2, pregnant with the third. and im 30

Answer 3

Tell her the truth. If you can't tell your own mum the truth and live a lie that makes you look bad, you'll be living a lie for the rest of your life.

You shouldn't have to live a lie. After all it wasn't your fault, but congratulations on the baby and I hope everything works out.

Answer 4

i think you should tell het the truth as a mu i would want my daughter to tell me that

i know its hard when i was younger i was sexually assulted and it took my a few weeks to tell my mum cos i thought she would blame me but once i told her it helped me alot

i think you should sit down with her and tell her youll find she wont be making the smart coments any more and will be there for you 100%

hope this helps

Answer 5

I think you should talk to your mum. Invite her round and settle her down and tell her about your hard times of being raped if you cant tell her who can you tell Im sure after that she will be with you every step of the way. Don't let that get you down bring up the child how you want it. You know the truth and if they don't believe you thats up to them. Tell your mum you would like to do it on your own shes you mum she will understand! Good Luck.

Answer 6

i know how you feel. just dont le her bother you. my mom is also very rude((go check out my last question))

Answer 7

Tell the truth, hiding things is only hurting you.

Answer 8

I think you need to tell her the truth she will be more supportive and understanding.  You also need to talk to someone professionally.  You have been very brave continuing with this pregnancy but dont do it all on your own.

Answer 9

why didnt you tell her the truth for christs sake, no wonder she is making assumptions, wouldnt you if it was your daughter??

Answer 10

its up 2u, ur baby, ur birth, well not ur birth but your babys birth, tell her u dont want her there! and also id tell her about being rapped

Answer 11

Your mother aside, have you spoken to anyone?  Have you spoken with a rape councillor?  Have you spoken, truly, with anyone about the baby?  Over sensitivity is no excuse for you being subjected to something you don't want.

Is there someone you would rather be with you at the birth?