Am i wishing for too much?

Question

i am constantly feeling not happy about my relationship of 2 years. I love him very much, but we often having arguments which can result into very bad memories. mostly it starts with something on his side that makes me suspect he likes someone or miss someone or fancy someone or flirt with someone. it could be a voicemail, an email, a pin code, a comment, a chat, a look. if i ask along the line of what i suspect, he would blow up very quickly and calling me insure and jealous and paranoid. Be honestly, i am just being cautious. But the more he react in the extremely way, the less i feel trust him. he could say very hurtful thing because of me asking questions (he called it accusing him). the hurtful thing he said to me while angry does make me skeptical about his feeling for me more and more these days. So i tend to think the negative cases more these days. my partner can be very hearty, he is good at carrying out something, but very bad at organizing somthing.(you always have something to do at work with colleagues, but we dont do much together, he is bad at this, and i feel like low quality relationship due to lack of quality time),

after together for two years, he stops perform the best side of him, and sometimes, he is just lazy and very selfish, self-centred....i feel my feelings for him is still there, but i dont feel in love anymore. everything feels like routines between us, and its him that makes that routine way of acting and reacting around me, (he is a IT guy).

I can see if he is continuing doing this, our love will eventually die, are there anyone who can help me with a bit tips about how to get him realize what he is doing??

i need to feel love in the emotional way...but i think he just want a easy relationship that make life less lonely?? or

Answer 1

You don't respect him or trust him. You cannot have a relationship without respect or trust. You two should have ended a long time ago. It sounds like you are just asking to be dumped and are practically begging him with your suspicions. Of course he is going to get ticked off if you accuse him every two seconds of being unfaithful. Dump him so he can find someone who can trust him.

Answer 2

2 years is a long enough sentence, to be in a painful relationship. He doesn't respect you, this is so obvious from the abusive way he treats you. get rid of him and find someone who appreciates you for who you are. relationships shouldn't be so painful. Good Luck! I hope you meet someone worthy of you.

Answer 3

you say you love him so whats the problem. start respecting him a little. i think what your relationship lacks is mutual respect, compassion and COMMUNICATION. you should tell him all these things that you feel. instead of telling others, and tell him you love him like a dozen times every single day. find good things about him and praise him every day. atleast once each day. tell him you wants him to do the same. communication is the key to a good relationship. talk and talk and talk. find his interests and talk about them. take interest in his life. why do you have trust issues with him? did he cheat on you in the past? or it is some insecurity from your childhood or previous relationships?? try trusting him blindly and see how things go. atleast give it a try. become his best friend somehow. you know how we talk to best friends. in a relaxing, loving, easy going kind of way. soon he'll start telling you everything about himself (don't ever get angry at him if he tells you something you don't like) and you'll both become good friends. and soon after that your relationship will become wonderful. good luck!

Answer 4

its hard to have 100% trust for someone if they have have hurt you in the past though if you have been hurt from ex boyfriends not him i think if your really wanting you both to work out you should let go of the fear even talk to a counsellor that may help you overcome this. have you tried talking to him about your emotional needs not being fully met if you haven't i suggest you should it may help you alot though if you have and he doesn't seem to care maybe let go of this relationship and find someone who's wanting the same thing as you are. sometimes i think its harder for males to fully meet there lovers needs though always stating he may he hurting in some way isn't helping the problem all its doing is pushing him away.and by the sounds of it your not happy in this relationship so maybe take in mind everything i have said to you. hope this has helped.

Answer 5

A great sailor does not always require a calm sea.