Am i wrong for not wanting this baby?

Question

im so messed up and confused i need some help.i just found out im pregnant and to be honest im not ready for it im scared my whole life is gonna change and thats what scares me my husband is as happy as can be but im not ive been crying all the time but not in front of him cuz i know he'll feel very hurt if he seen that. im still young and there was still so much i wanted to do in life that doesnt involve a child does anyone have anything to say that will make me feel better or give me more of an open mind toward this situation thanx and godbless

Answer 1

Tell Your HUSBAND and dont feel bad. It happens.

Answer 2

i think it is healthy to mourn that life would have been different - had this timing been different.  mourn it.  but then take a deep breath and start realizing that your book of life has a new chapter and obviously God Almighty is the author of that.  how exciting.  your new baby will love to hear their mommy laugh a lot too - so when the day comes that you see the silver lining -- laugh like there is no tomorrow!  your dreams will be fulfilled better than any plan you could have written.  the timing is just not your idea of ideal.

-mb

Answer 3

I can somewhat relate to what you are going through although we all have very different situations. I am currently 26 weeks pregnant with a little girl and she wasn't what you would call planned. At first I was blown away with the thought of raising another baby on my own and I was resentful towards my now ex-boyfriend and I didn't want to even acknowledge the fact that I was pregnant. It took me quite a few weeks and a few blow ups with my ex and I told him how I was feeling because I knew that it wasn't healthy to keep these feelings bottled up inside.

  We all have to do what is best for ourselves... it took me a few weeks to get used to the fact that I was going to have a baby and there were days that I still wasn't too thrilled with the idea, but now I have fallen in love with my baby and can't wait to meet her. Sure she wasn't planned and there were things that I wanted to do that would have to be put off for a while but when you think about it, we only get so many chances to bring life into this world and I ought to be very thankful as many many people out there struggle day in and day out to have their own children!

Answer 4

it's all normal to feel this way....it changes everything, hopefully for the best....talk to your husband and tell him your scared.  He is suposed to be your supportr thru this.  It'll make you feel better to get it off your chest. Plus stress isn't good for you or baby right now.  talk to anybody a parent sibling or friend too just say what you feel.

Also there are groups to help you online if you need to vent or get advice

www.cafemom.com

goodluck!!!!

Answer 5

i felt like this with my first baby too. i wanted to travel, i have huge plans to go to school and be things etc, and i wondered too. but after i got used to the fact of being preg and having a baby i started to get excited, and happy. and once i felt my little girl kicking inside of me, i started to truly fall in love with her. the moment i saw her face looking at me, and depending on me and only me, i was so happy. and i have never looked back. yes i was young, and yes i had so many goals, but being a mother is the most rewarding thing i have ever experienced in my life.

dont worry, its normal to feel this way. im sure you will get used to it. your life isnt over, its only just begun, and dont worry, you will still be able to do alot of the things you wanted to. you will just need to learn how to incorporate your new little angel into it.

things will change, and look up, they did for me, and im sure they will for you.

dont feel guilty. remember hormones are crazy too, so feelings are going to be all over the place.

good luck with your new amazing life, and be glad that your hubby is so happy about it.

Answer 6

you should of though of this before you had this baby but i say tell your husband what your feeling he has to understand, but even though you don want this baby i strongly suggest you not to just give it up on someone or anything of that sort give it time...hope everything goes well

Answer 7

You are not wrong for having the feelings that you have.  But God has a plan for everyone and even though you don't think you can do it now, He will give you the strength to do it.  Also, sit your husband down and tell him that you are scared and talk to him about your feelings.  I bet that you will find that although he is happy, he is a little scared too.  God Bless you and congratulations!

Answer 8

You are not wrong at all. You are human and have every right to have feelings. You need to decide what is best for you, even if that means not keeping the pregnancy. You do have three options available and safe for you (abortion, adoption or keeping the child) and you need to talk to someone unbiased who can go over all of them with you. Right now is not a time to figure out things on your own. I commend you for being responsible enough to know that a baby is a huge impact on your life. I hope things work out for you.

Answer 9

You are not wrong at all. However, you NEED to talk to your husband about this. If you do not feel ready and do not want to go through with this then you should NOT be going through with it. It is ultimately your decision and you are the only one who can make it. You need to stop letting your husband think everything is ok when very clearly it isn't. Talk about it. Talk about your options. Talk about money and how you'll be able to deal with it if you do have the baby. Talk about who will have what duties. Make sure he knows what you're afraid of and find out if he will be there for you and help you out as much as possible so that you will be able to keep living your life and do the things you want to do. Know that you do not, by any means, have to have this baby. Also know that having a baby does not completely take away your chances at having the life you want. My friend just had a baby and she struggled with whether or not to go through with it as well. Ultimately she decided that she had enough support and resources to have a baby and continue her schooling, which was one of her main worries. If you do have the baby it will be very hard and things will be very different, but it is not the end, especially since you do have a husband who (I hope) will be around to help take care of the kid. Just make sure you really feel right about whatever decision you make because if you bring an unwanted baby into this world and end up resenting it you will be doing quite a bit of damage to everyone involved. You also do not want to end the pregnancy and then regret it. I know that sounds like a lot to think about, and it is, but it's necessary and you'll be glad you gave it some real thought before making a decision. Good luck to you in whatever you decide and I hope everything else works out for you.

Answer 10

yes

its nt dat poor babies fault u dont think u want da baby u cud give him/her 4 adoption bt dont abort him/her