Am i wrong to be angry? Please help.?

Question

Me and my girlfriend are recently becoming a part of a long distance relationship of 50 miles away. I know it doesnt sound far, but we both dont have our licenses for about 2 years and i dont know what to do anymore. She has stayed inside for most of the summer not doing anything for me but i dont know what to do. She says she needs balance in her life by going out and socializing, but when she does, its always with her girl friends and boy friends. But all of the boy friends are slimy, and i dont trust most of them as far as i can throw them. SHe has also done stuff before with most of these boys, (making out, up her shirt, head, etc..) Am i wrong for getting mad and wanting to end our relationship because of this? Is she wrong for being able to live with putting me through the situation of watching her go hang out with boys she's done stuff with before when i'm 50 miles away? What should i do? Please help.. Thanks..

Answer 1

im surprised she hasnt left you yet. You cant tell her what not to do she sounds like a prisoner in this relationship you need to end the relationship and move on

Answer 2

If your girlfriend is more interested in socializing with her friends than going out with you, that is definitely a problem. She is sending a signal whether she means to or not. It takes two to have a relationship. If she can't be bothered to stay in touch, she is sending a clear message.

I would be angry if I were in your shoes. Long distance relationships are hard enough without the other person going out with other guys, whether it's for a date or not. I would think that would make my boyfriend mad. That's not surprising. I'm not surprised you are upset. I would be too.

I would want to end the relationship if for no other reason that to see how she reacts to it. If she continues in the same way, and she continues to be so self-absorbed, I would take that as a clear signal that this relationship is over and you are better off without her. She is not responding in kind.

It seems true she doesn't want to come right out and say it but she is moving on without you. It would be nice if she would just make up her mind and get on with it. She's making it worse trying to have it both ways. That's no way to have a relationship.

You seem sensible and level-headed. I wouldn't say you sound like you are over-reacting and you don't necessarily seem so insecure that you have to turn everything into a battle. You are probably sensing something and you are right to feel this way. Listen to your gut. If this  just isn't happening, don't make yourself suffer anymore waiting on her to contact you. You have better things to do with your time. Stay calm, be cool, and tell her you don't want a relationship any more. But don't let her see you become emotional. You deserve to be treated better than this. Be glad to have it done and over with.

You'll find someone else. Give it time. You don't need that.

I hope this helps you.

Answer 3

Break up with her. You can find somebody who is closer and nicer.  

Answer 4

You can end it.  If you don't want to do that, then you both can take the bus to see each other....but it must be equal.  If she and you are up for that, then you can work it out....but if you suspect she's with other guys, then you might as well just end it.

Answer 5

Sounds like you are both young. It would be easier to end it now. If you feel that she cant stay within the boundaries clearly set out by the relationship you have then you need to move on.

She probably means well and doesn't want to go do the things that she once did with these boys, but if you cant trust her, then it is for a reason. The reason may be something she is doing, or the way you think. Either way, it is not good for you to become obsessive about it. You still have so much more ahead of you. I know its easier said than done, but you have to find the power within yourself to make changes, with the relationship, and mostly how you think. Don't be a jealous person, but at the same time, don't be a pushover and be naive. Find the balance.

Learn from this situation. When I have problems or issues in my life, whether they are caused by me or someone else, I always think to myself: What is the best lesson I can learn from this to be better in the future. Then I cut my losses and move on.

The lesson may be to not repeat certain actions, not to follow someones example, not to think in certain ways that are negative and emotionally destructive.

Our youth has so much to offer the world. Find your place in this world and make a difference for others. Use you experiences and feelings to help others in situations similar to yours.

Now I probably sound like a school counselor.

Hope I helped!! Good luck with wich ever path you choose :)

Answer 6

You are still young I assume if you can't get your license for two years.

This is way too much stuff to worry about at such a young age. If there is no trust in the relationship then it is usually doomed to begin with. Unless you are willing to put A LOT of work into it. That's what old married people do, or people that are in it for the long haul.

Your gf really doesn't sound like she is very respectful towards you if she really does behave the way she is.

I think it is a good thing for you two to have a break. You need to find someone without so much drama and issues.

Trust and respect is everything in a relationship. It doesn't sound like you have any of it with your gf.

I'd move on with your life . Enjoy it, you're to young to have these worries.