Question:

Am i wrong to be so angry?

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i brought my car about a year ago but have not yet passed my driving test. i knew my insurance would be about £1000 so i saved £1000 of my money and gave it to my my mum and dad to look after so i didnt spend it. i stopped my driviong lessons for a while and didnbt think anything more about the money. The 2 weeks ago i started up my driving lessons again and said to my mum 'where is that money?' she avoided the question for a while but then addmitted that she lent it to my dad (they had split up since i gave her the money) and that it had been spent, when i asked why they didnt ask me first she said we didnt think it would be a problem. When i asked her when i could get it back she basically said i dont know. i got angry at her but she tried to expain herself by saying she used it to pay the bills, i said i would have given it to her if she had asked but the fact she took my money without asking and spent it and now ill prob never get it back makes her a theif. she knows im angry but..

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3 ANSWERS


  1. Okay. There is only one thing to do now - think of it as money you gave to them to pay the bills and help them out. Explain to her about how you were saving the money and wanted to avoid debt, and how you don't expect your Dad to pay back the money. Tell her you are upset about this and that you wouldn't trust them with your money again. Then try to let it go, considering all the years when they took care of you.

    Try to save up some more money. And next time don't give your money to your parents for safekeeping, in stead just put it in the bank.


  2. My question to you is this, if you say that you would have lent it to them anyway, why are you concerned about the bill?? I just dont understand that, you say you would give it to them if they had asked but yet you say that your dad is bad with bills. Why would you give it to them then?? Either way, I do agree that you have all right to be upset and both of them, not only your mom for giving it to your dad, but your dad taking it especially when he knows what it will be used for. Well unfortunately you cant do anything about it because it's already gone. You wont sound like a spoiled brat for telling your parents how you feel because it was your money, it's not like its their money, even if they gave it to you, I am sure you earned it. I think you should be upfront and honest with your parents and tell them how disappointed you are in them that they would treat you like a child by taking your money without asking. That's actually illegal what they did. I know you probably dont want to take your parents to court, who does, but I think you need to be firm and tell them that they have to find a way to either pay you the $1000 back OR they need to find a way to be able to pay your insurance every single month without fail or you will take legal actions. Put the fire up under their butts to make up for the mistakes that they did. I know as parents we always feel that our kids will always be kids. I remember about 2 years ago I badly was in need of gas in my car so I knew my 7 year old daughter had 20 in her bank in her room, I took it out of her bank and never thought about it again. My daughter was extrememly upset and was torturing my son (her little brother) thinking he took it. Finally I had to tell her I took it and she told me that she was disappointed in me that I took it without asking her. I couldnt rebuttle at all. I had to take it because it was my fault. You couldnt imagine how much it hurt me that my daughter said she was disappointed in me, I almost wanted to cry. I actually gave her back $40 that day. Talk to your parents, dont be scared!

  3. Well, if I was in your shoes, I'd be angry too.  It would have been better if they had asked for the money instead of just taking it.  Maybe calling your Mum a thief was a little too much though.  She is your Mum after all but in the future, put your savings in a bank.  I say forgive and forget but be clear with your parents that what they did was wrong.

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