An unundescended t******e and my love story:(? (please read if you ahve time)?

Question

i have undescended t******e by birth. i have only one t******l.

As per i know when i am 10 years, i went through some operation. Some of my relatives talked like "i can’t get children". Some told i won’t be fit to marriage.

I know there comments @ that time i am 10 years

After operation, nobody told me anything. I found myself; i still have only one t******l. From that time i decided not to marry.

i never tried to talking to girl till 'i am 19 years.. I thought 'i am harmful to them'

When i am 19 years old, all of our college went to tour.. One girl followed me, keep calling me good boy/skeleton (i am lean:( ) etc...

5 days passed. She is most beautiful girl of our class.

I tried avoiding her, she still looking at me. She told me "you are most innocent and smart looking person and with good height". I never saw myself in such a +ve way till that time(i am alone, that was what i feel all the time).

She tried calling me(home land line phone), i avoided her. She felt 'i am more innocent than she thought i am'...

By this time everyone in class noticed huge change in me. She also noticed.

I never maintain good dress... but I started.

She is happy.

Exams, preparation holidays: I called her and told "sorry". She asked why? "i told sorry for disturbing". She laughed and replied "hmmmm ok". We had some talk, she told about her familly.

That night, i didn’t got sleep.. And i decided to not to talk with her any more.(I felt I am harmful to her)

A started avoiding her, she got anger.

I lost 4 papers in exams, all her anger changed to, may be love.(she know, i never lost subjects before).

we both have to work for same project. I made some politics and changed my project group. I am about to tell her the same(I am going out of project ). One of my friend xxxxx told 'he will tell her'. I replied ok.(i want completely move out of her life).

My friend xxxxx asked me, 'ask me if you need any help regarding her'. I told thanks, i told a lie to him 'i won’t talk with her till i finish education (i don’t know why i told this). I told Xxxxx about her family and how she talks. (i don’t know why i told these)

2 months later, i saw her on road...

She went to xxxxx(same project group), and told him "i saw Juvaj"

xxxxx replied "did he stopped you on road? Then why are you thinking of him?"

I meet xxxxx two days after this.. He told what happened when she saw me etc...

And also he told "i am playing with her like anything yar, i am always keep teasing her by calling 420”

He told me “he used to teas her, due to you only Juvaj lost subject, juvaj is good person. So xxxxx named her 420 etc….”

He also told “He is having full touches with her, now a day”.

I am 20 by that time.(5 months later)

I meet xxxxx , he reminded me “Juvaj, once you asked her for a movie and she laughed and left away, right? Few months back she asked me for a movie and x*x replied “why should I come with you, get lost.. you are a 420” “juvaj, I am teasing her like anything yar. Etc….

He tried to tell me, true love is false.. we have to play with girls etc…

I thought “any one is better than me for her and just went back to job search”

One day supplementary results came, x*x called me and asked for result”I got zero marks, nothing wrong with me.. something should be wrong with correction. How come I will get zero, when I answered many Questions?”

Xxxx replied, enjoy.

Xxxx in chatting told me “I scolded her for 1 hr, juvaj failed due to you”

First time, I asked him a Question “Did you told her, I(me) got zero, even though I have written good?”

No reply from him….

I have her mail password with me, I saw his mails to her… “In one of mail he told “just leave Juvaj for God seek, why are you worrying for him””

I don’t know what is this mail means? And don’t want to see her mails any more.

I thought of changing her password, and i changed her password.

He called me and blackmailed me to give password(I don’t know whatz wrong I did to him).

I replied; let her ask, I will give the password.

I mailed her password to one of her friend.

One day he came online and pinged me…

I asked him about his ex, what if she (his ex) might have loved you?

x*x replied, “she(his ex) is not like all girls”

I got anger, I simply copied all the chatting and mailed to her.

She called me and told, “you can become bad for things you want, that’s not good”

She switched of her phone then after…

I mailed her many times, no repliy

One day he called and told me”I(xxxx) told her Juvaj, edited chatting, just a word she scolded you, hehehehe”

Later I came to know; he created screens (yahoo archive chat windows) in mspaint and mailed her.

He changed whole chat content.

27th Feb 2008, I went to s***n test (I saw about that in internet). Dr told, I have sperm count of 80 million. I am perfect for having kids….

I am 24 years now (4 years passed).

She still don’t know anything…

I still love her.

Is this is what life?

Answer 1

awwww.

your story is a little confusing but i get the overall gist of it.

You thought noone would want to marry you because you cant have children, so you ignore love even when you find a nice lady. Now you find out  all these years you actually can have children but the lady you love is now out of the picture.

So, have you heard from her in the past four years?

you sound like a very lovely guy. im sure  there is a woman out there for you.

keep your eyes open and dont be afraid to wear your heart on your sleve.

Answer 2

I can imagine, all these years you must have gone through a real hectic and difficult situation. But you are a real nice person. People like who( who is really concerned abt others life and desires) are very rare.

I agree with soonkem..God must have kept really goods thing for u in the future. Think that the medical check up done to u is the first step of ur future life.

You don't know what would ve been her reaction or decision if u wld have told her abt it....So dont think abt it now. She will come back to u if she is meant for u (this is from my personal experience).....be optimistic......Everything is already written on ur forehead by the Almighty.........All the best.  

Answer 3

The best thing you did was get the medical check up and find out that you can have children. You obviously love this girl. But you need to repair some wrongs you have done. Even if you have someones password you shouldnt open another persons mails or chats without their permission.That will defineatly tell someone you don't trust them. Why don't you relax and try to be honest with this girl and talk to her directly?Don't listen to this guy you call a friend. To treat another person, girl or boy like a plaything is using them, and he sounds selfish to be the way he is.Be true to who you are and go after her if you love her, just do it yourself and not through another person.Most of all be honest to her.Dont go through any friends to help you, talk to her yourself.If you cant reach her by phone ,go to see her.

Answer 4

So sad :(

Answer 5

it really should have taken more time for you to put such thing into words. congrats for your boldness.

yes , this is life. but as you might already know it does not end there.  come out . see how many new faces are there? personally i don't think teen age (may it be 19) is not the correct age to find the love of the life, your soul mate. so set this thing aside. once again become a new person. i won't say you should forget the whole incident. let it reside in your mind as a precious experience. you have learned something from this , right? and one more thing ,next time when you fall in love , let it be a matured relationship. my wishes for you. and don't trust anyone in that matter again. you be the deciding authority of your life