Answers to common questions?

Question

I'm looking for witty, snappy comebacks to those common questions veg*ns get asked. They can be funny, ridiculous, etc.

My last post on this topic was deleted for an unknown reason, so I'm reposting this.

Some common questions:

where do you get your protein

what DO you eat

do you eat animal crackers

how long will this last?

etc. etc.

Answer 1

what are animal crackers?

do you mean... biscuits shaped like teddy bears and koalas? haha

Answer 2

1. From the victims of those who left their doors unlocked.

2. Leaves, twigs, maybe a baby or 2.

3. No, only human crackers.

4. Longer than you will live.

Answer 3

oh my gosh i get the animal cracker one all the time hahaha

sometimes i tell them i eat people, but not animals. they generally never ask again haha.

or if they wave a piece of chicken or something in front of me i throw facts at them such as the fact that every time chicken is packed up, there's some f***s in there too so i ask them if they are enjoying their poo.

i usually tell them all about slaughterhouses and make them lose their appetites :p

Answer 4

Why do you need a comeback? If you think people are being childish by asking you "ridiculous" questions about being a vegetarian, then answering in kind just makes you childish and immature too. Be the bigger person and walk away.

Answer 5

my answer to the animal cracker question is "if you ate a ginger bread man would that make you a cannibal?"

Answer 6

*Tell them you get your protein from beans, rice, and fortified breakfast cereal.  

*Tell then you eat everything but meat.

*Tell them that only vegans can't eat animal crackers because they contain dairy.

*Tell them it will last until animals aren't tortured for their meat.

To cover the Bible and Jesus side of things you can find all the answers at this website...

http://www.vnv.org.au/site/htmfiles/chri...

For all the rest go to...

http://www.peta.org/about/faq-veg.asp

Answer 7

say i eat cigarettes and that is what vegan is

Answer 8

http://www.postpunkkitchen.com/forum/vie...

These are hilarious.  

people are so intrusive and silly.   You have made a personal choice not to eat meat or animal products.  You should carry a PETA  why vegan pamphlet with you and when someone ask show them this will fix them.  

So for where do you get your protein?

If I told you I would have to kill you might do the trick.

Then the simple I am allergic works too.  

I can't eat that I am allergic.  

Then you get the simpaty Ooh iam sorry.

Good luck on your journey.