Any Advice on how to stop this ?

Question

I am a mature woman and have a problem with a man who keeps playing with himself when he thinks we are alone which i try not to be but any time when he can he will just do this, in front of me i do not want to cause trouble as believe me this would if i said anything,and i do not encourage this at anytime at all, he has told me he has a problem with this and i was so embarrassed that i said i do not want to know as it was his problem, but it is now getting me down and i feel like crying as i cannot say anything to anyone and he is around the family a lot Please don't say i encourage it as i don't as this is a very uncomfortable situation please only sensible replies as i do need some advice,and yes i am old enough to know better but when your in this situation its not so easy.

Answer 1

I consider myself sensible and I am a mature woman so here is my reply.



You are condoning what this pervert is doing so my question to you is why?  I do not understand your logic. Why don't you want to cause trouble? He's the one who will be in trouble, not you.You do not have to be in this situation unless you both live in the same house and even then you do not have to be.

You said he is around the family a lot and since they don't know what this slimeball is doing they probably treat him like a family member. You can do something about this terrible situation but you don't want to or you would have done it by now.

You said you do not encourage him but you are doing exactly that by allowing this piece of garbage to do his thing in front of you. Your not saying anything to anyone is the reason he keeps on doing it. The creep does this when he is alone with you because he can, period. Why would he tell you he has a problem? And what kind of situation are you in that is so bad you cannot tell anybody what the heck is going on? I find it hard to believe there is no one you can go to and you are an adult?  There is something very, very wrong with this picture.

As long as he can get off and you keep quiet it will continue. What advice were you looking for? I believe you know what you should do so do it. If you have grandchildren and they are around this piece of c**p you will have a bigger problem should something go wrong and it will be your fault.

Lady, you are an adult so please act like one. I am not a mean person but as I said before I do not understand your logic.

If I were in your place, thank God I am not, this slimeball would have nothing to play with and I'm not just talking. I can be aggressive when necessary but you sound passive.

Answer 2

I like it when my fella plays with himself, its a turn on.

Answer 3

If the man is not your friend, tell him that his behaviour compels you to stay away from him. If he is an in timate person, tell him how much this bothers you, if he cares, he should stop. All the best.

Answer 4

This man obviously knows this is upsetting for you.  He is trying to get a favourable reaction from you as you said he only does this when he thinks the two of you are alone.   I don't think he has a problem at all.  I think he is using this as an excuse to gauge your reaction.   You need to take the lead here and tell him outright and straight that you find what he is doing is making you feel awkward around him. Tell him that unless he stops behaving in this way around you, you will have no option, but to not be in his company alone.  Don't let this man intimidate you in this way.   You are a mature woman and you must act as such.  Take control of the situation and be firm in your dealings with him.

Answer 5

You must tell someone about this. He is taking advantage of you and he may even testing how far you will let him go. Whatever his motives he is upsetting you and if you are not strong enough to confront him to make him stop, then you must get help. Men cannot stop once they get started so this would be a good time to call another family member to help you get away and that way they will see for themselves how disgusting this man is. I guarrantee he won't hurt you again and with someones help, hopefully he won't do same to anyone else.

Answer 6

I understand that it is a strange situation to be in, i know i would feel just the same as you do. But if it is making you uncomfortable all you can do is maybe talk to him and instead of telling him not to come to some sort of compromise which helps you both out, that way your not upsetting him but it helps you feel better. I hope i have helped xx