Any advice? im kind of scared.?

Question

now first of all I'm not some insane person who needs to go to a nut house. I'm a pretty average teen. I do have depression bi-polar attacks and one thing i get from it is serious suicide thoughts. I don't mean to think of it but sometimes i just think of what if i did..who would care.. It would put me out of misery and the pain would stop.and i catch myself. I hate it and I'm scared. I told my councilor but she didn't do c**p I'm sitting there like help me! and she just goes on and says you'll get over it. (don't worry I'm getting a diff. councilor)

What really got me worried was i was at my godmothers house in her bedroom on her computer checking mail and stuff. My godmother lives down the road from a jail and a prison so she has a gun on her nightstand in case someone escapes and she needs to defend herself i dont approve of it there but anyways all night i had thoughts of just shooting myself. and i almost did. but my godfather came in to get clothes and stayed in there until i left. Im glad he did because i feel like someone else is taking over my body when i think like that.

Any advice or thoughts. There greatly appreciated. thanks for your time.

and please no dumb a** comments or insults. you dont know me and have no right to judge me if you want to go that low then go ahead.

Thanks!

Answer 1

i used to be exactly like you. i always thought, "hey, who the **** would care if i died." but i found out a lot of people would care if i died and i suspect it's the same for you. start hanging out with friends more and you'll see that there are people out there who like you better alive. also since your getting a new councilor you should make it very clear to him/her that your suicidal.

Answer 2

Knowing that you would do yourself injury would make me really sad.  You say that no one cares, but I do and I wish I could see you in person to tell you that you are worth something.  

When babies are made, it is a wonderful miracle from God.  There is no way anyone can ever copy it, since no one can make anything from nothing except God.  Even in the lab, the scientists have to use cells that have already been made to make a "test tube" baby.  Therefore each human life is a unique individual that cannot be copied or done over again.  No one is exactly like you any where else in this world.  For you to end your life, would be a terrible thing because at this age, you would never know what you could have been or even come close to your fulfilling your potential.

Try this for a new perspective.  Take at look at yourself in the mirror.  Yes a real good look.  Note your eyes, nose, hair, mouth, etc. so you could draw your facial features from memory.  Jesus said that He knows the number of hairs on your head.  He knows your thoughts, pain, fears, worries, etc.  He knows you better than you, yourself know you.  He created you and I'm here to tell you that He doesn't make junk.  You are of particular worth to Him, since if you were the only person in the world, He still would have died for you on the cross to give you eternal life.  All you have to do is ask for it.  Paul wrote in 2 Corinthians 5:17 "Therefore if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation.  The old has passed away, behold the new has come".  When you trust in Jesus, He makes you new inside (The outside stays the same.), casting out the old nature and having His Holy Spirit come to indwell you.  If you trust in Him, you don't have to be like you were before.  Try it to see for yourself.

If you do accept Him as your Savior, I look forward to meeting you later in Heaven when He returns to take us home to live with Him forever.

Answer 3

Hey,

Obv. I know you a bit better than most people on here after talking to you and getting to know you.  I think you need to try (and I know how hard it is) to immerse yourself with people who will make you feel good about yourself.  I realise that with bi-polar attacks it makes your emotions ten times stronger than they would be anyway, and this must be very scary for you.  

Its great that you're getting a different councillers - some just don't realise that how you feel *now* matters, not how you might feel in 5,10, 15 years, and they tend to blow the problem off.  Remember you can always talk to me if you need someone to chat to, or if I'm not around, send me an email.  

It might help if you try to look up bi-polar symptoms (you've probably already done that) just to see whether there is anything that can trigger your attacks so you can slow it down and control it better.  Obviously some times it will hit and you won't have control, but if you know more about it that might help you rationalise things.

Keep safe hun and I'll speak to you on aim at some point soon - sorry I haven't been on recently will explain when I talk to you.

I dont know if this is any help but I hope it is.

Jason

Answer 4

I'm glad you are getting a different counsellor. You sound very mature and responsible. could you talk to your Godmother? I do think you need to stay away from the gun just in case. Lots of people have thought like this, you would be missed and you are surely loved; understand that these episodes do not reflect reality. God Bless you.

Answer 5

Not to go all "preacher", but are you a Christian?

I know God has helped me through a lot of rough times, and he can help you.  

http://www.billygraham.org/SH_Howtobecom...

http://www.sbc.net/knowjesus/theplan.asp

If your not a Christian, those websites can help you.

If you just ask God to help you, he will. Trust me.

I really hope I helped you, because your question touched me.

Good luck and make good choices and remember you are special and people and God love you! =D