Any help with foster care adoptions??

Question

My husband and I are interested in adopting a child from foster care. If anybody has any information or experience about this I would really appreciate it. Are you able to specify if you want a closed, open, or semi-open adoption, or is that even a choice? Do you know how often they are at your house or how long the process takes?? Also, we are military and I didn't know if that would be good or bad. We do not feel that we can provide for a child with severe mental/physical handicaps, but we are aware that they will probaly have some behavior or learning disorders. We are wanting to adopt a child (doesn't really matter but prefer a boy) between the ages of 2-4. Thanks for any help!

Answer 1

I can't help you too much with the adoption side of it, but for the foster care part, I think the amount of contact the child has with his/her parents is up to the state department, not the foster parents.

You can pretty much specify in as much detail as you like what age and needs of the child will fit in most comfortably with your home and family.

The best thing to do is to be completely honest and upfront about your needs, and what level of needs you're capable and willing of providing for, as those are details that will have a huge impact on the child who is placed for you.

Here in Australia, we specify what type of care we want to do, so if you're looking to adopt I assume that is the program you'll need to sign up for.

The process over here takes about 9 months on average, I had about 4 or 5 home visits, plus a weeks worth of training.  It depends on how quickly the paperwork moves, and what type of documents you need to provide.

The visits were fine, they want to 'probe' a little bit into your life, obviously, but that's to be expected, but overall the social workers were very friendly and willing to help.  Just be upfront about your needs, and make sure you address any concerns or questions before you get into the swing of it.

Good luck, hope that helps!

Answer 2

I think procedures and laws probably vary somewhat by state, but I can tell you a bit about when I adopted in California.

My son was 2-1/2. We were a 2 parent family at the time (now divorced). We have no other children. My son had been in foster care since birth. His should have been a fast track adoption because of some history, but it wasn't, thank God, or we wouldn't have ended up being the ones to adopt him. Anyway, we made our initial inquiry in October 2001 and were placed in a MAPP class (required by the county of Los Angeles) that began in May 2002. I don't remember how long MAPP lasted -- a couple of months, I guess. During that time we had to be fingerprinted and take CPR and First Aid classes (we took them through the Red Cross). When MAPP was completed, we started our paperwork. That took *forever*. I think we turned it in in Dec. 2002/Jan. 2003. We were first matched with a child in March 2003 but that fell through before we even met her due to a family member resurfacing unexpectedly. The little girl went to live with her grandfather and we were put back on the list.

In June 2003 we were contacted about a 2 year old boy. We met with his social worker 2 weeks after our initial notification and we met him 6 days after that. We had 10 visits with him (one of them overnight at our house) prior to bringing him home with us for good.  :)  His birth mother's rights were terminated at the end of October 2003, so until then my son had weekly visits with her, which I took him to. I was not allowed to make contact with my son's birth mother (social worker's request).

My son's adoption is closed and I believe all foster-adoptions in Los Angeles are as well. I could be wrong about that.

BE HONEST on your application! If you don't feel that you can handle a child with certain disabilities, don't check the box for "yes" or "maybe." As for behavior or learning disorders (or any other handicap for that matter), you can't possibly know about most of them even if you give birth to a child. Behavior and learning disabilities don't generally surface until a child starts school, so if you end up adopting a child aged 2-4 (as you stated is your preference), you won't know about any school difficulties the child may have down the line.

Answer 3

Adoptions through foster care are all closed here in Alberta. I have no clue about where you are but thought I would add in the laws as they stand here.

Answer 4

We went through this process is Texas.  We did not find it particularly difficult or invasive.  

- It took us 2 years from starting the process to the final adoption.  We were also looking to adopt medium to low demand children under 5.  We ended up adopting brothers, two great little boys.  They were removed from their mother due to drug use and general neglect.

- We worked with an agency that contracts through the state to train foster/adoptive parents and to conduct home studies.  We had to attend classes on parenting, first aid, drug administration, and the legal issues surrounding fostering and adopting.  We also had to take 'refresher' classes each year to maintain our Foster status.  

- We had to have inspections by the fire department, the health department, and the foster home licensing board.  We were worried about these, but they were pretty easy.  However, there are some horror stories of citations for minor issues like expired food in your pantry or ant hills in your yard.  It depends on your inspector.

- The Home Study is a visit and interview by the agency.  They go over your background, your medical and financial health, and your general reasons for adopting.  They will ask some pretty personal questions and can be pretty intense.  However, if your are more or less 'together', it shouldn't be a problem.

- While fostering, we had regular visits from several people involved with the case, such as the boys' case worker, guardian, and attorney.

- There is a fair amount of paper work involved while fostering.  For example, if you travel with the kid(s), you have to submit a permission form.  But, this is pretty manageble.

- We fostered several kids before getting the boys.  These were all temporary placements, so, we never had the disappointment of hoping to adopt and then having it fall through.

- When we did get the boys, we were told that adoption was a 50/50 likelihood.  We had several 'hairy' moments when it looked like we would not be able to adopt, but in the end, we did.  

Don't listen to the horror storys about the process.  I am sure it can be tough sometimes, but every case I know of personally has gone almost as smooth as ours did.

Edit - Here, in Texas, while in foster, birth parents usually have visitation rights, unless they have been taken away for some reason.  After adoption, the birth parent cannot contact the child or the adoptive parents unless the adoptive parents allow it (this is like a restraining order).  In many cases, the birth parents are encouraged to set up a mail drop and the adoptive parents are asked to occasionally send photos and letters.  (Our adoption was recent and we haven't decided yet if we will do this or not).

Answer 5

We did / are doing foster to adopt!  Get ready for the ride of your life if the parents still have rights!  It's a lot of up's and downs.  Worth it to no end, don't get me wrong...but sometimes we just want to scream!  With you being military, it would be best to get a child who does not have tie's still left with family as you can not move a child out of state who is a "ward of the state" until they are legally yours.  There is a mandatory 6 month waiting period once the child moves into your home, then you can request a court hearing to permanately adopt the child, then you may move him / her / them!  Foster care adoptions should be looked at more often as there are so many children.  We to only wanted boys and under the age of 5!  So far we have gotten three, two of which still live with us and one we are looking good into adopting soon!

Answer 6

With my experience:

Yes you are able to specify if you want a closed or open adoption, even though most foster care adoptions agencies will encourage the child or children to stay in contact with their other siblings and/or relatives so sometimes there isn't a choice.  The process can take over a year.  A lot of paperwork, homestudies and finding a child that suits your family.  The agency determines the type of child for you.  Being military I don't know if that will be good, especially if you are constantly moving.  All of these foster care children will have some type of behavior problem and will require counseling.  Good luck!

Answer 7

You can check with the state that you live in. They have children that are in need of a home. You will have to take parenting classes, go through home studies, have your fingerprints taken for the FBI and some other things. If you adopt through the state then they will pay for your kids college, daycare and medical. You two will also recieve a monthly check to help with the finances. As for the adoption the United for Children or DCF will be present. We were able to invite who we wanted to our childrens adoption. I chose not to have the birth parents there. We also have pics with the judge. The amount of time depends. It should take less than a year. The state visits your house for a few min. once  to twice a month until your adoption is final. I am sure there will be a trial period to make sure that you guys are all compatible. This is how it worked for us in FL. The military can be an amazing way for your family to travel together. I think the important thing is that you are all close so when you move it wont be so hard on the kid moving away from friends. I wish you the very best of luck.