Any news from the garden party at Buckingham palace last weekend?

Question

What did you think of Lady Hyacinth's gown? Did Sir Marmelade recover from the unfortunate incident with the angry swan? Which morsel did you enjoy most from the finger buffet? Did you enjoy my performance on Lord Effingham's prized organ?

Answer 1

Never got invited, just because that sillyass Rotter dropped his trousers at last years do and I guffawed and past wind in front of Phil.

Answer 2

That Swan got his comeuppence. Top tip - swan goes very well with redcurrant sauce.

Answer 3

I can't remember,I lost my undergarments and passed out as usual.

Answer 4

Pity about Sir Marmelade... but it was a jolly good wheeze watching him being chased into the koi carp pond, what?

I can't really comment on the finger buffet... I have this terrible phobia of foods not served with a knife and fork, you see.  

And your performance on the organ was quite possibly the best I have ever heard.

Answer 5

Your an idiot

Answer 6

Lady Hyacinth should eschew puce; does the most dreadful things with her complexion, which is rather sallow to begin with...Sir Marmelade is recovering at his estate very nicely, sent some calf's foot jelly over this morning by special envoy, and my favorite finger edible was the caviar toast points with creme fraiche...your performance on his Lordship's prized organ was most mellifluous and allow me to offer you my most heartfelt thank you for entertaining so beautifully and adding that certain, but rarefied, "je ne sais quoi" to the diverssement.

Answer 7

Oh Drat! Missed it again? I was with the Sheik in Falujah. I do wish I could have enjoyed your performance but, alas, I may as well be on the otherside of the moon.

Answer 8

Gosh, old thing. I was so inebriated I had totally forgotten the details of said shindig.

I think I shall be keeping a low profile round that way after I vomited eight gin and tonics and a cucumber sandwich over Lady Hyacinth's gown. Though I seem to recall it only improved that bloody awful frock.

Thats the Knighthood out the window, too, I suspect.