Any one adopted their baby out and regreted it, and do you remember the babies birthday date?

Question

Any one adopted their baby out and regreted it, and do you remember the babies birthday date?

Answer 1

November 29, 1994 at 9:20 am, 5lbs 3oz, 16 inches long, head circumference 15 inches, born 7 weeks 4 days early, spent 3 weeks, 3 days and 7 hours in NICU came home just in time for his first Christmas weighing 5lbs 4oz and 17.5 inches long.

Yeah I remember it all and I will always regret his adoption.

Answer 2

I was bullied by family and the agency, so yes, I regret trusting these people who are supposed to care and assist a 16 year old and instead just lied about everything.  Yes, I remember his birthdate and in fact, it was how I found his page on the Internet as it apparently was an uncommon birthday.  We have been in contact.

I wanted to add that according to researchers who work with first parents, it is not uncommon for the mother or father to forget not only the baby's birthdate but birth year.  It is due to trauma.  I imagine it is incredibly heartbreaking as many parents of teenagers were instructed by these institutions to destroy the adoption papers so that they aren't around to remind the girl that she had a baby.  It was actually to eliminate the paper trail.

Answer 3

35 years later. In reunion for over 8 years. Remembered the day before and the day after her birthday for the first 10 years. I do believe it was an internal protection system for me.

My daughter got a good home with good parents. She was happy and spoiled.

I have a great relationship with my daughter now and still regret every day I spent away from her.  

I regret not being able to parent her.

I REGRET LYING ABOUT HER FATHERS NAME ON HER OBC.  

I regeret her not knowing her father.

I regret that her father didn't get to know her (until recently)

I regret that she never knew her grand parents, aunts uncles, and cousins.

I regret her not knowing where things came from like her personality, her temper, her nose.

I regret that she never had access to her medical or ancestry information.

I regret that she is classified as a second class citizen.

I regret that because of me she can't have her original birth certificate.

Even though I stand by my decision and my daughter and i both think it was a wise choice at the time.

I will always have regrets.

Answer 4

Yes, I did and of course I remember her birthday, only now I get to talk to her on her birthday and send her a gift. Her birthdays used to be so hard.

Answer 5

Yes I regret having to make the decision I had to make and I hope that he has a great life.His birthday is 08/22/90.I gave him his first name,but they changed his name.

Answer 6

I placed a son for adoption 3 years ago this July, and no, I do not "regret" what I did, simply because I did what I knew was best for him at that time. I miss him, and I feel sad that I had to do what I did, but regret? Not at all. And yes, I do remember his birthdate: Jaylen was born Tuesday, July 19, 2005, via cesarean section at 6:59am. He was 7 lbs., 15.9 ozs. and was 21 inches long. I will never forget him, and I hope that he knows that I love him very very much.

Answer 7

I remember her birthday, I remember everything about her birth, I remember how it felt to be pregnant with her.  25 years have passed and I still remember it all as if it happened yesterday.

I understand what the previous person meant about being disloyal to the person their child became.  I think I would have preferred the person my child did not have the chance to become.  And there is nobody to blame but myself.  

Regret?  Every moment.

Answer 8

My son was born on June 11, 2007 at 6:07 pm.  He was 8 lbs 7oz.  I miss him.  I feel sad sometimes when I see babies his age, and their moms getting to hold them whenever they want.  But I don't regret it.  I don't think I made the wrong decision.  I still get to see him.  I love his adoptive parents.

Answer 9

I remember the day.  I used to look in the local newspapers to see if I saw an announcement of her birthday every year.  One year I got lucky and I saw her picture.  I knew it was her because she looked just like me.  Her name is Jeanette and she looked happy.  I still miss her and I wish I would have been better educated and I would have made better choices.

Answer 10

I regret getting pregnant.  But adoption was the best choice at that moment.

Answer 11

August 16 2007, 4:16 p.m 8 pounds even, 21 inches. United Regional Hospital...Dr. Lamar

Placed in her adoptive families arms September 22, 2007

If you made your choice for the right reasons and truly believe it was the right choice you will never regret it...it broke my heart to give my baby girl away, i still think about her everyday and my heart aches to hold her. but i wouldnt take it back for anything, i choose this family who love her so much and are able to give her the life i never could have. And now she is more loved that most, since she has not one but two mommys that would do anything for her. i know that she is where she is supossed to be..

Answer 12

i have placed a child for adoption, no regrets just missing her. Her birthday is Feb. 19th 2007...

Answer 13

Seriously now.  Do you honestly think that a woman could birth a child and not remember that baby's birthday date?  Possible yes, probable not really.

Regret comes hand in hand with loss.  It also is a very taboo word for mothers like me.  We aren't supposed to regret our choice to relinquish by society's standards.

Edit to add:  Many of those who answer that they don't have regrets about relinquishing are typically those rather new to relinquishment.  I know for me it wasn't until just a few years ago that I even dared to think I regretted what happened.  It felt like saying that was a betrayal to the person my son is now and saying I wished for the person he didn't become.  That's what I mean about the whole taboo part of stating regret.

Answer 14

Yes i always have a little amount of regret about giving my daughter up but I know that what I did was for the best at the time.As far as remembering her birthdate of course I do and you will find that women always remember these things and that it doesn't matter whether the particular child is with them or not.Just for the record I remember the day my son was stillborn as well as for me both of these children are as important to me as the two that I have with me today as well as my grandchildren

Answer 15

I placed a baby girl up for adoption May 17, 2005. Ella- the name her adoptive parents gave her- will be 3 on the 14th of this month, regrets-never....sadness-yes but it turns to happiness when I see how much she is loved by her parents. It is an open adoption so I am still involved in her life. i will never forget the day I gave birth to that beautiful baby girl.