Any opinions on this poem?

Question

Going Somewhere

People going somewhere

destinations unknown

vacations,

business trips,

or just

trying to get home.

Some in groups

others alone;

all kinds of people

all on the roam,

going and going

to all kinds of places

a million destinations

and a million faces.

And none of them smile;

they all seem to be lost

in the journey.

Answer 1

Toss out the last three lines and you've got a winner. Sounds like something Shel Silverstein would write.

Answer 2

Sounds like your either at the LA airport or the Atlanta Ga airport- and so typical of people and looks of being lost and not knowing where to go!!!

Great poem, enjoyed it !!Cheers !!

Answer 3

I think you need to add a few lines at the end, the other two segments were nice and detailed and then just the three lines at the end-seems like it needs some more there

Answer 4

it sounds very sad, like a pessimistic view on life.

Answer 5

'tis the life of the commuter. I would often take the train to work, this explains quite vividly what I experienced, on the journey.

However, looking at the larger picture... this is us on our daily journey through life, I can only hope that we are conscious in the moment, to acknowledge and enjoy all that is.

Much love always,

Temari

Answer 6

I like the overall poem, and the idea. I just don't like how you ended it. It's not because it doesn't rhyme, it's just, that last part really sticks out. I guess that's a good thing, when you look at it. :) Good job !

Answer 7

:) makes me think of my life.. not in a bad way, just in a content sort of way :)

If you wrote it, your fairly talented :) \

xx thanks, good read.

Answer 8

Could be most any where, but would like to think the view,

is from a busy, confusing airport! Kudos.

Answer 9

I liked all but the ending. You need to add a little more to it, it doesn't balance out. I would add "In the journey of life there is always a frost." meaning thing never do go the way you expect them to go. It just seems to flow a little better with a little more added to it. But it is a pretty good poem,except the ending.

Answer 10

Did you wright that because who ever did is pretty amazing! That rocks I love it. It's like it has a deeper meaning to it. Like a read between the lines thing!!