Any tips on how to be a happier mom?

Question

Sometimes I find myself easily agitated (I have a 3 yr. old daughter) and get so angry I could scream. Then I look back at my behavior/feelings and feel bad about it, and tend to dwell on it, feeling like such a bad mom. I have a tendency to dwell on any little thing that bothers me in general....any wise words to put things in perspective and make me become a happier easy-going mom?

Answer 1

First, realize that you aren't a bad mom just because you feel like you're at the end of your rope. It happens. A lot. Especially at that age :-) Your daughter isn't going to hate you, and you shouldn't either.

The single best thing you can do is hire a babysitter once a week and either go out with your husband/boyfriend/partner or your girlfriends. You need to realize that your life is still important. You need to talk to other adults, if only to exchange parenting advice. I promise, you will feel so much better and happier looking forward to "Mommy Time" every week. Get your hair done, get a massage, just go for a drive - it lets you clear your mind, think things through, etc., so when you come home, you feel fresh and ready to wade into the chaos again!

It gets easier the more children you have, believe it or not. The stress level will be higher, true, but you'll also be a lot more comfortable dealing with it, since you've gone through it before.

Answer 2

This is something that we mothers go through.  And like you, I always feel guilty about it.  Honestly, depending on how agitated you find yourself becoming, you may try going for a walk or somehow disengaging yourself from the situation.  Maybe that will work for you.  However, having said that, I didn't have this option and found myself at my wits end.  I saw my doctor who prescribed zoloft and it has made such a huge difference for me.  I'm more patient, less irritable, feel less anxious and just all the way around feel better.  This may or may not be right for you but you may check into it.  But don't feel like a bad mother.  We all have these moments.  It's part of raising children.

Answer 3

You are not alone...  It helps to take some time for yourself and get away with a good friend or your husband once in awhile..  When you start feeling stressed don't go with the feeling - take a step back and look at yourself... remind yourself that she IS only 3...  also remind yourself of how it makes you feel after the fact of how you react with her..

Answer 4

Zoloft!! My dr prescribed it for me. I take it 2 weeks out of thew month (start day 14 of cycle) it really helps calm me down and keep me from ripping peoples heads off.

Answer 5

I think the most important thing to remember is that even though you are a mom, and of course your child is very important to you - you are still an individual person and need to have time to do things that you enjoy.

Make the time to dedicate to yourself by getting your husband/bf/friend/babysitter to take your daugter for the day and:

- go out with girlfriends

- go shopping for YOU!

- go for a run or do some other physical activity

- see a movie

Or whatever you used to before you had kids. You need to take time to recharge your batteries. Then by the end of your "me time" you'll feel re-energized.