Anybody else feel like this and what should I do?

Question

I hate waking up in the morning because I feel like I'm living the same dreadful day over and over. I'm a stay at home mom with a 3 and 4 year old. I feel like I live my life for everybody else, and I can't even remember what makes me happy anymore. HELP! But please no meds. or doctors!

Answer 1

Having kids definitely takes away a lot of your time. If you can try to hire a babysitter and do some of the things that enjoyed before. If that doesn't work try to find a new hobby. I would definitely recommend hiring a babysitter so you can have some alone time. If you can't afford a babysitter than try to do some activities that you think you may enjoy with the kids or engage them in an activity that they wouldn't need that much supervision and go off and do your own thing. I hope this helps but I am pretty sure it will.

Answer 2

you need to get interested in something you love. For example: If you always wanted to become a ballerina take evening dance classes. Have something to look forward to that is for you. Have time to yourself often because it will help you to be a better mom. Best of luck and don't feel so down!

Answer 3

Sounds like you need a break from children . get someone to care for them for a weekend or longer if possible . Get yourself some adult time . You'll get your perspective back.

Answer 4

I'm sure that you are a great mother, but time devoted to yourself will make you an even better one!  Think of something you are really interested in doing (whether it's taking a walk, learning to paint, riding a bike, taking a part-time job, or socializing) and see if there is a way to make it happen.  I am not sure if you have the financial resources to get a babysitter or regular childcare for your children, but if you can get some "you" time, do it!  And make sure it is time spent doing something you LOVE.  You will not only be in a better mental and emotional state in caring for your children, you will be modeling self-care as well!  Good luck!  

Answer 5

Sounds like you are feeling a bit desperate hun. Do you have any help with your children or anybody you could call from time to time to give you some space? Parents, or family? Any close friends you could offload a bit and maybe talk to?

Its so hard being on your own with pre-school children sometimes and I know how it can send you a bit doolally, I have children too and you really time out for yourself sometimes to keep your sanity and to stay happy, as your children will pick up on you being unhappy.

You really need to try and break the cycle if you can and do something different and come out of your comfort zone a bit. Maybe you could find out about some childrens clubs locally or maybe even see about getting your children into a nursery for a couple of hours a day, just to give you some time to concentrate on something you want to do, or even just watch a film or read a book, spend the time to think about what you want to do with the rest of your life, make plans if you can as dont forget you will have a bit of your life back soon when your kids start school and that will come around so quickly. Your life is far from over, it just sometimes feels that way hun.

It might be an idea to contact your health visitor who will have tons of information on local support networks that might be able to help you, that is whats they are there for, to help and support.

I know that you said you dont want help with doctors or medication, and I totally understand as I am the same (been there done that) It just seems to be the norm now, for doctors to prescribe pills when its not always necessary, but I would consider this. If you are truly finding it hard to function and to put any of the above ideas into practice, it could be a sign that you have some kind of depression and you may benefit from talking about it to a doctor who may be able to arrange some kind of therapy or suggest ways to help yourself. It doesn't have to be medication, but please consider it.

I dont know if you have a partner or if you do what kind of relationship you have with him, but try and talk to him about how you are feeling. They are his children too, and he might just need to pull his weight a little bit more with the children as its all too easy sometimes for the partner who is working to leave all the child isues to the one who is at home without necessarily realising it.

I wish you luck hunny, I hope you feel better soon.

Answer 6

Mix things up. Try going to the park with some friends with all the kids. Or treat yourself by getting a babysitter and going out. Just try to relax and try new things. When you wake up, instead of thinking about a boring day, think of it as a new adventure of trying new things. This is all about how you wire your brain to think. Think POSITIVE!