Anybody got any tips for raising gifted child?

Question

My son is three and very bright, he can do his times tables, read.Count in spanish and french. but he has trouble relating to children his own age, he understands how to share but gets very frustrated when his peers don't understand his games. he's fine with older kids and he's not autistic. i'm just worried what will happen when he goes to school. i don't want him to get bullied the way i was. but i don't want him to play up because he's bored help!

Answer 1

If you are able to homeschool through his school years, that would likely be the best option. He can connect with other kids through library story times (even gifted kids who are excellent readers love to hear a story!).  He is still young, and many children his age don't really connect with peers. Once he is 4 to 4.5 he will be able to be more social. Take him to the park where he can meet kids. Teach him to let his playmates take the lead in games sometimes.

Don't tell him he is smarter or brighter than other kids. If he is, he will figure it out on his own. When he asks why he can multiply when his friend Johnny is still learning to count to 100, tell him it is because he worked very hard to learn it. This is true. If he asks why Johnny didn't work as hard, tell him Johnny is interested in something different. This will help your son not feel (and act) superior to his playmates and he will get along with them better. He can be proud of his accomplishments (as he should be) without putting down his friends. I learned this when my daughter was very young, and it has served her well. One more thing, as he grows and interacts more with kids, he will likely have some social problems. What we have been doing for years is discussing situations. When my daughter was in school, she would come home and tell me about a situation at school, like a classmate teasing her. I would ask her what she did, and if it worked for her. If she didn't handle it well, I'd ask her what she thinks she could do differently next time she is in that situation. If she cannot come up with an appropriate response, I will give her ideas and she will decide how to handle it next time. This took a lot of effort from me as she would have situations to discuss nearly every day for years. Now it is only a couple a week. It is worth the effort on your part, as doing this will help your son very much. It is also perfectly normal for your son to have playmates that are older or younger than himself.

Answer 2

With a very bright child, you need to follow him.  Take your cues from him, I'm not saying let him run the show, but follow his interests.  As far as school goes, there is a lot to learn other than books, learning to live with and enjoy people is very important.  I consider the education that a child gets dealing with people, teachers, peers, etc just as important if not more important than book learning.  So while your child is in school, remember that there is more than book learning going on.  The hardest thing for an intellect to learn is happiness.  And finally, an esteemed educator once told me that failing is an opportunity to learn, don't just concentrate on the areas in life in which your son suceeds, sports, people, not getting your way all the time are all learning experiences and looking for experiences like these will be more important to your child than treating him like a book consuming factory.  Look for experiences where your child can fail and learn to deal with failure.

Answer 3

Many parents tend to believe that their normally intelligent child is a genius or gifted. Well, (I'm not saying your son is not). BUT in many cases children hear these comments from their parents and they do feel and act different from other children. First,  you have to get him evaluated to find out IQ (psychologist opinion is very important) then from there you make decisions on what schools are good for him. Public Schools by law should provide your son with the appropriate education  according to evaluation results.

NOW , believe me SOCIAL SKILLS if it is not the most important component to the development of the self. You need to work on that.

I know this young man who is very very smart and has many degrees , but he has no social skills !!! NO ONE has hired him in years!!! He can't survive through interviews.

Good Luck with your son !!!!!

______________________________________...

Some young man (Wrote)suggested:

YOU MUST NOT NEVER NEVER EVER EVER EVER let your son SKIP A GRADE. THAT IS A MISTAKE YOU WILL REGRET._________________________________...

I agree with him 100%

Answer 4

I feel your frustration as my son, now 17 had a rough time in grade school. Preschool was fine as I went the Montessori route, then we did a few years of private because they were willing to allow him to work at his rate in math but when we decided to hit public school it was disaster because the kids were breaking pencils on their foreheads and he was calculating the testile strength and they called him weird. He told the teachers they were wrong on minute details which most of us don't care about but he obsessed on their errors. By 5th grade miserable.

I shopped around and moved into a district which had a gifted self-contained that helped him rebuild his self esteem. Looking back I wished I had put him on teams and stuck with a sport for the social interaction. I would have sought out a small church or private school which could address his unique learning style. I would have worked harder to invite friends over so he had a "best" friend. And I would have bought a computer "police" which allows you to program the computer to limit the time spent there!

Ironically by H.S he has met friends and found his niche but just this year decided to drop the international baccalaureate program because he wants to fit in socially senior year. He's a nerd, but a happier one and I was always so thrilled that he did so well academically that I didn't see that he was so unhappy being teased and was such a loner all through elementary.

Answer 5

Exposure is very important for any child, but especially for children who tend to isolate themselves from their peers. Try setting up play dates and explain to your little boy that there will be other children there his own age and that you will be there talking with the other mommies and you're going to stay for a certain length of time...(keep in mind that a certain unit of "time" isn't very clear to a 3 year-old, so use something like "we will leave after we eat lunch" or "after we have birthday cake..." whatever the situation may be.) Is he in preschool? If so, talk to his teacher and see if there are any other GT children in his class. He or she might be able to relate to your son a little more easily and make the transition easier. Also, children by the age of 3 will play "together," but don't expect them to REALLY interact until age 6 or 7. Being in a structured environment will help tremendously... look into GT preschools or play clubs for the GT...the more he is in school or other structured environment, having to rely on his own abilities to make friends, the more he will learn about other kids and himself. Don't be discouraged...this is more common than you might think.

Answer 6

you can send him to private school or a magnet school

Answer 7

First of all, I was just like your son. I was so smart and different.

In my district, there used to be a gifted and talented program. You had to take a state test with qualifing scores to attend. There, I met many people that was about or above my level.

( I got all A+'s in fourth grade). There, I made friends.

YOU MUST NOT NEVER NEVER EVER EVER EVER let your son SKIP A GRADE. THAT IS A MISTAKE YOU WILL REGRET!

Otherwise, go to a private school, or a town/city where a lot of asians (im asian im not being racist) live. Not because asians are natrually born smart, but their parent, woo, are STRICT. My parents made me do 2 hours of addition and subtraction everyday when I was four. That way, your son can communicate better with people of his level.

Hope this is helpful.

Oh yeah, tell your son that if he is three and already can do his times tables, he is A GENUIS!!!

Answer 8

I was labled gifted as well, though probably not to such a degree. Your child needs to find his place in the world. When it's time to put him in school, see about a school with a program for highly gifted children. A full time program is best in my opinion, but some say a part time program helps him learn to cope with people below his level as well as those at or above it. Grade skipping is another option, but not all schools are open to it. You mustn't dismiss the idea of alternative education either. Homeschooling does WONDERS for gifted children as long as you find ways to involve him in the community as well. Check out the homeschool section on here, or just find some books or websites about homeschooling gifted children. I myself am homeschooled and have been since the beginning of highschool. (I would have started sooner, but we were worried about all those steriotypes glued to homeschoolers.) There are also private and charter schools, online programs offered through private schools or even universities for gifted youth, camps he can attend (outside of school), etc.

A great book to read is The Gifted Kid's Survival Guide

I'm afraid the author's name escapes me, but look it up on Amazon or eBay. There's a similar volume by the same author for parents of gifted youngsters as well. Definitely an important read! Good luck!