Anyone have a child diagnosed with aspergers but at times its hard to fully believe the diagnosis?

Question

I know my son is "quirky" and socially different, I accept that he has aspergers 90% of the time, it's just that to me it seems like such a subjective thing- I guess a label doesn't really matter, but it's just hard at times to say to myself "Yes, he is on the autistic spectrum and has aspergers" Just wondering.

Answer 1

You need to be the advocate for your son-- be his voice. It will be hard for others to accept your son's quirks and behaviors if you are having trouble with it. I don't have a child that has Asperger's but I am a one-on-one paraprofessional for a child that does have it. I am constantly amazed by him. He really isn't any different than the other kids in his class he just needs some extra help on things--making friends is a huge one. I don't point out all the things that he can't do but I do make sure to remind him of all the things that he can do. I'm sure that it is difficult to accept the diagnosis but the best thing that you can do for your son is to accept it and get him the support he needs. He may have a 'label' but he can still have a full, successful life. Keep your chin up and good luck! :)

Answer 2

I can understand where a negative label is very hurtful at times, especially when it is applied to someone special to you.  Just because someone says he has Aspergers doesn't mean his social skills will not develop.  What you know about him and what everyone else who meets him thinks of him may be quite different.  When I was at university many of our brilliant professers were "different" and, looking back, it is likely several had Aspergers.  They were quite successful, even if not outgoing and personable.  

You're right that the label is subjective and the numbers of children diagnosed in the autistic spectrum is growing very rapidly.  Whether this is because of new awareness or whether there is some over diagnosing going on is hard to say.  

Either way, the label is on his chart or inside your head but not plastered across his chest for everyone to see.  Keep working with him as best you can and you may likely be pleasantly surprised at how well your son can develop.

Answer 3

Aspergers is such a mild form of autism that some people may have awkward social tendencies but not be diagnosed. Personally, I would rather be diagnosed so I could reap the benefit of an IEP and other modifications in school. It can be hard to grasp but remember that it could be a lot worse.

Answer 4

I have an 11 year old nephew with Asperger's. He is very intelligent, but socially inept! He was invited to Duke University's TIP Program, so he is as smart as a whip. He can tell you about anything about science/history/math, but ask the kid to ask another kid to play catch and he doesn't have a clue.

As for someone who said Asperger's is a mild form of Autism, while they are on the same spectrum it's not a mild form. Granted, usually those with Asperger's are verbal and very intelligent so it would seem to be "better" than Autism or not as severe, but it has a totally different host of problems.

Not really sure about the question, but yes having a child with Asperger's or Autism is not easy...

Answer 5

Unfortunately, almost any diagnosis is transient and can change from one observer to another.  The idea of Autism spectrum (like aspergers) is just that...a spectrum, like a rainbow.  No two people will see the exactly the same color and it *is* very subjective.

Since it is a spectrum, however, it allows for a wide variety of symptoms...some are milder or more profound than others.  It sounds like you're seeing that variation.

The 'aspie' kids I've met have been a little 'nerdy' but very intelligent which resulted in some some very interesting discussions.

Good luck