Are any other women fickle in this way?

Question

My female best friend baffles me; one day she's really affectionate and touchy-feely, inviting physical attention & contact, yet the next she'll be about as tactile as a porcupine, offering no affection and subtly cutting short any attempted contact, even though she appears to be in much the same happy 'pleased to be with me' mood (eg. not sulking). It's not a big deal as such, but it irritates me not knowing which version I'll get or why. Does anyone else experience this?

Answer 1

Sounds like she may have a mood disorder, or just moody in general. She may want to consider counseling, but that needs to be up to her.

I have a mood disorder, but I'm in counseling and my husband is helping me through this. He has Bipolar and really understands where I'm coming from.

Before I thought I was just moody in general. But now after reasearching, I know it's more to it. Some people are just dramatic and want attention.

Answer 2

Maybe you get on her nerves certain days & certain days you don't.  Who knows?  I can go from pleasant to b*tch in about 2.5 seconds so maybe we're just like that.

Answer 3

I grew up with two - Lindsay and Anna. *sigh* I decided to "walk on eggshells" around them and feel them out so I know which version I get.  

Answer 4

She's a female...  Expect it. It happens, we can't control it. Men need to learn to live with it!

Answer 5

yes - "la donna e mobile"

Answer 6

Let me guess: these "periods" of not wanting to be touched last about 3-5 days, and roll around every month or so, right?

Answer 7

My mind automatically goes to BI Polar symptoms.  Or she needs to have a hormonal check up.

Answer 8

May be she has deep feelings for you and she feels you will hurt her, as you may have hurt her in the past. Its just she being trying not to get hurt.

Answer 9

People are just people.  You have two choices.  You can either accept her for who she is and expect the unexpected or you can view her as toxic.

Either way, tell her how you feel about her treatment of you.  You need to decide if her friendship is really worth it.  If a friendship is not uplifting, motivating, healthy then I let it go.  

There is too much toxicity in the world as it is. Life is too short to have to walk on egg shells because you don't know what kind of mood is going to hit you.  It's not healthy for you.

Answer 10

um, you said female best friend. well friends arnt touch-feely etc. so to me it sounds like sometimes she wants that from you and sometimes she doesnt. theres no clear line  with you guys between just friends and possible intimacy. The days shes more "withdrawn" shes not feeling physically connected to you - just friendly.  On her part, she needs to figure it out. cant have it both ways.

  On your part, you need to decide is she your friend or more?