Are drunken words really sober thoughts?

Question

The guy I've been seeing for a long time has issues admitting his feelings ( I know a lot of people do) we've talked about this sober..He's sweet to me when we're sober, pretty affectionate and he says he cares for me. He's not a very touchy feely person, and likes his space, especially in a relationship. When he's drunk, I seriously can't get off the couch to go pee without him right with me, or banging on the bathroom door waiting for me to come back (it's quite funny) he has told me he loved me, and he's told me his feelings for me are way stronger then he's ready to admit yet. He talks about marriage and commitment and all the things he's too freaked out to talk about sober. We have great conversations when sober, but drunk he really says some things that I don't think he'd ever say sober. (BTW we're not kids, we started dating when I was 22 and he 26 on and off..now I'm 26 and he's 30 and we decided to try and make it more serious this time, not just casual dating) Do you think some people really can't just express their feelings without alcohol? or is he just drunk and thinks he feels this strong when he doesn't?

Answer 1

The words "when he's drunk" sends alarm bells ringing. Do NOT marry this guy.

Answer 2

i think that most people express their feelings when drunk, i know i do. i always tell people exactly how i am feeling when i am drunk, even if i never would when sober.

Answer 3

Great question! I think you've already answered it yourself, though. In my experience, people who are drunk, on drugs, etc. let out their honest feelings because they have no inhibitions while in that state of mind. So basically, if they are feeling a certain way subconsciously, it will come out consciously while intoxicated because there is no barrier (ie: fear, nervousness, etc).

I've been in a similar situation, and had the same thing happen. It was weird to me, but it taught me a valuable lesson. I've never drank alcohol or done drugs in my life!

You get a star!

Answer 4

I find people, even myself, can be much more blunt, and sometimes plain rude when they're drunk- I think your phrase "drunken words are sober thought" is fitting to many people, potentially your partner if he feels he can cover subjects such as marriage whilst drunk if he's too afraid to do it sober. The alcohol will give you the confidence. . . and sometimes you can't help it. . . like word vomit!