Are learning disabilities like ADD or ADHD just copouts?

Question

I agree with that one dude that stated that 90% of those kids are just brats. Parenting has gotten so slack that kids get away with murder in the classroom and outside the home. When all of the vandalism and stupid petty crimes are taking place, where are these bozos parents??

Answer 1

Maybe for your parents it was.  However, I know many people with ADD or ADHD who have worked hard and made something of themselves.  Heck, I married one.

I do realize that many children are misdiagnosed.  However, the people who truly suffer from learning disabilities would love to have a private word with morons who say that what they have is a copout.

Answer 2

No.  

Answer 3

Yes, there is a difference between an undisciplined child and a child with ADD or ADHD.  These are neurological disorders that are diagnosed using highly specific criteria and treated through multi-modal means through a team of the doctor, school, and parents..  Children who commit crimes do not necessarily have these disorders and it should never be associated with, or used as a cause for criminal activities.  Just because someone has add or adhd does not mean they are prone to criminal behavior.  Yes, we have a lot of parents who have "fallen down on the job" and make my job as a teacher much harder.  However, your question involves completely separate issues.

Answer 4

They're not just copouts.

ADD is like trying to watch TV when the channels are changing every 2 seconds.

A day of that and you'd be climbing the walls.  These kids live that every day of their lives.

ADHD is like trying to watch the TV channels changing every 2 seconds while you're doped up on speed.

Answer 5

Not cop outs but some kids may be just unruly.  ADD & ADHD do interfere with a kid's concentration in and out of class and there are thousands of true stories about how kids, some using prescribed medication and some with instructions regarding how to compensate for their issues, suceed in life, in academics and in the world.  It does a disservice to generalize about this and there is a huge body of science and experience that supports legitimate ADD and ADHD and how they interfere with a kids' conduct in school and at home.

Answer 6

It is an excuse for poor parenting. Sorry to all of you who have these problem kids or if you are one yourself, but it really is just an excuse for bad parenting.

All kids would be like this but they learn to control themselves - because their parents and teachers make them.

End of.

Answer 7

My x-step nephew Mat, oh man, He was such a brat. supposedly had ADHD or ADD, OPP or what ever made up name the quacks make up. I personally think it's mostly in peoples heads. Parents need to discipline there kids more. I can't stand when a kid is acting out and crying obsessively, just because their not getting there way. But 20 years ago they would just say that kid is spoiled, now they use these terms such at ADD ADHD and so on, and what gets me is the parents say, (Oh, the doctor said my kid will grow out of it). Well, I guess so, the kid has to grow up sometime in it's life and come to realize he/she can't get their way all the time. But when I hear someone say oh my, my kid has ADD, and my kid has to take meds. I'm thinking, yeah go a head and drug your kid up so your kid grows up to be a crack head. People stop spoiling your children, that's one of the reason your kid acts the way he/she acts. It's just an out for the kids behavior, the parents can just say oh, my kid has ADHD or ADD. No, your kid is just a spoiled little brat.

I tried telling Mat's mother Sherrie (my brothers x-wife) that, and she didn't want to hear it, but I told her any way. Because, that kid would cry and cry when ever Mat the brat didn't get his way. And they call that attention deficient disorder. Wow what terminology, is that what parents use instead of just saying, Oh, my kid is just a spoiled little brat? Get over it people, don't spoil your kid, and your kid wont be a brat when he/she doesn't get their way...    

Answer 8

for those who really have adhd     it is not a cop out      but ADHD is very over diagnosed      

Answer 9

They are used as copouts... but they are not copouts themself.

I have a nephew who falls in the category you decribe.  He is now 13, and the son of a single (but engaged) man.  The father takes absolutly no responsibility for his son and lets him run wild.  One example:  At the age of 6 the boy was routinly alowed to put himself to bed, he would often stay up until 3 am on school nights playing video games with no parental supervision.  He still does so.  He obviously has had problems with school, he's been held back once now, and it has been recommened he should be held back 2 more times on top of that.  A "C" is considered a good grade for him.  To this day, he is not required to do homework by his father.  Fortunatly he has never gotten in trouble with the law, but he is the most disrespectful child I have ever met.  He blatently refuses to pay attention to adults or follow directions.  His fathers excuse for his behavior "he has ADD".  Keep in mind this was a self diagnosis, he has never been to a doctor.  His father tells everyone that the reason he has problems is because of his "ADD'.... it is a total cop out and an excuse for a lazy parent and is now

With that being said....I am 30 years old, twice a college graduate, am very successful in my career, and happily married to a beautiful wife.  And I also have ADD.  And I can say without a doubt, that ADD is a difficult condition to live with.  It takes much more work and self control to get things accomplished than other people.  Often in meetings at work I find myself easily getting lost in conversations, I have to make sure I take dilligent notes so I can go back and review after the meetings to fill in gaps when my mind wanders.  At school, in some of the more "boring" classes, I had to use a tape recorder to assist with my studying so I can go back and listen to parts I may have missed.  My wife also has to have a little better patience with me.  Little things like asking me to stop on my way home and pick up milk often get forgotten about.  I however, have never used my ADD as an excuse, where I have failed in the past, I have found ways to make sure it didn't happen again.

Learning disabilites are real, and they are real problems.... but way too often they are exploited and used as an excuse.  Both by the individual and by their parents.

Answer 10

I'm with you all the way.  And I would guess it's more like 95%.

Parents need to do their jobs instead of tryin to get drugs to do it for em.

Nothin is wrong with a good spanking for a kid whose behaviour ain't up to par.  It's worked for 1000s of years.  If it ain't broke, don't fix it.

Answer 11

I agree that many teachers and parents just don't want to deal w/ kids who have a few behavior problems. Many are quick to jump on the ADHD bandwagon.

However, when you are around a genuine ADHD/ADD kid, you'll see that the disorder itself isn't 'made up'.

My boyfriend's son is almost and has ADHD w/ a touch of some bipolar symptoms (I'm not claiming he's bipolar). We tried all kinds of discipline (besides beating the poor kid). We tried reward systems. Military-style discipline (as in 'no toleration' kind of thing). We tried everything we could think of and others suggested. You try putting up with an 8 hour tantrum (no joke) when spanking or putting the kid in the corner only makes things 10 times worse. Watch a kid bang his head on the floor and wall and hit himself just because he's pissed off that he got sent to the corner for a minor offense. The ONLY thing that would keep the boy sane was to get EVERYTHING his way. Life doesn't work like that, for any of us, kid or adult. So trust me, in our case anyway, our parenting was far from 'slack' (well, his bio mom's parenting is nonexistant... she's a piece of c**p and he doesn't see her).

I'm grateful for meds, to say the least. He still gets in trouble. He still back talks and all that that normal boys his age do. He's not pumped full of meds and acting like a zombie, no kid should be put through that. And no kid should go through what he went through. If you were around him enough, you could have seen how confused and angry he was. Truely in a darker place.

I would say about 75% of those kids are just brats. :)

What p*sses me off the most is the parents who take their kids into therapy for ADHD, and go next door to Kroger and think the therapists and meds are going to make it all better. Perhaps the meds will calm their kid down so they don't have to deal with them. However, if a kid truely has ADHD, the meds won't work by themselves. Parents have to take the other half of the role. They have to work with the kid and try different things. These parents are usually the ones who tried like h*ll in the first place and got no where. And their kids... are the ones who truely have ADHD or some other similar disorder.

Answer 12

I think so.  They just need discipline.