Are money dances at a wedding tacky?

Question

I don't know if I want to do a money dance at our wedding. I have been told it is a good thing by some and a bad thing by others. I don't want people thinking that we are greedy or rude. Any suggestions?

Answer 1

Well I did it at my wedding.  Everyone seemed to enjoy it actually plus I made about $400.  But it depends.  You know the people who are going to your wedding.  Do you think they would participate?  Do you think they would enjoy it.  Doesn't matter if us random yahoo answers think it's tacky or not.  You know your guest better than we do.  I must admit it was fun though.  Me and my husband did it together and we made a bet to see who made the most money.  LOL

I won

Answer 2

It is kind of a tradition in our family so yes I did have one and I loved it!  I got to have a lot of one on one time with guests that I wouldn't have had if I didn't do the dance.  It seems to get everyone up out of their seats laughing and having a good time.  If a guest doesn't like it then they don't have to participate in my opinion!  Ok now bring on the thumbs down!  

I also wanted to add that I was married on a paddle boat and you were not allowed to bring gifts aboard.  It is a security issue and we had no control over it.  Everyone also thought it was a great way to give a gift personaly not just writing best wishes on a card.

Answer 3

It depends on the culture. Some Greek families will throw money out whether or not you have an official money dance, and some more North Americans will think you're the tackiest person ever if you try it. Ask your parents/aunts and uncles/etc. They will be able to tell you what is culturally expected at a wedding in your families.  

Answer 4

alot of people think they're rude. i personally have never thought that. i have fun going to a wedding and participating in the dollar dance. but for my own wedding i didn't have it because i know alot of guests would think it was tacky.

Answer 5

It's tradition to some. If you want to do it, do it!  Some also just think it's a way of helping with the honeymoon and so on.  I'm going to do it.  You should too.  It's another way to mingle with guests and have some one on one time.

Answer 6

If both your families do not have strong opinions about having a money dance I would leave it out. Some of your guests might find it "greedy or rude". However if it's a must have tradition in your family then go for it. Family over friends. And if they're really your friends, they won't judge you for having it.

Answer 7

I think it certain cultures and areas it's expected, but personally think anything here the couple is soliciting money at the wedding is tacky.

Answer 8

I dont like them.

Answer 9

I wasn't aware of this, until I attended a Mexican American wedding, where they had it, a dollar each to dance with the bride, for the men, and the groom for the ladies.

I didn't think it was tacky, as it was a culture custom. And to be honest, I enjoyed my short dance with the bride.

A great deal for a dollar.

Let's face it, even with all the wedding presents, they may get, setting up home and everything, it doesn't hurt to have a few bucks in your pockets.

And at a dollar, it's not exactly breaking the bank, is it. That was a few years ago, so perhaps, a five dollar dance, would be more like it, these days. No one is forced to contribute, so for me, I thought it was just fine. And a nice touch.

Answer 10

I don't think they are tacky. They're fun! Weddings should definitely have some fun elements imo. Weddings with dull music and where everyone sits all night are so boring! I say do it and have a blast! Congrats! :)

Answer 11

i think it's tacky. if i was at a wedding and there was one there, i would feel uncomfortable. a wedding is a day of celebration, not a fundraiser.

Answer 12

I'm currently facing this dilemma as well. My mothers side of the family thinks that it's a MUST (they have a spanish background) and my fiance thinks it's way tacky... (his family is basically all german). Either way... I know my grandmother, aunts and uncles from my moms side will be stuffing my dress and my mans tux with money during any dance, since I have concluded not to have a money dance at my wedding.

Answer 13

there are some cultures where it is basically expected.  in those cultures I think its ok becuase it is tradition and guests are expecting it to happen.  for anything else I think its just a tacky way of getting money while trying to use the excuse "but it gives me time to spend with each guest."  sorry but you should be making time for each guest to thank them for coming without expecting something for it.  your already getting a wedding gift, possibly a shower gift if your having one, time out of their day and travel expenses for those who need to travel to be there.  I would feel really weird at a money dance wedding as I would no way in heck participate and wouldnt want to be thinking such bad things of the couple on their wedding day, but really they deserve to be told their are being tacky, greedy people.    

Answer 14

Heck no! I'm looking forward to the dollar dance at my wedding. I think it's just a fun time at the rehearsal where anyone who wants to dance with you can.

Answer 15

Money dances (as with raffles, money trees, etc.) are very tacky to do at weddings. Suggesting the guests spend more money on you when they've already bought a gift, a new outfit, and not to mention the outrageous price of gas to get there, is very tacky and rude. Definitely keep away from this idea.

Answer 16

Yeah, pretty tacky.

Answer 17

It's truly a cultural thing.  

However, in the U.S., it's generally regarded as tacky.  

But, say you are old world Italian and pretty much everyone at the wedding is the same way, then it's a different story.  

This question has been asked a ton of times and the result is always the same: it's all opinion.  Expect lots of thumbs in both directions based solely on opinion.  

Etiquette-wise, it's not acceptable.  It's a huge turn-off for me.  Why?  Because if you can't afford your wedding/honeymoon, then you should cut corners, not beg guests for money.  

Answer 18

If it's accepted within your culture then I think it's acceptable because it is expected (e.g. If you are Greek). If you're not from a cultural background like this then I think it is tacky and rude.

Answer 19

My side of the family does it.  So I don't have a problem w/ it, it's common for us.  We do a $1 dance, each person pays $1 to dance w/ the bride or groom.

Answer 20

Well i like the idea but i dont know about it. It kinda seems tacky.

Answer 21

Yes, it is tacky.  But it can be fun tacky.

We did a money dance - my MIL insisted saying it was tradition.  I didn't want to, I'm a pretty traditional and formal person and it seemed very gauche.

So, my response was to ham it up and use Tina Turner's private dancer and have fun with it. We made it clear by our actions that it was about having fun, not a money grab. I even starting paying people to get up and dance with me.  

We made it funny, so that the fact that it was also tacky was lost.  We netted about $100 and got some great pictures!!

I danced with people that I may not have danced with otherwise and it was actually one of my favorite reception memories (but DON"T tell my MIL).  ;)

Answer 22

Mainstream etiquette, it's bad... but in some cultures and families it is a must.  For us... my family sees it as a HUGE no-no.  My hubby's family sees it as a must.  We did not plan one... and his relatives arranged a "suprise" mone dance.  (We call it a "Dollar Dance")  Since his family is at least 10 times bigger than mine, I guess they win.

Answer 23

better there than at the strip bar with the grooms buddies

Answer 24

I think they're tacky so I didn't have one even though my mom thought I should.  Wedding guests generally bring a gift and I think it's rude to expect them to give you extra money too just to dance with the bride and/or groom.

Answer 25

I was against it. Pretty much everyone else in my family and my fiance's family were for it. So, I agreed to do it.

I'm glad I did, we made around $400 as most people gave us $20s!! Someone even gave us $100! We didn't do it in a gross way and let people stuff money down my dress or whatever. We had a basket that our MOH and BM stood there and held so people could pay them if they wanted to dance with us. It was a fun time, and I enjoyed dancing with people that otherwise I would never have danced with! The best part was seeing my groom dance with my 6'7" 300 pound uncle! 8) It was a hilarious time!

Answer 26

I don't think dollar dances are tacky, because for one it is only a dollar.  Secondly, the guests have a choice in the matter. Thirdly, the guests get something in return (a dance, and some one on one time with the bride or groom, because that is actually difficult to do at a reception!).  I did go to a wedding where the bride was "kidnapped" and the guests had to pay a ransom (they actually went around person by person and asked for a "donation).  I didn't really like that, and I felt awkward.  So, for all those people out there who think the dollar dance is tacky, take a second look at it.  It is a fun tradition, and even if it is a tad tacky, there are a lot worse ideas out there!