Are second thoughts appropraite for a bride to be?

Question

I had been in long distance relationship with my fiance for 3 years and 1/2.Recently, we decided to get married which was our dream from the start. Is it normal to have seconds thoughts to get married or not since we only have 3 months to go before our wedding ceremony? I was ecstatic at first to get the 'planning' done but now i'm not sure..I become less motivated and scared. This is my first wedding and i'm 27..any advice will be of help..tnx.

Answer 1

Yes the is totally normal! You love him and he loves you! what more can you get? And 27 is a great age to get a married at! Best of luck!.....

Answer 2

Failing to worry is actually a bad sign. That's not to say that worries mean everything will be ok, but worrying is a sign that you're taking this seriously. You're committing yourself to something which will last pretty much the rest of your life barring grave misfortune. No matter how old you are that's an intimidating thought.

However I second the motion that you should try and figure out why you're scared. If it's just because you have a big step ahead of you or if it's a bit of nervousness about everthing that's fine. If it's him in particular, or something specific then think about it, and talk it over with someone. (Him, counsellor, friend as appropriate).

If you have already done pre-marital counselling then you have useful skills from that to evaluate if your worries are a warning flag. If you haven't done it yet then perhaps you can try to figure this out when you go for it.

Answer 3

Yes that is normal, just relax and enjoy your special day.

Answer 4

omg no, if you have second thoughts at all it's not meant to be, call it off.

kidding.

yeah, it's normal, happens to everybody. just go with it, you'll be fine.

Answer 5

yes it definetly normal. Just listen to your heart and your gut instinct!

Answer 6

honey if you are having 2nd thoughts i really dont think i would do it!

Answer 7

Second thoughts are perfectly normal! Nerves show that you are deeply contemplating and reflecting upon the commitment you are about to make. Quite frankly, if you weren't a little nervous, I wouldn't think you were taking it very seriously! As long as that little voice isn't telling you that he's wrong for you, bad to you, or won't make you happy, you should be perfectly fine =]

Answer 8

second thoughts are normal.but they are your minds way of telling you to think this thing through, and perhaps not do this thing. don't forget marriage is not something you try. marriage is something you do. until death do us part. if this is not what you are going for then call the whole thing off.

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it would be best if both partners go into it with the same goal.

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Answer 9

Some second thoughts and "jitters" are normal.  But you need to think about what it is that is causing the 2nd thoughts.  Is it just the change to a new home, moving?  Or is it that you are not sure you love him anymore?  Was it "safe" to have a long distance relationship so that you could keep others away by saying I have a boyfriend but still be independent and now that the wedding is approaching you are scared of loosing the independence?  Before you say I do, you need to figure out if these are jitters or serious doubts.  Good luck!

Answer 10

its perfectly normal.  what i would suggest is make a list of good things and a list of bad things about your fiance.  If the bad things are more numerous than the good things then I would consider re-evaluating your relationship.  You are probably just stressed with all the planning and stuff.

Answer 11

second - third and fourth!  its normal to second guess yourself on any major decision in life.  

you know in your heart if its right - good luck and have a wonderful marriage.

Answer 12

of course if your heart is not completely in it you need to say something before its to late and you end up loosing your house in the divorce

Answer 13

i personally do not think it's normal. i was 27 when i got married and i wasn't having second thoughts at all. maybe i'm the one that's not normal though... to me it sounds like a bad sign though