Are there many truly happy stepfamilies?

Question

For people in stepfamily situations, especially parents. Do you have a happy relationship with your stepchild/stepchildren? If so, did it start off happy? If not, did it start out that way? How old were the kids when you joined them? Would you do it over again if you knew then what you know now? I'm curious what most stepfamilies are like and I'm not here to judge anyone, I just want realistic, honest answers. Thank you.

Answer 1

Your Answer:

My husband was brought in as a step-dad and I will offer my take on it from what I saw and what he has told me.

My daughter was 4 when we started dating and 7 when we married. She is 10 now and will be 11 in November.

Their relationship started out buddy buddy friendship. Then as we became more serious, he was having a hard time breaking out of that role into a father figure role. It resulted in me being the middle alot. While in the middle, I had to set better boundries and expand his authority so he would be taken seriously but not be an enemy.

Today, we are a parenting unit. He has a say in everything and is an authority figure as well as a loving parent balance.

I know it was hard for him and he still fears the day when the dark statement of "You are not my real dad" drops (which would just break him up inside because he loves her like his own). I try to relate and say, thats the same fear I have but with her saying to me : I HATE YOU. Kids say stuff to hurt but she would really be tore up without him.

I think what counts is that the bio parent has a handle on their kids and has their respect to then bring in the other person as that parenting figure. You dont have to be blood related to love hard as a family.

Answer 2

I became a stepmom with my stepdaughter at the ages of 5yrs old. She is 15yrs old we been thru h**l and hot water together, now we are not talking to each other, which is so sad. She just don't know how to respect me whatsoever.  

Answer 3

the brady bunch