Are they taking advantage??

Question

My sister and BIL bought a house about a month ago. They have been married for about 1 1/2 years and have just started using their wedding gifts.... pots, pans, dishes, towels, etc.... They used their old stuff before they bought the house. They wanted to save all the new things for the house. Now they want to have a house-warming party which I am not against. I think that it is a fantastic idea......but they want to also have a registry at Wal-Mart and Target so that guest attending the party will buy them a gift from there. They don't need anhything... trust me... I helped unpack and slept a few nights there. They are well furnished. Plus my sister will soon be receiving her docotrs degree and my BIL has a terrific job. Together they will be making well over 6 figures. They will be making more money than anyone attending that party. So, why do they EXPECT people to buy them gifts, when they can afford whatever they want??? They plan on sending out invitations to people with their registries listed on it. Is it rude of them to expect gifts from people??? Should I speak up and tell them that I feel that they are abusing people's kindness???

Answer 1

Having your gift preferences listed with a registry doesn't obligate the guests to buy. They are not abusing, simply providing a guideline if people want to go that way. How they choose to organise themselves is up to them not you.

Answer 2

No. I think that it is none of your business what they do. You may disagree with their actions but its their life, their party, their friends, their gifts and their choice. I say that you totally stay out of their business.

Answer 3

I think you're right. But there are really people like your sister and BIL who love to receive gifts,some prefer expensive gifts. We should not force a person to give us gifts especially if they don't have a budget. We should be thankful even for the small things that we receive.

There's nothing wrong if you will tell them what you think about that. maybe it will help them to realize that they are becoming materialistic. Just say it in a nice way or not direct.

Answer 4

Some guests may feel obligated to use the registry list, but you don't have to (since you know what they need and don't need).  If I knew they got married only a couple years ago and I got this invitation, I'd think it was kind of greedy.  But I would bring them a gift, just not on their registry.

Answer 5

I think expecting a gift from your guests is just down right rude, no matter what your income is. Even more so when you have a list of what people should get you.

If someone brings you a gift, fine. But expecting one is wrong, especially if you make more money than your guests.

I would just be happy with people turning up.

I personally would speak to them about it and tell them they are being rude, but if you feel it will affect your relationship with them, which it may, then just eave it.

And also, if you do get them a gift, get them what you want to get them, not what's on their list.

Answer 6

You don't have to bring a gift.  Bring a dish instead.  If they are using a registry, I am sure they aren't listing things they already have.  I am sure all of the guests know it isn't mandatory to buy something. A registry just makes it easier in case someone does want to bring a gift.