Are we irresponsible for trying to conceive after being married for less than one year?

Question

My husband and I will celebrate our first wedding anniversary in September. We are actively trying to conceive, and our 'goal,' is to be pregnant by Halloween. One set of parents (and some friends) think we're rushing into having a child, but we're not. Aside from knowing we'll be loving and devoted parents, there are some other reasons.

We make about $90,000 combined per year, we own our own home. I have been diagnosed with endometriosis and polycystic ovary syndrome -- endometriosis about 5 or 6 years ago, and the PCOS within the last 6 months. When I am on my period, I am in constant pain. Even when I'm not on my period, I have what could be considered 'cramping,' and pelvic pain. Within a few months of having a child (or more than one, if we are able), I will probably have a hysterectomy so that I don't have to worry about PCOS or endometriosis.

In your opinions, are we being foolish by trying to conceive now? Is our reasoning wrong or irrational? We are 26 and 24.

Answer 1

are you kidding!!! Ive only been married for 3 months and I want a baby....

Just becareful... Babies are blessings!!

baby dust....

Answer 2

I got pregnant 2 months after meeting my husband....we got to 22 weeks and had to have a surgical abortion(fetal defects) we then got married a month later and next month will be our 1 year anniv. we are more in love with eachother than anyone i know and we have my daughter(5 yr old) from my prev relationship. I am 23 he is 26. We have been ttc for 10 mos. You know when YOU are ready and DONT let anyone tell you any different. :) Good luck hun and i hope you both get your baby :)

Answer 3

no you are not. I'm wanting a baby with my husband and we are in worse shape than you. Together we bring in about $30,000 a year. We are paying on our house. I'm on disability, my husband works.we are trying to conceive.

Answer 4

if you feel that you and your husband are ready for children then go for it. if anyone family or friends feels the need to give you there opinion on the subject dont feel you need to go into your medical issues it is none of there busisness. just politely tell them that you and your husband have made this decision and if they can not support you then kindly butt out.

Answer 5

I got pregnant one month after being married.  While it might have been nice to be married and just the two of us for a while, I would not change ANYTHING---my daughter is the best thing that has happened to us.

With your troubles, you are right to begin TTC right away.  It might take you a bit longer than "normal" ppl.  So, baby dance all you want, sister!

Good luck---baby dust!

Answer 6

Absolutely NOT!

Only you and your husband know when it is right.

You and your dh have decided to bring a baby into this world out of love and I think it is such a beautiful thing!

Don't let anybody ever tell you that you are rushing it.. It is not their life to dictate.. and really it is none of their business.

Best of luck to you.

Answer 7

You are absolutely NOT being foolish!!  while being married is definately a plus when having kids, it doesn't mean that non married couples cant have kids and be great parents.

In my opinion you are well on your way to making a great life and family for your unborn children.  good luck to you!!

Answer 8

Wow I'd love to make that money lol I feel poor now haha

Anyway, you're married hun, go for it! I wish you the best! :)

Answer 9

hun dont let no one tell you how to live your life you are marrried have a house now you want to expand your family its not like you are dating liveing with your parents and trying tell people it all part of life...

Answer 10

I don't think so. My hubby and I have been married since April and have been actively trying since then. We have been together for 7 yrs and lived together for 6 1/2 of those years so we feel there is no need to wait. There really never is a perfect time. We own our home, much like you and are 25 and 27. So if I thought you were irresponsible I would have to say the same about myself and I don't think I am! LOL...Good luck to you! I really hope you get your BFP soon :-)  BTW, don't worry about what your family thinks. Only you know when you are ready, nobody else. We haven't even told anyone we are trying so we don't have to hear everyone's opinions or deal with the constant "Are you pregnant yet?" questions!

Answer 11

No your not being foolish .. you love eachother and thats all you need to know =]

I'm not even married yet ( planning it ) and were still trying for a baby. Good luck x

Answer 12

I don't believe you are being irresponsible.  Considering your health issues I feel it is a wise decision.  I know that having PCOS can make conceiving children very difficult and who knows how long it might take you to even get pregnant if you start now.  I do feel, however, that giving yourself a deadline could cause you and your spouse unneeded stress I would drop the we want to get pregnant before October thing.  Getting pregnant isn't as easy as we think it should be.  Do what you feel is right and ignore unwanted advice or comments.

Answer 13

You're adults and you're married. Do whatever you think is right for you. I personally think you are making the right choice- if you wait too long, you might not be able to have kids at all.

Answer 14

I think that people need to mind their own business unless you are giving them a reason to think that you guys aren't going to stay together.  (Do you fight alot in front of them?)  My husband and I used to only argue when we were around his dad (and 6 step siblings).  The crowd made me stressed and upset, but his family just thought we were disfunctional.  

I would talk to them and make it clear that you are responsible adults and you intend on living your life the way you please.  And then ignore them if they bring it up again.  I seriously think that they are being rude.

Good luck on TTC.  Don't get upset if it takes longer than October.  I hear things happen when they are suposed to.

:)

Answer 15

If you feel ready then go for it! There will always be someone who will disapprove of choices you make, whether its having a child, buying a house, or wearing white after Labor Day!!

Answer 16

i got pregnant on our honeymoon 4 weeks ago and everybody things its the sweetest and most joyful thing!!! admittedly i am in shock but am happy and it really has brought new meaning and joy to our new marriage as we expect our baby!! Thankfully we are financially secure and have a loving home but babies are always good news! what are you waiting for!! go for it - its a wonderful occurance!

Answer 17

It's your choice to have a baby, and your not rushing into it if you feel your ready. Don't let anyone else try to make that choice for you.

Answer 18

No way! My husband and I got pregnant in February.. We were married just 2 months prior in December.

Not only are you not irresponsible, but it is also smart of you to start trying now with your condition.

Good luck!