As far as kids go why do we do this?

Question

why when my daughter wants to play race car and gijoe with my son its ok and they play and have fun and i dont have a problem but then on the other hand when she cons him into playing dress up and tea party i am suposted to stop him so he dosnt have gender issues, so why is ok for her to play army and with the trucks in the sand box but if he puts a dress on for dress up or gets into my makeup hes got gender issues. ( i cant keep my kids apart they do everything together. so its not like hes running around in a dress by him self)

Answer 1

I think it is normal for small children to play with "gender specific toys" Have you ever seen that show John and Kate plus 8, the boys on that show dress up with the girls. I think that adults make too much out of it. Children don't even have a sense that this is not right until they are older. I think that your son will be fine, but don't make an issue out of him playing with his sister.

Answer 2

You shouldn't worry about it.  Gender issues are not caused by children playing.

Little boys should play with dolls so they can learn nuturing skills.  Lots of men use makeup--like movie stars, news reporters, theater actors, etc.  Dressing up is fun for little kids and is not a sexual activity.  It's creative.

Answer 3

It's not going to give him gender issues to play with "girl" toys....daughter dresses up the cat in baby clothes the cat isnt having identity issues.

use to play with my brothers like that, they have grown up to be strong straight good men...better then most of the idiots here.

Answer 4

Because men and boys need liberating too! I firmly believe this. because of women's lib, if you wanna be grily that's fine, if you wanna be a tomboy that's fine. The message is you can be who you want to be and you are still a woman. But men and boys still sucumb to socities beliefs of 'being a man'. Like if a guy walks into his local pub wearing pin kand says he doesn't like football or want sto become a nanny his friends will mock him.

Answer 5

Good point.  I think you are absolutely right, and of course this doesn't mean he has gender issues.  To anyone who claims otherwise, tell them what you just said to us: they do everything together, and she does boy things with him, so why can't he do girl things with her?  They're kids playing.  Neither of them are concerned with "gender identities," they're just people.

Answer 6

This is something YOU are doing, so only you can know the reason behind it.

When my brother and I were younger, he would sometimes play with dolls with me, and I would play with cars with him. Our parents never objected, and neither of us have any gender issues.

Answer 7

My son even wears dresses when he plays with his sister. He is 2 and the 13 year odl has been known to put makeup on him. All 3 of mine play with trucks and with dolls. None of this will cause "issues".

**ETA**Jimmy? That only explains boys not playing with dolls. It does not explain why it's OK for a girl to play with trucks. And HELLO...the woman and children don;t answer to God of on their own? You are a bit confused and it sounds a bit self-important in your "manhood".

Answer 8

I think your daughters needs some of her own friends.  She's gonna think we all dress up like that.

Answer 9

I started out this response trying to be as nice as I could, without ruffling anyone feathers or speaking out of the norm but it's just too long and complicated. So let me just lay it on the line.

In all good relationships there is a vertical alignment that has been proven successful in years past.

God

Family

Country

Business

And in the family category we see the vertical alignment break down into

Father

Mother

Kids

Kids answer to the Mother, and the Mother answers to the Father, and the Father answers to God.

This builds the template that men are masculine, women are effeminate. And that's the way that it was, until the feminist movement (or as I like to call it the masculine movement for women). This set the precedent that it was OK for girls to play with GI Joe's and trucks and such. This was ran and controlled by women and though met with resistance at first, was accepted by women. Men didn't have any part in it and didn't care to (for the most part). But that doesn't mean they agree, they are not going to let the male gender be changed (that is until recently).

So this is why people see it as OK to let girls play with trucks but not boys play with barbies.