As much as people say they love their adoptees as?

Question

"one of their own", do YOU adoptees really feel like "one of their own" in your afamily?

Answer 1

I do and have always felt that way.  Of course I was the one who asked if I was adopted at 5...my mom's answer was well yes you were.  lol.  Pretty easy transition.   Anyways..yes but I also had a very loving family of which NEVER made an issue of the adoption.

Answer 2

I claim my place in my adoptive family they always treated me the same as my non adopted brothers and was always accepted and loved by all family members as one of their own.

None of this stopped the feeling that I didn't quite fit in; I always felt like a piece of a jigsaw puzzle that had been put away  in the wrong box.   Sometimes love just doesn't do it.

Think of the story of the 'Ugly Duckling' - that's how I felt.   Non-realative Adoption is like asking a German Shepherd Dog to raise a Dashchund and pretend like they are cut from the same cloth

My adoptive family and I are quite close and loving and they consider me one of their own.  Although I don't feel like one of them.

Answer 3

No. But I wanted to be.

Answer 4

Hmmm, this is a little difficult to answer simply because my amom never made me feel that she felt differently about me than she did my abrother, who is biologically hers.  But, he just naturally 'fit' a lot better than I did as far as looks, personality, likes, dislikes, etc. that it was uncomfortable at times as a little girl.  I often felt like the 'odd man out' but was too young to make sense of it.

Answer 5

Considering my parents didn't have any bio children I think they felt that we were 'one of their own' as they had nothing to compare it to.   Having two other adopted brothers I think we bonded with each other but can't say that I ever felt that completely natural "i'm at home" feeling...

Don't mistake that for me saying that I don't feel like they were my family or that we didn't have our good times but I honestly feel that we lack something that should be so 'natural' & comfortable with something that is 'love' but fake & 'forced'.

Nothing makes it more awkwardly obvious when I'm at a family reunion and I'm the only minority of the bunch (along with my brothers)...when we younger it didn't really bother me but as we got older there are some that still support you while others really carry themselves as better.  Sorry, if you get to know me, 'family' or not I will not be disrespected or treated as a second class citizen just because I'm not 'blood-related'...if anything it only makes me look upon their ignorance & I will myself will in turn treat them like they're not worth my time.

I will state for the record my parents (for the most part) are good people.  I don't know why but I actually feel bad that my dad couldn't have his own kids...he's the only son out of his siblings so therefore the family name/blood line is now stopped with my dad.  True my brothers can carry on the last name but not blood line.  It makes me wonder if his parents are saddened by that...they've never treated us differently butyou can't help think those thoughts.

Answer 6

I do feel like a *real* member of my family - and I say that without reservation. My best friend in high school, who was raised by her biological family, was always jealous of how well my family fit together, while she always felt estranged from her family.

Answer 7

My adad is the person who has come the closest to offering me truly unconditional love.  For him, I really do think that adoption was a non-issue.  I always felt that he and I belonged to each other.  Not so sure about amom.

Answer 8

The only time I ever thought about it was at the doctor's office - "Any known history of blah blah blah?"  I have no doubt that I was my parents' kid regardless of how they got me.  And I now have a two-year-old son whom I adopted, and I can't imagine loving him any more if I'd given birth to him.

Answer 9

Yes. I never felt like i didn't belong or fit in with my family.

Answer 10

Absolutly, Positivly YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

My Aparents could not have their own children, and even if they could I think I would have been treated no different. I KNOW that I was raised and loved as if I were one of their own, because in their eyes I was their own.

Answer 11

i did and sttill do. i love my adopted parents and am thankful i was taken in by such wonderful people. maybe if they adopted me a different brother than the one they did might have been nice. lol!!!

Answer 12

Yes, but i'm an only child so I don't have a bio-sibling in my family. But i can honestly say my a-parents do indeed love me.

Answer 13

My son is my own, I knew the minute I met him, when he was still in his birth mother's tummy.  I felt it in my heart.  

What I fine annoying is when the "public" will say, oh their son is adopted or the adopted son of...Media, family, friends needs to drop that line.  Once a child is adopted they are part of the family so it should no longer be, the adopted son or adopted daughter, it should simply be the son or daughter of..

Does that make sense?

Answer 14

I do--sort of.  I don't look or act or smell like them, but they have always been accepting and loving.  The plain fact is, I don't know what it would really be like or feel like to actually belong in a family.

My a'parents didn't/couldn't have their own children.  I don't know how I would have fared if there were "real" kids in my immediate family.

Answer 15

Never did, never will.

That's the BEST part of my adoption.  My sentence is over.

Answer 16

Yes I believe they loved me as "one of their own". Of course at times I had my doubts when I was little. But I've come to realize they have done nothing, but try to love and help me grow. And that is what parents are suppose to do. I admit it harder for adopted parents and adoptees. They have this barrier that has to be broken before you feel like a family. But after that everything just falls into place.