At this point I don't care?

Question

So lately my friends have been kinda putting some peer pressure on me to find a guy.Currently all my friends are in relationships,and actually have for months.Im the only one in the whole group of friends who doesn't go to the group dates or anything like that involving couples,and my friends tell me they'd love for me to join but they want me to find a guy.I've never had a boyfriend,and I'd love one sure but 1.im still sorta young(14 years old) and 2.I don't find myself "dating material".I don't know at this point it's getting on my nerve,I've told them I don't care really(though i've lied once or twice)

but all Im trying to figure out why are my friends trying to get me on dates and try and get a boyfriend with just anyone I can somewhat connect with?

Im not gonna lie,like everyother 14 year old girl i'd love a boyfriend,but it's not my time obviously and im waiting around for the right guy.I don't want to go into a relationship with some guy I meet.I want the right guy at the right time.

but why are my friends getting so pushy with trying to find me someone?

and don't call them bad friends or something,there great friends,just not when it comes to trying to get me in a relationship.Otherwise there the greatest friends I could ever ask for so like I said,don't say there being bad friends.

Answer 1

either they want u with a guy so u can b like them or secretly they envy u. i

Answer 2

I think that's the way a lot of friends would be.

And I think you sound very smart for waiting for the right time.

You are doing the right thing.

Answer 3

THIER NOT BAD FRIENDS ..THERE JUST MORE HARD-UP THEN U R AND U HAVE MORE CLASS TOO

Answer 4

Don't do it if you don't want to.

Find a boy eventually that naturally clicks, not in a forced, stupid way.

I made the same mistake in 9th grade and I regret it deeply.

Your time will come.

And tell your friends; if theyre your friends then they shall understand.

Answer 5

Maybe they think youll be happyer if you have one thats like my friends...lol...~xoxo ally*

Answer 6

youve got plenty of time for relationships trust me they arent all theyve cracked up to be anyways

Answer 7

maybe they might think youd feel more apart of the group if you had a bf.

or maybe they want you to be more involved with them when they go out , thats why they want to find you a dude.

Answer 8

alrite. if u dont want a boyfriend. hun U DONT NEED ONE. u dont have to make URSELF feel uncomfortable for ur friends to have a good time. they just want u to be included with them nd have fun. they probably just want u with them so maybe u dont feel like ur not with them. nd maybe its just that they loveee having boyfriends they just want u to join in. but if its going to make u feel uncomfortable, dont bother doing it. if they get pushy say sumthing. dont just be like aww i dont care. just be like hey u no wat, i dont want to. talk serius. or theyr just gona keep pushing until sumthing blows. dont b a ***** about it just b serius nd straight forward...u get me? --- nd who says ur not 'dating matireal' ur are young nd u havnt been in the dating scene yet so u are going to feel like that but just wait until ur older. ull feel better. nd wen the time comes it comes.

Answer 9

i think they might think that they are leaving you out =(...and they want to make u part of the group ya think?

but if you really dont want a bf tell them that they are putting pressure on you and you dont like it. You are happy not having a bf and want to be that way for a while...or if u do want a bf you could say..i do want a bf and i appreciate ur guys' attempts to try to get me one but i really  would like to find one on my own...ya know?

The way you  talk about your friends, it sounds like they are really important to you, and i wouldn't call them bad friends but i think that if they are putting pressure on you them that isn't fairt and they should stop =/.

keep waiting for that right guy...im waiting for my guy...and ive found that u shouldnt chase after every guy you see who has a cute face and nice lips....you want the prize and you should save all u got for him. im proud of you for wanting to have the right one instead of being immature and going after every guy that ur friends offer up =)

tell them ur waiting 4 the right 1...and when thhey go out to date...maybe go rent a movie, take a hot bath, lay in bed with a relaxing face mask on and watch the movie with a bowl of ice cream with a side of chocolate and a heaping container of popcorn!!!! heyt that sounds more fun than a date any day ha ha thats what id o so i dont end up feeling lonely =) good luck hun

Answer 10

Why do they think you need a boyfriend?  Why do THEY have to have one for that matter?  Who has been drilling it into your friends head that you have to have a boyfriend to have any self worth because that is what it boils down to.  

A dear friend of mine has 2 kids by 2 different men because she thinks she has to have a man to have any worth.  BULL!!!  Darling you don't ever NEED to date....wait till you find a guy that you like and you WANT to date.  And then take it slow....don't let any guy talk you into bed until you get to college at least and then make sure it is a doc or a lawyer.  All guys want until their mid 20 is in your pants.  Once we males get out into the world and have spread ourselvs around a little THEN we want to settle down with a good woman.

Answer 11

if you feel that your friends are great, then that's good. and it's also good that you're waiting around, and not pressuring yourself into actually finding one. you're right, at your age it is quite early. especially when you have high school coming along the way. but just cause your friends have boyfriends doesn't mean you have to! just tell them straight up, "thanks for being great friends, but really i don't think it's my time yet."

Answer 12

you are sooooo young. seriously, you're right. you have plenty of time.

Answer 13

Get pregnant. come on everyone else is doing it. lol  

Answer 14

your a smart kid.  but dont be so hard on yourself. as for your friends. Just tell them flat out, "hey its kinda annoying when you all push me to find a relationship.. when im ready and the right guy comes along.. then well see how things go. until then just chill"

good luck. and keep the good attitude.

Answer 15

Because without it, the human race will cease to exist.

Answer 16

while you are probably feeling some pressure from your friends, i'm sure they're just trying to help. they probably don't want you to feel left out and think the best solution is to find you a guy so you can join along in all the couple things they do. but you're right...you shouldn't just go out with the first guy you meet who likes you just so you have a boyfriend. the right guy will come along and when he does you'll be so glad you didn't waste a bunch of time on guys you weren't really interested in.  you are still really young, so don't feel like there's something wrong with you or anything because you don't have a boyfriend. you sound like a very smart and mature girl and you're doing the right thing by not forcing yourself to do what everybody else is doing or wants you to do.

i'd say either just try to ignore what your friends are saying or if you think you can, maybe try sitting down with them and just explain that you haven't found a guy yet who you think is worth going out with and you're ok with that.  and that you appreciate that they want what they think is best for you, but their pushing you into getting a boyfriend is not helping.  

Answer 17

This is very normal.  Teens can be very cruel even when they have the noblest of intentions.  Just tell your friends the you simply aren't ready yet.  If they can't handle that, it's their problem.  If they can then you'll have their respect.

Good luck

Answer 18

Have you told them what you told us?  I think if they would understand if you did.  No one should be pressured into having a boyfriend. A relationship with another person is a personal choice and not a afd or status symbol.  Just tell them what you put here and thank them for the concern but, when you feel the need or meet the right guy, than you will be with the couples.

Answer 19

This attitude usually comes with adults - with couples, it becomes easier to go out with other couples as opposed to dragging along other singles.. but you are still so young!  you've got the right mind-set, that you are a little young for dating, and if the opportunity should come about, it should be someone you ACTUALLY have in interest in.. don't forget, the guy's gonna be pretty insulted to figure out you're only dating him to fit in with your friends.. tell your friends to relax - you're not going out to fancy dinners and clubs, you're going to chill! everyone should be welcome, single or not.

Bottom line, if you don't feel awkward with a bunch of couples, and they are all your friends, there is nothing wrong.

Answer 20

You are a wise girl.  Don't give in to peer pressure.  When you meet the right guy you will know.  So many girls think that they have to have a guy to prove they are grown up and mature.  This is foolish and immature.  They have this image of dating that is not to be with someone they want to be around but to say you have a boyfriend (like they are some form of a trophy).  I never gave into this and kudos to you for being your own person.  Guys will be lining up someday for a real person that knows what they want in life and not some imitation clone of their friends.

Answer 21

Don't worry about finding a boyfriend. You will someday, but for now you are still too young. I say why start the whole falling in love and then getting your heart broken cycle now. You see them now happy with someone, but one day you will see you friends cry when they get their hearts broken too. So don't worry when you older the right person will come along. Don't let anyone pressure you into something you don't want to do. As far as dating material well I think that someday you will make a boy very happy.

Answer 22

:| oh ohkay...