At what age do you stop "partying" ?

Question

My husband has two girlfriends they are in there thirties, one is married and the other well she just cant land a husband.so they decide to party with my husband.

I understand they are good friends since before he met me. but its time for them to let him go.he is married now. I'm 21 years old and only been married a month.

any advice.

Answer 1

two thousand zero zero party over oops outta time...

I was 28 in 2000.

Answer 2

You got married way too young.  For one, a real man would not leave his wife to go and party with two other females.  You two are way too immature and you will realize this in 5 years or so.

Answer 3

In my opinion , Having a get together isn't bad . The main key is that you have a good understanding and communication with your husband (about these outings w/ his friends). See , it be different if they were to include you ( ask to be included) you might have fun. But , in all honesty  he should make a decision to say no if your not ok with it. If you and your husband have good communication , talk about it .You have to make sure your on the same level. Having friends isn't bad , but when you have pushy ones like these that they must include the married one is kinda annoying. You need to stand your ground and set boundaries , besides he is no longer single.

Good luck.

Answer 4

You didn't discuss this before you got married?  You and he didn't come to an agreement about what is proper behavior for a married man and what isn't?  Okay ... so why didn't you discuss this?  You knew about these women and that they party.

If they're going out, you go with them.  DON'T DRINK, do you understand that?  You have to remain in control, so lay off the booze.  But don't let him go without you.  Period.

And have The Talk.  If he doesn't understand that his behavior is a really bad idea, then the two of you need to get into marriage counseling, because you didn't marry a man - you married a little boy who wants to have his own way and it won't last if he doesn't become a man and a husband.

Answer 5

Ah!! There's always time for "Partying"....  lol  why don't you join them...pmsl

Answer 6

There's no certain age but if you feel disrespected then you should talk to him.  Do you go out with them too or are you just left at home by yourself?  My best friend is a guy who is 39 and still wants me to go out to bars & shoot pool with him.  I don't.  We can still be friends but now that I'm married he has to come over here so that my husband & I can both spend time with him.  Maybe you could suggest that he tone it down a little.  The girls can come by for a BBQ & a couple of beers but they don't have to be out with him alone all the time.  Compromise.

Answer 7

They say they're both older than me, but I can never keep up with them. They always win the drinking competitions, and they keep dancing even when I'm out of breath and begging them to stop!

The older married one should really be a little more responsible than she is, she's the worst.

Answer 8

maybe he prefers to be with older women,

i'm 21 and i would never get married at that age,

maybe he's more than friends with those

ladies, maybe they don't laugh at his manhood.

Answer 9

Why are you even letting him party with other women ... you're married .... tell him the party's over for those two ladies ... the fact that they hang out with your husband shows a lot of disrespect for you on their part ....

     tell him to clean up his act , get rid of the babes and act like a husband ... or soon he'll be acting like a divorced man .

Answer 10

I want to know how the married one gets to go out so much?  Does her husband come with?  Does her husband know your husband?  Join them from time to time and see what's going on.  Offer to be the designated driver so no one gets a DUI.  I am guessing you don't feel you have anything in common with them, so go out and give it a try.  If your husband does not understand why you are upset, plan outings with your friends.  

Sorry you got married so young.  I made the same mistake and am still paying for it.  Only I want to go out and party some now that my kids are more grown up and I have the chance to get out.  But now he won't go out.

Good luck.

Answer 11

He is probably doing more then "partying" with these girls.

They are probably having 3-somes.

Why the h**l are putting up with this sh*t.

Tell him its time to grow and act like a married man.

Answer 12

Apparently the single gal only knows this way to meet men. And her girl friend is just going along for the ride.

And maybe your husband goes just to make sure his friends don't get in a situation (attacked, drugged, raped).

Some people are lifer partiers.

Others grow old of it.

It's all about preferences.

Answer 13

I'm 39 and the partying continues unabated!!!  Well take it from me, people in their 30's are a treacherous and wily bunch!  We are very cunning and smart!  I would not expect your husband's 30-somethings to just give up and walk away.  You may need to buy them off with some Chippendale gift certificates!  ;)

Answer 14

You never stop. You just need to join in with them!

Answer 15

very Imature situation 21 is very young to be married ur about to see real life for what it is.

Answer 16

Only when the lights go out.... permanently

if you can't beat them... join them!!!

Hey Pat, people over 40 KNOW how to party... we've had years of practice   ;)

Answer 17

When you have children is when you should definitely stop partying.

Some adults never grow up.  

Answer 18

The real issue, as I see it from my chair, is that he's partying with other women & you are excluded.  That is not cool. I don't think he should be partying with other women either.  That's a recipe for disaster. What I suggest is that you tell him nicely how you feel about what he's doing & to ask not to be excluded from these friendships either.  He needs to be made aware of the effect his actions are having on you & he won't be aware if you don't tell him.  If you tell him he can't be friends with these women, it could well backfire on you, and make the situation worse.  Again, make him aware of how his actions are affecting you & tell him what you would like him to do about it.  He may not agree but you have to be honest or this will fester & become a really big fight.  I suggest, speaking your truth, expecting him to get defensive BUT most importantly DONT hammer your point & DO give him time to digest it.  The more a man sees that your not going to throw the kitchen sink at him or give him ultimatums, the more he will take your interests & concerns into consideration.  However, conflict is tricky & you gotta give him time to stew & reflect.  

So to recap, say you peace, let him say his peace then  walk away from the argument & let him mull it over. Good luck sorting this out!  

Answer 19

I'm pouring Coronas down my throat with Mickey as we speak!

mmmmm- thanks Mick!