At what age should you let kids go in for a physical alone?

Question

I have 4 boys. My oldest two are twins and are turning 14 Oct. 1st. They have their yearly physical coming up soon (they need it for school sports) and I am wonering if I should have them go in alone at this point? I have always gone in with them in the past and they never seemed to care. In fact last year they were glad I came in because there was a questionare they had to fill out and they weren't sure about a couple of the questions. I am thinking now that they are in puberty and have many changes going on then I should have them go in alone. I asked them what they think and one said he would like to go in alone and the other said he doesn't really care.

If I let them go in alone do I still get a chance to speak to the doctor after to see how it went? Maybe I could let the doctor know they want to go in alone but to please call me in at the end so I can hear how everything went.

At what age did or will you send your kids in alone for their physical?

Answer 1

If they're old enough to say that they'd like to go in alone, you should probably let them go in alone. They might want to ask the doctor questions about their bodies that they would be embarrassed to ask with you in the room.

I'm not sure about the legalities of doctor-patient confidentiality when the patient is a minor. I could be wrong, but the doctor might not be allowed to divulge anything they specifically discuss. Maybe, instead of asking the doctor how it went, ask your sons. I know that with teens it can be like talking to a clam, but if you tell them why you want to know (just to be assured of their good health), I think they'll grudgingly let you know what's what--not in microscopic detail, but a general picture of health.

Answer 2

well i would go in then when the dr came in to do the exam i would first ask the dr if it would be alright if you left or stayed depending on the choice you child makes then ask your son if he wanted you in  or out. h**l i know when i got my first pap smear done when i was 13 i didnt want my mom in the office with me.  

Answer 3

I would call the doctors office and say my children who are starting highschool are going to be having their physicals and I think they are old enough to go in by themselves, but I would like a word with the doctor afterwards, could you please arrange that? I'm sure the doctor will tell you everything afterwards, unless its personal/private.

Answer 4

My kids are 15, 10, and 6.  At my 15 year olds last appointment (she was 14 at the time) the doctor asked HER is she wanted me in the room with her or not.  He explained that a nurse would accompany him if she wanted me out of the room so that they could talk.  I thought it was great to give her the choice.  She opted to have me  there, but still, I was glad she had a choice.  He has never asked my other kids.  I usually take my oldest and youngest together, then the middle one alone (she is 10 so she doesn't want her 6yr old brother in the room with her).  

Answer 5

You should ask the doctor if it is okay with him.  Most doctors won't let minors in the office alone for fear of rumors and law suits and the like.  If he says it's okay, then ask him to call you in to say how it went.

Answer 6

Legally, my doctors office as a kid said my father had to come back with me until I was 18. He stopped coming in with me around age 14-15 though,  the nurses said that the doctor will just call him back afterward to speak with him. The big question is to ask your kids and ask your doctor. Ask your doctor first. If they don't care, then ask your kids. If your kids do not care, then just back with them.

We, (my four brothers and I) often had appointments scheduled at the same time. We were just sent into different rooms at the same time after a certain age. I think around 12 is when the boys started to get split up.  

Answer 7

I'm 19, firstly; but I can inform you my education may be of good aid.

I live in the United Kingdom, so my opinion and logic may vary.

Children tend to become slightly reliable at 14, although they don't show it; I personally think they would be ok without a guardian or parent monitoring them.

Remember, if a child is continuiously watched, they will rely on you for everything, and it shall hold them back from many other things.

Be sure to lay out rules for children this age, for example; don't go anywhere else, etc. and be back by this time set, etc.

I recommend though, letting them go by themselves, but getting a friends mum to go, if possible.

They are in a safe place, so in this instance; I wouldn't worry,

Answer 8

Ask them their preference.  If they are ok with you still being present then I think it's ok for you to stick around.  Or you could just step out for the actual physical and stand right outside the door.  It's up to you and how comfortable the boys are with you being there.  My mom went with all of us kids to our physicals (there's me, my sister and younger brother) and all of us were ok with her being there.  She was even there for my first gynecologist appointment before I got married.  

Some doctor's offices do have regulations about minors being unaccompanied so check in to that as well.  I'll probably be with both my kids until they voice being uncomfortable with it.

Answer 9

my mom always went in with me til I was 18. And my first few girlie dr. appts she came in with me too. My dad always went in with my brother (hes 17).

I think you should talk to them about it. Maybe go in with them and sit there til the Dr. comes in then step outside.  

Answer 10

When your kids ask to...but at 14 I'd cut the apron strings and send them in alone and only go in if needed by the doctor. Most doctors will call you in once the exam is done anyway.  

Answer 11

You could ask your boys if they have a preference.  If they don't care, then continue to go in with them.  If they request privacy, then let them go in alone and then consult with the doctor immediately afterward.  The doctor knows you want to speak with him, so don't worry about being left in the dark about anything.