Atheists, did you know that Satan is offering you a free access to h**l ?

Question

Atheists, did you know that Satan is offering you a free access to h**l ?

Answer 1

Free entrance wooohooo !

Christians are afraid of h**l, not atheists.

Answer 2

what a min. Your telling me you can talk to satan?

Answer 3

Really? I haven't received a free pass in the mail.

Perhaps you can enlighten us as to the reason, since you seem to know so much about our personal destination.

Answer 4

How can an atheist go to h**l?  They don't believe in God and, logically by default, then they don't believe in Satan.

Edit:

Wow- the responses here are great- Vernon Dozier: Redux 's had me in stitches.

Answer 5

No.  There is no heaven, h**l, satan or god.    

Answer 6

I am big time surprised you spelled atheist correctly.

Miracles really do happen, huh?

~

Answer 7

thanks for the info. [:

btw idiot .. being an atheist mean you don't believe in god or satan.. or heaven or h**l.. so how are they supposed to go to h**l.

haha you make me laugh.

Answer 8

He's the one that hasn't killed anyone or any of his relatives when he's angry with mankind isn't he?

Answer 9

NO?, BUT Maybe if you hum a few bars!!!

No such person, and no such place!!

Get a grip, sweetheart!!

I am JUST not interested!!, And never will be!!

Besides, I have been there, and I have no intention of ever >going> back.

Answer 10

Hey, I hear that god is omnipresent, so I guess I'll see him there.

Answer 11

No.  Satan is a make-believe character that humans created so they would have something to blame all of their hate, suffering, and evil on.  

In reality, we are Satan.  So I suppose you've created a place for yourself to go to if you somehow aren't able to overcome the evil inside yourself.

Stop being so scared your entire life and LIVE!

Answer 12

Thats nice of him to take me in, guess he is not as picky as God. Lucifer doesnt sound all that bad to me.. its God who scares me.  

Answer 13

Since we don't believe in h**l or satan then what's the point of thinking that way?  Plus, in the bible, satan didn't kill even one percent of the people that megalomaniac god slaughtered.  

Answer 14

Really? I am sooo happy. Did you know that Jesus is giving YOU a free pass to NOWHERE? And it includes a trip to Willy Wonkas Chocolate Factory where you will meet Santa, The Easter Bunny AND The Tooth Fairy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Isn't that sweet? However, in order for you to do this, you must 1. Love they neighbor. 2. Not be a glutton and 3. Not have s*x with one you are not married to. Can you meet those requirements? No...well, neither can any other Christian. So, you have a free access pass to h**l too!!! See ya there!

Answer 15

Awesome, no entrance fee!

Answer 16

h**l frightens Christians, not atheists.

Answer 17

Why h**l, and not, say, Jahannam?

Answer 18

I have a condo picked out.  Right on the stix too!  Hurray river front property!

Answer 19

I heard it was a place of weeping and gnashing of teeth. (Matthew 8:12)

Uhh... no thanks. I would rather live in paradise with my Lord.  

Answer 20

yes

Answer 21

He can mark down the prices all he likes, if there's no maid service then I'm not going.

Answer 22

did you know that satan and h**l don't exist and to enlightened minds this is an empty threat?.. and!! the worst possible kind of argument for the existence of whichever god that it is that you believe in.

Answer 23

Awesome.

x

Answer 24

I would sure like to know the faith of the person who asked this question. And if it should happen to be a Christian, shame on you. I am a Christian and I would never ask or tell this to anyone. Learn to love and tolerate your fellow man and enemies! That's what a Christian is.

Answer 25

When you say "Satan" you mean "Comcast", right?

Answer 26

completely free? wat a nice guy. See, no god ever offered me anything nice like that.  

Answer 27

Free wireless access too?

Answer 28

Who do you think you are to tell people that they are going to h**l?  If you are trying to evangelize, it isn't going to work, because Atheists do not believe in h**l in the first place.  But as a Christian, don't you think that you can show some compassion?  I'll pray for you

Answer 29

I already made my reservations.

Answer 30

Did you know you're throwing your life away and wasting time worshiping something that doesn't exist?

Answer 31

Uh... so he's the publicist for some obscure band?  Is it a good band?  Okay, I'm for that.

Oh, no, I know, he's the new PR guy for h**l, Michigan.  I've got relatives there, nice town, kinda cold in the winter.

Wait, wait, maybe he's the owner of a new bar....

Nope, sorry, don't get it.