BJJ - ok for married man to roll w/ female(s)?

Question

yes - it's just a sport, not sexual , so who cares?

no - married men shouldn't be rolling around w/ young women period?

Your thoughts?

Answer 1

Why not?

Should a married guy not play Tennis with a young woman?

What about Chess?

If you were a female doing BJJ you would understand. First and foremost there aren't a whole lot of females in BJJ, when you are a woman in that sort of sport, it sucks because you have very few legitimate training partners. (i.e. other girls around your size and weight). In BJJ you have to roll period, it is the only way you learn.

On top of that girls have to then be faced with guys who "treat them like girls" when rolling, meaning are very light with them, don't challenge them, which is a huge disservice. So not only as a female do you not have a lot of training partners, but the ones you have treat you with kid gloves. Which means you never get better.

So they develop a chip, and get pissed when guys are just taking it easy on them.

Again, if you did it you would understand the frustration that girls have to go through in BJJ.

Then to have another woman like yourself have these sort of views... "Well married guys shouldn't roll with young girls" I guess the same could be said about people in relationships with girlfriends...

So in your estimation only single guys can roll with girls? Doesn't that make it closer to being sexual thing or at least having a sexual tinge to it?

I think unfortunately you just aren't well informed or understand the nature of it. If you did this wouldn't even be a thought to you. It isn't a thought to me as a guy when I am rolling with a girl, there isn't anything remotely sexual and this question is so crazy to me that it would never even occur to me for someone to think this way.

Like I said, it would be the same as asking if married guys should work around with females, or lift weights with a girl, or play any kind of sport.

I think as another poster said, this stems from a lack of confidence on your part and is your hang up and not his.

Answer 2

As long as there is a barrier between the 'man tools' and the females (ie.  a cup) it is fine! AOK!!

Answer 3

get out of the dark ages it matters not if the man is married if he is going to be unfaithfull there is nothing you can do to stop it  and vice verca insecurity issues are within

Answer 4

It's just a sport, stop being insecure. Yes, it's okay.

Answer 5

throws way too much temptation out there,and competition being what it is why take chances,say no ,mean no,if questioned put your foot down NO!..........tom

Answer 6

It is the men that should be fighting.  Women should be at home taking care of the babies and such.

Answer 7

Why is this even a question? Of course its ok. Both people are trying to learn or teach the sport, and thats all.

If your a female, you should want to roll/spar with men, because in most cases if you have to use your skills in the street, its going to be against a man so you should use the time to get used to fighting a stronger (in most cases) opponent and know what actually works.

Back to your choices of answers, the only answer is: yes - it's just a sport, not sexual , so who cares?

Answer 8

I roll with married men often. I never really think

about it due to the fact i'm their to train, and i'm

pretty sure their there for the same reason. In my

eyes I see no problem with it. Plus i'd rather roll

with men then woman any day.

Answer 9

Did you catch your husband rolling with someone naked?  That's not BJJ...he was tricking you!

I'm a married man, I study JKD, Muay Thai, and BJJ in a mixed gender class.  It's not at all inappropriate to roll with a female in class.  I actually change my posturing some (hands on diaphragm instead of sternum when I'm in guard) but honestly, there's no flirting or sexual tension at all in the gym.  For the female, it's unlikely that they'll ever be assaulted by another female, so they really benefit from training with us guys.  For myself, I work much more on the precision of technique when sparring with a female opponent (ground or stand-up).  It helps me focus on form rather than strength, and sharpens my game.

I'm guessing you are jealous or uncomfortable with it.  I'd certainly mention it to your husband and discuss it with him.  After all I said above, I do think that if it makes you uncomfortable he should avoid it.  That is part of the respect that a man should show his wife.

Answer 10

Women have every right to train men do. I think it's the intentions of the person you are rolling around with that makes the difference. If you are training with someone who is serious about training and learning then the s*x of the person shouldn't matter, nor color, religion, back ground sexual orientation. Who cares? you got someone who's passionate about training!! take it and run with it. Now if you end up with some scumbag who's trying to cop a feel that's a different story, but i doubt that is the majority.

Answer 11

In judo we train on the ground, not a big deal if you are training with women. But women should not train on their period, I've seen gis with blood drop stains on their crotch when women train, and it is not appropriate.