Baby and Violent Boyfriend!?

Question

My friend just found out that she is preggers and its by her ex boyfriend who is a mean guy. Like it was a toxic relationship where they would fight constantly and he would call her names and once he even punched a hole in the wall next to where she was standing! She wants to keep the baby and I have no problem with that but she also wants the father involved in it's life! I don't know what to do! How can I help her see that its a bad decision!!

P.S. Its not me so don't even go there she is 20 years old by the way!

Answer 1

well its her baby and her decision and every child has a right to know their dad even if he is a violent person. the baby might not want to know his/her father.

Answer 2

well probably try and convince ur frnd that she can luk after the baby herself and she doent need ne1 for the baby otherwise trying 2 talk 2 the guy abt this might actually help....y dont u try 2 ask ur frnd 2 drop the idea of the baby...there isnt any prob but isnt she too young??let her live her life in her youth and then she can hv as many babies as she wants 2..!!

Answer 3

ok well it is a decision only she can make.

and a very hard decision aswell.

you cant push her into make a decision but you can help her, by showing her what you think the right thing to do is.

you could tell her that he is obviously violent and that she could be putting the baby at risk.

he is her ex boyfriends for a reason.. and she needs to remember that !

i dont no the guys, but if u think he is really that bad... you can only advise your friend to keep herself, and most importantly, the baby away from him...

she may decide to have controled visits with her and the father..not leaving them alone or together for too long..

she may also decide for them to be a part of eachothers lives at first and then, somthing may happen (i hope not) were she feels the baby is no longer safe with him.. at this point she can stop seeing him or if it gets really bad she can get a restraining order

i hope i helped answer you question

good luck

xx

Answer 4

No matter what if she has the baby even at 20 yrs old it is going to be very very hard to do it herself. If she keeps the baby she will have to deal with her ex for the next 18 years and she should think about how healthy the kids life would be with a relationship like that between its parents. In my opinion the parents would be better of with an abortion and it will also spare one more kid from growing up in a family like that..

Answer 5

Just tell your friend to think deeply for this situation she might be thinking hes the best but she might change her decision...

THEY HAD SE*?

Answer 6

Your friend's right. That jerk should be told and he'd better own up some responsibility and mend his ways for good once and for all.

Answer 7

yikes... Well maybe he will be a better father than he was a boyfriend. She should maybe try it out and if its not working out because he is violent etc then get full custody and move on but he should get the initial rights to be a father if he wants to be. Just because he would be involved in the child's life also doesn't mean he is actively involved in her life.  

Answer 8

Your friend is a mother now. So every decision she makes can affect the baby a great deal. Since he is a bad influence it's best for the baby to stay away from the daddy cause of his behavior untill the father gets his act together. IT's very unhealthy for a baby to be in a unhealthy relationship. So tell her to really think about her situation and choose what's best for the baby sakes.