Baby only wants mommy?

Question

My daughter is 10 month old and she is so attached to me. She's breastfed and I think that's the reason she always wants to be next to me. I have areal problem she'll have to go to grandma's house soon because school starts on the 23rd. I don't know how to give granny instructions on how to tame my little madison. (granny is not old shes only like 41)..my question is what can I do now to prepare me, madison and granny for when mommy has to go away for some hours?

Answer 1

Your best bet is to start offering her expressed breastmilk in a cup BEFORE she starts going to her grandmother's house, that way she has time to get used to the idea.  However, a lot of children will take a bottle from someone else, but not from the BFing mother because they want the breast.  Every child is different.  With my children, I always offered them a cup of EBM with every solid 'meal' they had.  Spend lots of time with her over her grandmother's house if you don't already, that way she can get used to being around her.  

When you drop her off, try and hang out with her for 10 or 15 min, to get her settled, instead of dropping her off quickly and leaving.  You can also make sure she has a blanket/stuffed animal, or anything that reminds her of home.  if you have her on a schedule, such as lunch, then nap every day, make sure she stays on the schedule because this will help keep a sense of familiarity.

Edited to add- I would not introduce a bottle just to try and wean her off of it in a few months.  I would definitely go with a cup.

Answer 2

Babies should be attached to their mothers. It is a very healthy attachment. I have the same problem. My son is 8 months, breastfed and never had a bottle or pacifier. Do you have to be gone for more than 3-4 hours at a time? If not I would not worry. Send a bottle, pumped milk (or even formula or just water). Your baby may wait until you are back.

    I would try introducing her to a sippy cup or even a regular cup. My son will drink from a regular cup or water bottle and really likes water. Don't give your baby juice!!! Start spending more time at grandma's house with your baby, just hanging out. Try leaving for just a few minutes without making a big deal about it. Let your baby get used to grandma. I am able to leave my son with Nana (my mom) for 3-4 hours without anything other than water and he does well. Good luck with it!! When you do leave your baby, say a short goodbye and leave. Don't linger, it only makes it harder for baby. They cry to see your reaction. Usually what I do is get to Nana's with some time to spare. I let him get comfortable hanging out with Nana. I give him love and hand him off. My mom engages him in an activity, even a walk (try it!) right away and I leave. He hardly cries at all. I'm sure things will go well, your baby will be in experienced hands.

Answer 3

My little one is really attached as well.  THe only one she stays with well is my husband's sister.  And that took several weeks.  I only work a couple of days a week and she stays with her.

I agree with the cup idea.  Get her used to it at meal times.  Also you might invite grandma over for lunch and let her feed her with you close by so baby can get used to someoneelse feeding her.  And then transistion that to grandma's home and let grandma feed her there.  You might try a few short trips while there, even if you just walk around the block.  It will get her used to mom will be back.  Just build your time up until it is close to the amount of time you will be gone.

Try to make grandma's the fun zone.  Take some special toys over and ler her just play with them there.  Something she really enjoys.

Good luck it takes time but it will get better.

Answer 4

ok - I went through the same thing but had to leave town for work for 5 days and flew my mom into town to help my husband with my daughter.  Start by doing:

1.  Every day, show your daughter pictures of granny - or pop by and see her - EVERYDAY!  Infants need repetition to learn and recognize faces they see on a frequent basis.  call her on the telephone and let her hear her voice.  if you have a routine, have granny mimic the same routine.  start by spending time together - just the three of you with granny holding her and you nearby.

2.  Start pumping and give her a bottle.  She may not take the bottle from you as she will see/smell your b*****s but have granny or someone give her a bottle.  When she's hungry and your not around, she will take the bottle.  What bottles are you planning on using?  Use large nipple that mimics the shape of the breast (I use Playtex drop-ins).  if you are not going to pump, rather, wean her onto formula, start now and eliminate one feeding a week to slowly transition her to a bottle.  start with the daytime feedings as night feedings are comforting and should be the last to go. I assume she's on some solids too?  Have granny come over for feedings---and have her feed with you nearby.

3.  Play peek a boo as it teaches babies that momma always returns and remember, babies have no concept of time...they know you were gone but they dont realize just how long.  I started my daughter in daycare twice a week and it was hard - she still has her good/bad days but she's durable and safe with her teachers.

4.  Do you have a little blankie or what they call a transitionary object that she can rub and love with you - in your arms but then also have when you are not there---so she can learn to self soothe with a familiar object?  See www.taggies.com or something similiar.

5.  time - she will be just fine and may cry----but she'll be loved and cared for by granny and will be so excited to see you later on!